Weekly-ish musings. I know these are long winded but I don't get a chance to write daily entries so just dump everything down that I've done and what I was thinking during that week.
Bruce impresses but Essex disappoints - 02/07/07
Not a massive week in the grand scheme of things, though I got up to a few things. I seemed to have quite a few late nights. Not work related but rather as I tinkered and put the new section up. One night I had another chat with Jen, which was cool. The internet world is pretty similar to the real world in that it's hard to meet nice, genuine people. I go on about as much as I do in the hope that something I've mentioned attracts the odd one or two who can make a difference. Along with Amy and Steph, I'd say Jen belongs in this category. She's fun, intelligent and entertaining. Internet friendships, for want of a better word, can be short or long and just like the other two I can't say how long I might know them. What is comforting though is that purely through having my website I have made three genuine connections with really cool people and ultimately that is what having and running my website is about.
During the course of the week I noticed that my rear tyres seemed to have slow punctures. One of them was practically flat when I pumped it up on Tuesday morning and it seemed to last until Thursday night before needing another substantial fill up. My friend recommended heading up to a tyre place on the Old Kent Rd to get them to take a look at it. They were a bit rough and ready but more than helpful and friendly. They jacked the car up and discovered a nail in each rear tyre. If I'd taken the car in for a service, which it's due for soon, I would have been told they were damaged beyond repair yet these guys removed the nails and repaired both tyres for just £14. It felt great not to have had to fork out nearly £80 a tyre and I felt nicely up.
Booked during the week the final pieces of the Orlando jigsaw. As these needed to be booked direct in the States I had wanted to wait for my Nationwide card to arrive so I didn't get stung with an overseas transaction charge (watch the pennies and the pounds will come). Anyway I got us VIP tickets for Dolly Parton, front row no less for charming the lady on the phone, and also for Medieval Times. I tried to work a similar magic with the lady at the Kennedy Space Centre, not that I was trying to getting anything, rather just demonstrating my enthusiasm. She must have been the most miserable Yank working in Florida that day. Also booked us into the Disney Hoop Dee Doo Revue dinner show. I remember this being one of the first ever things I'd read about in the travel books when I was a lot younger and there was no I was going to miss it. There are three performances during the evening at 5.00, 7.15 and 9.30 and the woman sais she had absolutely nothing for the first two ones yet masses of availability for the last one at 9.30pm. I did wonder if because she knew we were two adult males that she assumed we would be rowdy and put us in the later one. She said that wasn't the case when I jokingly challenged her and although later than we had wanted it did mean that we had near the front seats.
We couldn't book the Airboat private tour as they didn't take bookings anymore, you just turned up and we reserved a good table in the 50's Prime Time grill for our evening meal when in Disney MGM. So that is pretty much it for the holiday. All the attractions tickets, dinners, flights, hotel, car and insurance are taken care of. It's just a case of saving some spending cash, deciding whether to take an empty suitcase to fill up, sorting out the dog tags, ordering a couple more of my 'zany' t-shirts to help instigate conversation in the clubs and attempting to lose a few more pounds. It feels good knowing it's even more solid, though when it gets closer I think I might experience a little trepidation about what might go wrong etc.
Friday night and we got some fisn'n'chips for tea to have with our step dad and give him his powerboat voucher. The wrapped M&S biscuit variety helped provide a little distraction but I think he was quite chuffed with his powerboating experience. I'm not sure how much of it he took on board as he hasn't done one of these kind of 'red letter day' experiences before but it should be a good day and the three of us will try to organise our diaries and get a date booked.
Bruce Willis was on Jonathan Ross on Friday night and I've got to say that the guy is cool. He's moved into that George Clooney area of ageing with real class and with his shaved head, lean physique and black suit and shirt he looked smooth. He was also quite funny. He has that slow, measured style of delivery that can initially seem quite arrogant in its reticence but he must see so many chat show hosts that he probably needs a little time to warm up. Jonathan played a trick on him by answering a mobile phone call during the show. It was in return for Bruce doing it in Ross' last interview with him a year ago. Jonathan's call was apparently from his mother in law but Bruce asked to have the phone and launched straight in with a 'what are you wearing right now?'. It was his spontaneity that I liked and this continued when JR got out the chilli chocolate russian roulette game. You get the impression with these movie stars that everything is always so scripted and measured that they'll never do anything off the cuff but Bruce came across really well for taking it in his stride and having a laugh. Even at the end of the interview you could hear him through the applause thanking JR and telling him that he was a funny man. Nice work Bruce. If could have a smidge of that cool and charm heading north of 50, I'd be pretty chuffed.
The MotoGP in Assen, Holland took place on Saturday, probably to avoid clashing with the F1. It was an entertaining race as Casey Stoner scampered off into the lead. Rossi set about trying to reel him in and for once I was actually cheering on Rossi to catch him. I'm not switching camps or anything but I like to see exciting racing and Vale is the only one with the balls to have a go. He did catch him and after three laps of hanging behind him managed to get past for a deserved win. Nicky Hayden came in third which was a great result bearing in mind his awful season. He's such a nice guy and hope this year he gets some more success by adopting a devil may care - I can't win the championship so might as well go for it -mood.
Headed to the gym for another knackering session before heading over to pick my brother up. As time was a little tight I didn't bother going into the steam room and just hit the showers straight after my session. What is wrong with some people's spatial awareness. When I get changed in the locker room, like most normal people I'll try and find a space away from others, yet as I was getting undressed this guy plonks down close behind and chooses a locker next to where I'm standing. I don't think he was gay or anything but I felt like turning round and saying "Mate do you really have to be this close to me or take a locker this close to where I am standing". I was trying to take off sweat sodden clothes and disrobe for the shower yet this guy was invading my body space. I should have just removed by boxers and presented my sweat glistened butt crack into his face as he sat down to tie his laces but I decided against it.
Headed into Essex and particularly Romford that night. I'd been to a few Essex nightclubs when I was a lot younger and had always been impressed at the extra effort that the women there always seemed to make. Ok there were some that went a little over the top but on the whole the quantity and quality of females was always better than what we were used to. I therefore wanted to see if this was still the case and also to give my brother his first taste of them. We considered Southend as this was where I remember seeing the best selection but decided to try a little closer to home in Romford. A little internet research revealed a club called The Opium Lounge that was over 21's, open until 5.00am and had a free guest list if you out your name down online.
We decided to give this a try, thinking that if it was poor we could move onto Time & Envy, which was the bigger, more popular club in town. When we found the club, and I must add Romford centre was disturbingly quiet for a pay day Saturday night, early impressions were good. It was done out in a Turkish style with plenty of comfy chairs and little booths with scatter cushions etc. There was a good selection of bars and the drinks weren't too steep either. We'd got there around 10.30 ish and settled in for some chatting and to see what developed.
Unfortunately not a great deal did. The club did get busy, probably about 1/2 to 2/3rds full but I hardly saw anyone that 'lit my fire'. I'm not trying to being unkind to the girls there but I didn't find many of them attractive and I'm sure the feeling would have been mutual had they been asked. Maybe I'd been spoilt after the previous Saturday nights highlight but I thought the women were better looking in the places we normally go. I don't know if it was because of the slightly older crowd who seemed to know everyone else or the house music which wasn't fast enough to be a rave but too fast to have a laugh on the dance floor. There just wasn't that spark or air of excitement that something might happen or one of us might catch someones eye.
Like some of the areas in the Venue it would be a great place to take a bunch of people. With a late finish and those little booth areas it would be very cool to be able to chat, chill out and then have a boogie if one wanted. It was spacious, getting served was never a problem and even the GTA was polite, smartly dressed and friendly without any of the annoying songs that they chant. Maybe it just lacked that impulsive energy that a younger crowd brings rather than the slightly more mature and sensible one that it had. We gave it a good go until about 3.30am before blowing the joint. Stopped at the McDonalds in Docklands for a particularly fine quarterpounder with cheese meal before dropping off my mate.
The French F1 grand prix was a little boring and predictable with a 1-2 for Ferrari and Hamilton continuing his run of podiums places with an ok 3rd. Gorged on a some pizza hut for tea along with step dad, well it was his birthday weekend before watching School for Scoundrels with Billy Bob Thornton and the guy from Napoleon Dynamite. It was ok but didn't offer the sharp wit and clever humour that the trailer had intimidated that it would. Indeed every single decent scene was featured in the trailer.
The Insider was on ITV4 that night and despite it being on ridiculously late, I had to stay up and watch a fair chunk of it. It's such an awesone piece of work. I like the films of Michael Mann such as Last of the Mohicans and Heat but I have to say I think this is his finest film. The shoot out in Heat is great but I didn't like Al's wife and the whole story with his step daughter and I thought the ending was a little lame. The Insider is something else. Al Pacino is just awesome as the 60 minutes producer trying to tell the story, retain his integrity and protect his source while Russell Croww is simply outstanding as the whistleblower. He injects the character with this nervous uncertainty that is miles away from his normal heroic roles. I love the piece of music with the Spanish guitar when Wigand is driving to the courthouse, the moment when his lawyer shouts down the big tobacco lawyer and when Pacino is animatedly defending the programme in the offices of CBS. What a killer film, outstanding.
We did have some muppets try and start a bombing campaign over the weekend but it's so pathetic and I'm so un fazed by it that I can't be arsed to comment on it. I don't say this as some kind of tough guy but rather because they only do this to cause disruption and thus paying them any form of recognition or altering your life only lets them win.
Another chance slips me by - 25/06/07
I eventually got the car insurance renewal quote back from my insurers and my three points have earnt me a £70 increase in my premium. Brilliant. So along with my spot fine, my transgression, cost me a total of £130. When you lump the two together it's a useful sum that could have been used for something far more enjoyable and productive.
Booked my step dad's birthday present that I'm getting in conjuction with my brother on Tuesday. When we were younger we always used to head down to Dorset for the annual holiday. Along with the regular visit to Nellie Crumbs in Wareham (finest cream tea in south England) and Swanage, we would always head out to Portland Bill to see the offshore powerboats that would race from the Isle of Wight, skimming past the outlying Bill and across Lyme Bay before turning round and heading back. He used to love it and it was one of his passions though it was a difficult sport to follow bearing in mind that TV stations at the time rarely covered the more eclectic sports.
It's always a toughie to know what to get him so we decided on a kind of red letter day where he could go out in a Honda F-4 offshore powerboat. It takes place in Southampton and means he gets to go out down Southampton Water and out into the Solent, naturally with an instructor. The whole thing last about one and a half hours and he should even get to take the controls for 15 minutes. We hope it will be a really nice day for him and nice for the three of us to spend some time together. We booked it through a company called Exelement and the guy I spoke to was great. He'd been on the actual excursion and talked well about it. Even for someone who as it happened actually owned the company and had done his fair share of adrenaline stuff he still really enjoyed it. It's just a voucher at the moment and we will need to arrange a Saturday or a Sunday when the three of us can do it but I hope he likes it. We always struggle to get him anything as he provides little inspiration besides asking for vouchers!
IGN had reported how bungie fans had discovered through the receipt of a mysterious email from Microsoft a secret website that had some kind of Halo connection. http://206.16.223.65/ It had a countdown running on it and when it reached 0 (not that I was witnessing it when it did that) it revealed a spinning server. On this were some symbols which if you clicked on them would allow you to download snippets of information. None of it was really clear but it eluded to some kind of message from the forefathers, ie those responsible for building the Halo rings. Ultimately it talked about how they had done something when there was no other option left to wipe out the 'antithesis of life' (aka The Flood). It sounds geeky but it stoked me up about the story behind Halo and added another delicious nugget of what further depths Halo 3 might uncover.
Managed to download a couple of State of Trance's on Thursday. I've missed out on a few weeks worth and it's great to keep up on some fresh trance, particularly when in the gym or keeping me entertained when bored. When out to our local Indian/Nepalese restaurant that night as one of our work colleagues was leaving. We had a good laugh and the curry was excellent as always. I couldn't decide between the tikka massala or pasanda so I went for both but we were all sharing so it wasn't entirely for me. I'd gone without lunch so I made sure I had a damn good scoff. We all had dessert but I had to have the special kids ice cream that came in this kind of plastic penguin. I guess my colleagues think I'm some kind of kid, what would give them that idea? It was nice ice cream but it's plastic feet seemed to have come off so after finishing the ice cream I playfully demanded that I wanted the penguin's feet. They must have still been in the freezer and as the owners are still keen to build up their clientele, they got me another one. This one did have feet, making it a far more useful keepsake but I did have to eat another load of ice cream!
Friday was the colleagues last day and we started it with an unhealthy sandwich from the cafe opposite. I've slowy moved away from having either a bacon or sausage sandwich from there as the bacon was like eating rubber whose rind meant that the thing bungee'd back up your throat once you thought you'd swallowed and the sausages were dry and hard as anything. The best solution from there is a double fried egg sandwich. You can't screw up a fried egg, well he can't, and with a sprinkling of cheese and splodge of ketchup it's the perfect morning starter. We were quite busy but I managed to catch a trailer for a New Zealand film that looked great fun called Black Sheep. It's in a similar vein to Dog Soldiers with clever humour, horror and action in equal measure. I don't think it will be out over here until October but I look forward to catching it then.
Hired out Apocalypto that night and I thought it was an amazing film. I've got a lot of respect for Mel Gibson. So he doesn't like the Jews, so what? He wanted to make a film about Christ in the native Aramaic and all the studios told him it would never work. He wasn't daunted and raised the finance himself, making a deserved killing when the film did amazing business. I must confess that I still haven't actually seen The Passion of the Christ. So he made a shit load of money allowing him to self finance anything he wanted to make. Instead of doing a George Lucas and using the freedom and independance to turn out the same old crowd pleasing, vanilla pap Gibson films another foreign language film with unknown actors in an unfamiliar setting.
Although set in the jungle and highlighting the Mayan race, Mel doesn't get bogged down in over indulgent, pretensious shots of jungle wildlife or sunlight glistening off streams. He sets the story within those realms and lets the setting be the backdrop rather than the actual story. It's graphic, brutal and violent but hugely entertaining and exhilarating. The music by James Horner is spot on, the acting breath taking and the action scenes highly charged. It's not formulaic and although you might find yourself trying to second guess what might happen to characters, the script and direction keeps you fresh on your toes. A genuinely brilliant, unique film and one that I'll be investigating for a future purchase.
I thought I had to go into my local branch to validate my new account on Saturday but apparently upon getting there was told I didn't. It closed at 12.00 so I'd pushed to be in my local area for 11.30, which on a normal Saturday would be ridiculous. At least we were up and after my brother got himself a shirt that looked really cool on him we headed down to the swimming pool. It was my shameful one nod to the health drive all week. I've had this dull ache behind my kneecaps and I wasn't sure if it was pushing too hard or from taking a few days off.
Went out that night into Blackheath for a friend of a friend's birthday. Something was different in the bar and there seemed a far higher proportion of girls, which naturally was fantastic. The gang that were out for the birthday girl was 2 to 1 females to men and there was another gaggle of six or seven females in the corner that I noticed remained together even when they headed downstairs.
I got chatting to a woman I'd met at the birthday girls housewarming party and amazingly remembered me. Her life story was fascinating and amazing. She'd been a dancer who had travelled the world appearing at the Lido in Paris, the Stardust in Las Vegas and Sun City in South Africa. Not only had she made something of her life and pushed it to the extremes of enjoyment and travel but she had also then managed to hang up her dancing shoes and raise what sounded like two very talented girls. It humbled me at what is achievable in one's life when you really go for it.
Talking to her about her time as a dancer in Paris reminded me of my fondness and amazement at the women of Crazy Horses (see my Paris trip report in Holidays). She tried to convince me how when she was a dancer she was lonely as few men would talk to her. She argued a convincing case and there was some legitimacy in how at the time women couldn't/wouldn't approach men. She talked about how the girls would finish their shows then party until dawn dancing and having fun and then sleeping on the beach during the day to work on their tan. I still don't believe the thing about them being lonely. Maybe it applied then but it certainly can't now. It's too crushing to imagine that these wonderful women would consider mere mortal men if they were just given the chance of an introduction. The calibre of women at Crazy Horses that I saw where such that I'm sure they could pretty much have any man they wanted. I'd love to believe that if you could just create an introduction I'd have a chance with my love of dancing and having fun but we all know the reality. I would need to be loaded beyond my dreams and be able to offer them something that they didn't already have for them to even notice me.
We moved downstairs to the dance area and I immediately noticed this girl who was dancing with two other female friends. I think she noticed me as well and despite the dim lighting and regular directional beams right into my eyes I tried my best to look at her some more. She was a lovely thing. Short, slim but with some curves, tanned, pretty in the face (though this was hard to get a good long look at) and had this wonderful bobbed blonde hair. It must have been a great cut for despite the movement of her dancing it would always return to it's rightful place, like something out of a silvikrin advert.
She wore a pair of dark jeans and this silky green camisole top that had the tiniest, thinnest little straps holding it up. She must have been wearing a strapless bra or the top had a built in underwire as she didn't have any chunky, unsightly bra straps on show. She looked cute and bubbly but also classy. Nice shoes and not too much jewellery. Oh and she could dance as well. A lot more than the basic side step shuffle but without descending into pussy cat doll sluttiness. We exchanged more glances and I was certain she had clocked me but fears and a lack of confidence crept in. Granted she might like what she saw but the nice illusion she had built up would be shattered if I went over and bumbled through an introduction. It was almost like the anticipation of what could be was better than the reality of floundering conversation and a desire to bolt for the door when I realised I was crashing and burning.
I saw a couple of guys moving in with the whole 'dance really close behind them whilst brushing your groin against their arse and wait for them to turn around' approach. I almost wanted her to respond to them as my disappointment would be nullified by the confirmation that she was just like the rest of them who would respond to that bullshit. I even considered whether offering to rescue them might be a way in. I sarcastically commented to one of her friends "blimey, I think this gentleman is really interested in you" as they increased their efforts to desperately blatant levels. She smiled but I don't think she heard or understood me. And here was the problem with attempting an approach.
How could I say something clever and funny that she would actually hear without having a painful stand still and shout in her ear moment. Along with her mates, she brushed the guys aside with ease and glanced over again. Christ if she was looking at someone else I would have been screaming at them 'she's giving you all the signals, go for it'. But my old fears returned. I don't want to be like all those other guys who assume the opening gambit is a shameless grope.
The lady I'd been speaking to earlier was boosting my ego by saying how good I was at chatting to people and that it was one of my strengths. The difference though is that in a house party environment, which is where she'd first seen me, you have a platform to work from. You have the time to breathe and people give you the chance to impress, even it it's because they have nowhere else to go. In a club/bar environment, you are only as good as your last sentence. There is no room for pauses, silences or mistakes. I'm sure people reading this are shouting at the monitor saying 'just go over, say hello and keep it simple for gods sake'.
As the night progressed I felt my chance beginning to slip away. In my mind I wanted to go and tell her that I had spotted her the moment I came down and as she'd noticed hadn't been able to take my eyes off her since. What was her name, what did she do, what did she like? Instead all I could do was stand there attempting to dance with the others yet feeling like I was floundering like a man with his feet set in concrete. At one point one of her straps slipped off her shoulders and she must have danced like that for about 4 - 5 minutes. God it was so damn sexy. Again, for anyone else I would have said that she knew it had come off and wanted the observing person to notice but as it was me I thought ' No, it can't be that'.
The crowd began to thin out and I watched as a guy walked past and unashamedly rubbed her arse with his hand. I thought she might turn and blame me but he disappeared in seconds. The mauling muppets that girls must have to put up with never ceases to amaze me. And then she was gone. She collected her coat with her mates and I considered attempting something but the moment had been an hour earlier and anything done now would look crap and lame.
Maybe if she'd given me an 'out and out' beamer of a smile that would have been my green light. I know women still expect men to make the approach, which I respect, and maybe in the subtleties of attraction and interaction in a club you aren't ever going to receive an 'out and out' invitation. Naturally once she was gone sensibility returned and I thought why didn't I just say something? Surely anyone would be flattered at someone coming over. She had declined other guys so it wasn't like she was just looking for any port in the storm as some girls seem to.
It bugged me for the rest of the weekend. Maybe I wouldn't have liked her if I'd got chatting, maybe up close she might not have seemed as pretty (and I'm not implying she would have thought I was any better up close). Maybe it's better to maintain my dead end status quo. What with the hol's coming up would I really want the distraction of something developing to distract me from that or eat into my finances. My brother pointed out that I was being silly and I couldn't let the holiday stand in the way of meeting someone special. What am I saying though? This was someone who just caught my eye in a club and I didn't respond to. It was hardly going to be the special one. Had to drive some of the girls in the party home and after doing so grabbed some late night KFC for a chicken munch up as dawn's first light crested over the horizon. I have to also say that my brother was great that night. He looked so cool in his new shirt. Slim, buff, good looking and comfortable holding court on the dance floor with some killer moves that put mine to shame. He's such a great guy and I'm eternally proud of him.
Watched a rained out MotoGP at Donnington on the Sunday. The rain only served to spread the field out and remove any great deal of excitement. Still Casey Stoner deservedly won again, extending his lead over Rossi in the championship. It was a shitty day outside and with little else to do bar some washing and drying with the heating on watched Matrix Revolutions again in the afternoon. Followed this with a short nap that seemed to make all the difference and is something I might need to investigate when we hit Orlando. Watched Brother, where art thou that evening. We'd both seen the last hour of it a year or so back and really enjoyed it. This was our chance to watch the whole thing. Good little film and one of the most accessible Coen films that I know of.
Walked my brother home and then went for one of my marathon, hour long midnight walks. I needed to do some form of physical exertion, I'd got a good State of Trance that I wanted to listen to on my nano and I wanted to think a little more about Saturday night. Being able to talk about it on this journal really helps. Committing my thoughts down for others and myself to read almost stops it from eating me up inside and helps it to lose some of its power. It also I hope makes for slightly more entertaining reading than the 'yeah I went out and not much happened'.
Until that day.
PS I'm sure my legion of dedicated, nay obsessive fans will have noticed that I added another section to my site this week. It's one that I've considered putting up for a few months now. It's probably the most personal/revealing in a way but I hope it amuses more than it shocks. Content is a little light at the moment and I have pulled in a few pieces from other sections but I think there are one or two good stories in there. We will see how it gets on.
Another notch in the Bad Boy handle - 18/06/07
Back to the pool on Monday for another belt out in the pool. Thankfully the late night canoeing that used to occupy the pool from 9pm on a Monday night doesn't seem to happen anymore and thus I can turn up later for a swim. This is handy because after 9pm the numbers begin to dwindle and hence the chances of being delayed and annoyed by some slow moving arse are lessened.
Headed home for my first stab at the leftovers of the spag bol. There was a big chunk left and eating it completely nullified any good work I'd done in the pool but it tasted good. I did feel fat and it led to feeling a bit low. Man, am I ever going to shift this extra weight and ultimately would it make any difference? Was I deluding myself that I'd be any more successful in the clubs in the US? It's not that I think I will be any more or less attractive over there but rather that I'm expecting to be so excited and charged that it will carry me over any hurdles. There is a certain freedom and liberty in knowing that you won't see these people again and I'm hoping this is what will make the difference.
What I realised though is that I've effectively discounted meeting anyone in the UK for the rest of the year. I've the holiday, I've got paintballing, I've got Halo 3, the release of some great films and even my best mate getting an awesome car yet the notion of meeting anyone is as distant as winning the lottery. I just seem to plod on from day to day with practically no one being aware of or caring for my existence. This might be easier to accept if I was cold, insular or miserable. Yet I try to be friendly, open and honest. I'm fun to be with and you'd think the website would provide a little more exposure but it all makes no difference. I don't use this site to get girls but just to 'reach out' if possible. Ok there may be faults with it and it's not interactive enough for people to leave comments but does my earnest honesty count for nothing?
Well the interaction I was talking about came on Tuesday morning. I've been chatting www.kentuckygurl.com, she was the one behind my entry on 30th April who had come from the pasting that I'd received at italk2much. As I said at the time she likes a long email and we'd exchanged a few which was good fun. Anyway she has on her blog, in the top left hand corner, a little box that talks about a webcam. I've noticed it for quite a few weeks but it's never been on and I kind of discarded it. We were quiet this morning and as I went on to read her latest entry, there she was in the box.
It felt really weird seeing her. You see pictures of people that you communicate with and have an image of them in your mind when they are sitting at their PC but to see them actually moving around adds a frightening sense of reality. It seemed really voyeuristic and felt that I was doing something naughty. She couldn't see me yet I could of her. Mention a webcam and there always seems to be a porn connection and I strangely seemed to get a small knot in my stomach. I wasn't scared of speaking to her but it suddenly seemed very real and I was concerned that others in the office might think it strange. I wasn't talking to a mailbox anymore but an actual person.
I did some MSN with a girl over a year back and whereas our emails were fine when we tried the messenging route everything seemed to go wrong. We felt miles apart in how our minds worked and almost everything I said seemed to get taken the wrong way. Kentuckygurl is married and I wasn't trying to woo her but Ii wondered whether I would be funny and entertaining when it was more immediate and what if I suddenly got busy and had to go? I dived in and it was amazing. Thankfully the rapport between us was good but the incredible thing was being able to type something and then see her expression as she read it. Technology is amazing isn't it? I mean I was aware of webcams and all but it isn't until you actually use one in practise that you can truly appreciate it. It's amazing to think that if I had a web camera or even just a microphone you could chat away virtually for free.
Drove home late that night and had the joy of being tail gated by a motorbike most of the way. What is it with these fucks. You are on a bike not a car so just go round me like all your other kind do. Why should I change lane for a goddam motorcyclist? As you enjoy sitting in my blind spot, it's likely that just as I attempt to change lane after your continued presence that this will be when you eventually decide to go round me and I end up taking you out. Anyway this chump caused my anger levels to rise somewhat in the car and hence when I came across him later on driving slowly, took the chance to cut him up a little. I wasn't dangerous but having gone from being up my arse to a dawdling tortoise he needed to be taught a lesson. I came off the three lane A road and noticed that a black BMW had also done so even though he'd been in the middle lane. I got to the mini roundabout, hooked a right and gave it some welly. He seemed to drop back and I turned left onto a two lane dual carriageway. Next thing I notice is that he's turned left also and has the police lights on as it was an unmarked police car. I stop on the carriageway but lean out of the window to ask him whether it would be better if I pulled up in the bowling alley car park which is about 200 metres on.
He asked if I could do this and I don't know if this demonstrated that bar the speeding I had a little road savvy. We pulled up and he said
"Ok, you were doing a little speeding on the A road and did cut across a motorbike causing him to brake but this isn't why I have pulled you over. I've done so because of your speeding in a 30mph zone. Why were you speeding?"
There's no point in lying so I responded that "I thought he was chasing me but there aren't really any excuses for my speeding". We didn't discuss the actual figure, and thinking about it now he might not have known it otherwise he woud have mentioned it, but it was over 50mph. I wanted to say that it was a shame he hadn't seen the tail-gating areshole motorcyclist but you never want to antagonise them if you don't have to. He threatened that he could take me up infront of a magistrate but that instead he would issue with me a speeding ticket, resulting in a fine and endorsable points. Being in a state of thinking 'christ, I really can't afford to lose my license' I was happy to just take the points. He asked if I had any ID. I never carry my driving license but remembered that I had my insurance details in the car as it was due for renewal at the end of the month. I handed him the information and he looked through it.
"This insurance runs out on the 6th June" he said. I knew it didn't but still it sent a chill through my heart. Christ, pulled for speeding and then get done for not being insured, made even worse by the fact that I'd handed him the evidence! I didn't want to say 'you are wrong arsehole' and I could see he was thinking 'I've had a result'. I looked through my bag a bit more whilst he looked through the attached sheets. He then conceeded that he'd been looking at the wrong page and that it did expire on the 29th June. I knew it was then but it was a relief to have it proved.
As in the previous time that I'd been pulled I didn't quite know what to do with myself whilst he wrote out the ticket. Do I put my hands behind my back like a naughty schoolboy, do I put my hands in my pocket and give the impression that I'm not appreciating the consequences of my actions. He finished up and I thanked him, what else was I supposed to do. It was kind of frustrating. You find yourself thinking if I'd come home a different route or not had the motorcyclist would it have been different.
In the end though I do a lot of driving and do sometimes push the boundaries of the speed limit, so getting done for speeding is just something that happens. I can't really grumble when I think of the times I have speeded so I took my licks fairly. A £60 fine and three points on my license, that I know will have a financial impact on the figure of my renewal quotation, stings but surely it makes me even more of a bad boy? Couple this with my nightclub barring and I should be a virtual babe magnet. All I need to do is 'pop' my collar and kick the shit out of an innocent bystander and I'll be in the highest echelons of bad boyness, able to choose whichever girl takes my fancy.
Had a meeting at one of our major clients on my own on Wednesday. I was a little anxious about it. The companies situation is a little more fluid at the moment and hence I don't want to do anything wrong or make any bumbling mistakes. I don't think I would. I mean I used to be an estate agent and hence am well versed in dealing and interacting with people. You just always think of the worst case scenario and being asked the killer 'achilles heel' question that stops you dead in your tracks right in the middle of the meeting. It was a nice day and having had the car cleaned it felt good driving home. I must have left there at about 5.30pm, which couldn't have been a worse time for the drive.
Hit the gym once I'd got back and it was good to see that on a midweek venture the same old antics take place. People on mobile while apparently exercising, pumped guys wandering up and down the whole gym for totally spurios reasons to simply strutt or girls that go to the effort of putting on gym gear only to do about 5 mins on the rower.
The film Space Cowboys was on that night with Clint Eastwood and the gang. It's an enjoyable romp about four oldies going up into space but it did make me think about the questions I want to ask when we lunch with an astronaut at Kennedy. 'How amazing are the stars when seen in space' is one and another is 'Does going into space change you forever. In that as humans we've always known the Earth as home. Our environments are land, water and air yet stepping out of that and seeing the fragility of the planet in the emptiness of space must mess with your head. We know the Earth is big but you never, unless you go into space, get to see it all neatly in one package'. Talking of Kennedy the attraction tickets that I'd ordered came through along with a free underwater camera which was a nice touch. Seeing them in hard format adds another element to the onset of the holiday, which is great.
Work was quiet so I didn't do a great deal for the remainder of the week bar a spot of swimming on Thursday night which was ok. Driving into work on Friday morning and I heard on the radio that Johnny Vaughan and the Capital Radio morning gang were at EuroDisney in Paris to celebrate it's 25th anniversary. Being still really into Voyage, voyage as I'd played it almost continuously the night before I decided to text them and suggest that as they were in Paris maybe they should drop the song. The song dates back to 1986 but amazingly 20 minutes later and they actually played it! I couldn't believe it. Capital radio is like London's premier radio station yet my oddball suggestion had got through and they actually went with it. Ok it was cut short as Johnny thought it was rubbish but either way I'd managed to affect the listening tastes of London that morning!!
Caught the last two thirds of a film on Friday night called The Company of Men. It starred Aaron Eckhart, who I like, as one of two guys who decide to 'get back' at women by dating at the same time a new female work colleague. The thing is the woman they chose was a deaf woman. She could do sign language but when she talked it in that slightly duller way that they do it struck this protective chord that really made me want to look after her. She was so sweet and these two guy's game was cruel, particularly when Aaron's character broke up with her and left her just destroyed. I realise they made the woman deaf to increase the dislike of the two guys and with no form of comeuppance against the two blokes it was quite a sombering, thought provoking film.
Had promised that I would go with P when she first let Biscuit off her lead when taking her for a walk. I didn't mind and was looking forward to seeing Biscuit running around free from the lead. I also understood the reassurance that P wanted from me being there. Biscuit was amazing. Considering it was the first time she'd been let off on her own she would come back when called and unless investigating something, would canter along within a comfortable 10 foot radius of us, looking back frequently to make sure we were still there. It was a long old walk and I'd forgotten how big parts of the Epping Forest can get.
Had a spot to eat afterwards and watched an episode of Andrew Marr's excellent series on the political history of Britain. The period of the programme was that of Margaret Thatcher, who I've always had a lot of time for. She might not have been always popular but at least she stood for something, was prepared to argue and defend her country and opinion and almost singlehandedly dragged this country from the shocking hole that it was slipping into. Granted she administered some tough medicine to our sick country and the resulting hardship did not endear her to many but it was exactly what this country needed. The successes of our country and it's current state is largely attributed to the measures that she brought in. In my opinion she was the greatest leader this country has had since a war time Churchill and in some areas even better than him.
I had to do a producer of my driving license at a police station following my being 'pulled'. Tried to do it at my local, village police station but this rather pointlessly is only open 10am - 2pm on Tuesdays and Thursdays. En route to Bluewater to pick up my brother I stopped at the bigger police station in Bexleyheath. Here I was asked if I could come back in half an hour as she was very busy at the moment! Bollocks to that, I'll try another day.
Picked up brother and decided to go for a snazzy shirt and black velvet trousers for a change instead of the normal 'zany' t-shirt when we went out that night. Went to one local bar/club where I was asked for photo id! At my age it's rare to be asked for that but apparently it was for health & safety regulations, which I think is a load of rubbish. I could understand it if they quickly scanned everyones id so they had a record of who was in that night but I can't see how it would be needed for H&S. Grabbed a few drinks there but there wasn't much going down. At one point I went to the toilet and this shaven headed chav walked past and as he did turned to his mate and said 'you can tell he's gay'. It was so blatant that at first I thought he couldn't possibly be talking about me. I didn't make an issue of it but he was standing not far away when I returned to the others and it kind of riled me up. It did the same to my brother when I told him so we decided to move on.
We'd noticed that the club I'd got barred from didn't have the bouncer on the door that had 'barred me' so we decided to try in there. I chatted to the owner who knows me by surname and he didn't seem to have a problem with me. I explained what had happened and he said the guy was his head bouncer, hadn't mentioned it to him but was very good at remembering faces. We moved downstairs and it was ok but there wasn't that 'vibe' in the air. Left a good half hour before the place closed, walking right past the head bouncer who 'remembered faces'. Said goodnight to him and he wished us well so I guess he's forgotten me, which is quite handy.
The usual crap on Sunday of washing, tidying etc. I managed to catch most of the Falklands War memorial service. We really do these kind of things well. Both from the spectacle and parade style. It was mainly set on Horse Guards Parade and they set up this stage in the shape of the islands which was pretty cool. The ceremony was intercut with two pieces. One from a Royal Marine and the other a wife of a paratrooper killed in action at Goose Green who went to the Falkland Islands. The wife met up with two female islanders, one who was just a kid when they were freed when the Paras re-took Goose Green. The women explained how they hoped they'd lived their life to make this woman's husband sacrifice worthwhile and how very grateful they were of the bravery of the armed forces. The two women hugged each other with tears in their eyes and the emotion of it made me cry. It wasn't false, there wasn't any music overlaid to 'make' you feel upset but rather the sincere outpourings of two women united by the death of one, of many men. It was probably one of the most genuinely moving things I've seen all year.
Watched Lewis Hamilton win his second back to back Grand Prix races in Indianapolis. The guy is truly amazing isn't he, though I thought the scenes of the rap producer Pharrel trying to align himself with him rather opportunistic. Granted I'm sure he could take Lewis to some awesome parties but hearing him talk about how he admires Lewis in following his dreams, proving that anything is possible and wanting to help him push forward his brand kind of stuck in my throat. Would you be as impressed if he were white I wonder?
Finished the night by going to see Fantastic Four : Rise of the Silver Surfer, which I really enjoyed. Obviously after reading so many other reviews of a weak script etc I must be brain dead but I liked the story and the characters. The four main characters are likeable, do actually work together as a proper team and aren't constantly bemoaning their lot in life and the curse of their superpowers. I found the humour entertaining, I loved the scene where Reed stood up to the major and defended his nerdiness. Who wouldn't want a girlfriend/fiance/wife to say "I'm so hot for you right now" after standing up to a bully? Being freed from the over wrought drama and continual 'damsel in distress' shit that fills the Spiderman series made this a considerably more enjoyable experience.
I've not read the comics so I can't comment on the Galactus representation issue but as a newbie I found it worked. I also like the issues of sacrifice and bravery that the film used, particularly in the satisfying final action scene. Films, especially comic book ones, are meant to be visually entertaining and it more than delivered on this. Great action sequences, cool characters and good ideas.
On a final note what is happening to Stan Lee's ego? Can't he see the damaging impact that his woefully lame and intrusive cameos have on the flow of his movies.
On the way home stopped in again at the police station. It must have been close on 1.00am but I was determined to get it done and out of the way. The policeman on duty was ridiculously pleasant, even seeming to sympathise with my plight. We talked about cars and when he discovered what car it was that I drove thought maybe that was why I got pulled. He told me what car he had and another copper came up to say how he'd got three points on his license only a week ago. I was really quite surprised. It's so much easier to think of all of them as arseholes but meet a couple of nice ones and it starts to make you question your thoughts on them. Of course there is a difference between someone bored on the graveyard shift and a lonely traffic cop patrolling in his car.
Thanks for stopping by, talk soon.
Exploding toilets and great motorsport - 11/06/07
It was another quiet week in the office, meaning we did some client work but there was time for a fair chunk of internet surfing. I'd talked with my work colleagues about how frustrated I was with sorting out holiday finances. I'm not too keen on travellers cheques as there's normally a small commission when getting them plus the potential of being stuffed on the exchange rate. I know everyone says that you can exchange them anywhere but I was told this when I went to Canada and it wasn't the case. The last thing I want is to be lumbered with needing to go to a bank. American Express do a travellers card where you can load it up with money but again there is commission involved, the exchange rate is not fantastic and I don't trust Amex that I won't be charged everytime I make a transaction.
Just take your normal card I hear you shouting at the monitor. Unfortunately my bank like to charge for making foreign transactions and nothing annoys me the more than the thought of having to pay to simply spend my own money. Out of pure frustration my work colleagues suggested I try Nationwide. I've banked with the same bank, ok post office, since I've had money, much to the laughter of my colleagues. So I looked into Nationwide and it's true. There is no charge on using the card for foreign transactions. They don't even charge you if you draw money from an ATM, which almost everyone does. I was suspicious though. They must make their money from somewhere so maybe it's the exchange rate that the transactions go through at. I called them, confident I would ruin their scam only to be told that it goes through Visa, like all Visa related transactions do, and thus it is Visa not Nationwide that set the exchange rate. A quick check on Visa and their exchange is practically the same as the currency markets rate. Outstanding.
So basically using Nationwide there is no fee, I can spend what ever I want on my card without being charged and I'm getting a better exchange rate than I would if I bought currency. Wonderful. Needless to say I've applied for one to take care of the holiday money. Naturally I will be taking currency as well as I will need some dollars to tuck in the barmaids tops when I tell them to 'get themselves something pretty'!
Managed to get in some swimming on Monday and it was good to be back though I'm not making any claims of 'I'm back for good'. It takes a lot of effort and it will be a slog to get in shape for Orlando. My mate eventually watched and returned the South Korean war film Brotherhood and I decided to watch it again that night. Such a good film with battle scenes that are as easily as good as Saving Private Ryan and a lot more ferocious. It's a little bit more sentimental than most films but I've noticed this seems to be the case with films from SE Asia. Either way the music, combined with themes of courage, sacrifice and brotherly love (a cause close to my heart) did lead to the shedding of a tear or two.
During the week the toilet in the office overflowed. Basically one of our work neighbours has been tipping the fat and oil from the cooking that they do down the sink. They've also then been simply dumping the multitude of cans behind a wooden screening that fools no one, literally feet from the front door. The laziness of them not properly disposing of their shit incenses me and I did phone the council about a year ago to report them. Needless to say the council did bugger all to act on the actions of concerned citizens. Anyway behind the arches are some local football courts and this week they started to have the drains backing up over them. Oh, I wonder where the blockage could have come from? What could have caused it? Well the council sent round a team to clear the drains who proceeded to pump water down them at a pressure of about 4,000 psi to clear any blockage.
In typical sod's law fashion for people and a company that does things by the book whose toilet is it that suffers the effects. Yes ours. I was chatting to a work colleague when at the same time we both detected a rancid stench. There was a moment when we kinda looked at each other thinking 'was that you'. In seconds the stench got worse and we realised no one man could have produced something that vile. We thought it was the drains until we went to the toilet and discovered the toilet floor soaking in foul smelling water and it dripping off the walls. Basically this pressure had forced all the water and resulting smell up through our toilet. Thank god no one was sitting on it at the time. With colleagues who like to take at least 2-4 craps a day there was a real chance that it could have given someone at worst colonic irrigation and at best a bidet like tickle.
This smell was something else. A pungent mixture of off mushrooms, spilt milk, rotten sausages, mouldy eggs and eye watering onion. There was no choice but for us to evacuate for a good 30 minutes and let the air get in to remove the smell. P bravely volunteered to clean it out and we filled the toilet with a host of smells, toilet duck, bleach, air freshener and even a dash of Lynx body deodorant.
I also got round to ordering the attraction tickets. Phoned for prices from attraction tickets direct ATD) and even got them to come down a little bit on the price. There was a little worry when another ticket agency said that if booking the all inclusive Discovery Cove resort then one of the party had to do the dolphin swim. Neither of us wanted to do it. I would love to swim with dolphins but not in a group of six where you don't really feel special and you are crowding round the poor thing. Anyway this didn't apply if booking through ATD, so I got tickets for Disney, Universal, Discovery Cove, SeaWorld, Busch Gardens, Kennedy Space centre and the dinner shows Medieval Times and Dolly Parton's Dixie Stampede. I'll wait for my Nationwide card and then I can order the Boggy Creek Airboat Tour direct along with Disney's Hoop Dee Doo Revue dinner show and then we are all done. Everything after that is spending money and preparation.
It felt pretty cool to be honest and added another layer of 'yep, this is really going to happen'. As we were quiet, I did a bit more research, tinkered a little more with the day planner itinerary and added a little colour to it.
Hit the pool again on Thursday night. I managed 60 lengths which pleased me and then got the bottom half of my trousers wet when the obviously blind attendant was spraying the floor down and it went under the bottom of the cubicle. By the time I'd pulled on a t-shirt to kindly ask if she could stop soaking my calves and ankles she had moved on. In a show of rebellion I turned the tap off to her hose when I left. She was at the other end of the changing area so the inconvenience of her having to come back was a fair exchange for my wet trousers I thought.
Question Time was on that night. I used to watch this a lot when younger but became so disillusioned with how all the panellists seemed to say the same thing. No one it seemed had the courage to voice, or intelligently argue, a differing opinion. On this evening though the Daily Mail columnist Melanie Phillips was on the panel and she was amazing. Not necessarily for her opinions, all of which I happened to agree with, but rather her gusto in debating her opinion. She didn't need to interrupt or raise her voice but made her points in a considered and thoughtful manner. When challenged on her views, and at one point heckled, she stood fast and stated her case. She was fantastic and I felt compelled to drop her an email to let her know this.
People nowadays are so terrified of expressing an opinion for fear that someone might disagree. Politicans want to remain as 'vanilla' as possible to not offend and dissuade voters and celebrities are constantly in fear of negative press. Is it any wonder in this climate that a mood of utter apathy would then spread through people. I love discussing topics that rile me up and have an opinion on almost everything. I'm sure you've already gathered this from my other pages on this site!
During the week my brother heard on the grapevine that a trailer for I am Legend was going to be released on the Friday. I've always been fascinated by, and enjoyed, the thought of apocalyptic stories. I don't know if it's the notion of being released from society's boundaries, not having to tow the line or being judged anymore for what you do and don't have but the idea of being alone, or one of a few left, on Earth really excites me. Along with Stephen King's The Stand, I am Legend must be one of my favourite 'last man on earth' type stories. It was written by Richard Matheson and came out in the 50's helping to inspire a raft of related fiction from I'm sure the Stand right through to directly the Omega man and indirectly the Day of the Dead.
The film stars Will Smith and I was initially worried that it might go down the road of Independance Day but the trailer was excellent in giving a good indication of the films mood. It won't be a like for like adaptation of the book and I'm ok with that. I love the novel but I don't want to see a carbon copy of it on the screen. As long as the subject matter is handled with respect and not dragged down to PG rated tosh then I am more than happy to see their intepretation of the book. You can see the trailer at apple.com/trailers and I'd recommend doing so.
I love the music, how it seems to show the virus starting out (which the book didn't really), the scenes of a desolate New York and Will with the dog. I hope they feature the dog properly. So many films have to have a token love or child interest that it would be refreshing to see the relationship of an adult and animal. There were grumbles on IMDB that the character of Neville shouldn't be black but his colour isn't integral to the film and it is a fictional character. There will, or should be, long periods of time when the whole story will be on the lead actors shoulders so I think you need someone with screen magnetism. Will has that aplenty in my book.
My brother has started driving lessons and as I couldn't get him insured to drive mine on the roads even as a learner, we went up to the carpark in Bluewater late on Friday night. He'd had one lesson with an instructor and my hope was just to let him practice what he'd learnt rather than try to confuse him with more teaching. He took to it quite well. I hadn't realised that he hadn't really learnt finding the biting point and pulling away but once he stopped thinking about it and started just doing it, he was excellent. It was entertaining fun and I hope really helpful for him in his quest to be a driver.
Hit the gym on Saturday for another blast. I even managed 1100 calories this time which represented 5 km on the running machine, 6 miles on the bike (don't ask me why they are in different measurements) and I don't know what on the cyclic machine. I don't exactly know what function it is my eyebrows perform but it certainly isn't preventing the sweat going in them because again they felt tired and a little sore. I know I could wipe it away but it's like a badge of honour when you are working and genuinely encourages you to push even harder to sweat even more. Got a few bits of shopping before returning home via the DVD shop.
Brother and I then faced the eternal dilemma. We were both feeling a little tired but do we push on and go out locally for a few beers or save a little cash and energy and stay in. If you stay in, your mind taunts you with images of how on this night you would have stumbled across a bevy of buxom beauties and had the night of your life. Seriously consider going out and your mind reminds you of all the nights when nothing has happened and you might as well have been invisible. You then start trying to second guess the timings to work out the proximity to pay day and how many people might be out and also if having been hot all day more girls are likely to be at all day BBQ's. It sounds silly to base whether you go out on the movement patterns of women but if my brother and I are happy in each others company wherever we are then this is basically the sole motivation for going out. Don't get us wrong we aren't players and I'm not very adept at the chat up as you know but it's always nice to believe that there might be possibilities on a night out.
After much thought and consideration we decided to say 'fuck it' and stay in. I'd got a couple of DVD's for us to watch and the ingredients of a Spag Bol. As you already will know it was awesome but this time I cooked it with 750g of mince instead of 500g and it is the way forward. I still put in onions and mushrooms but the ratio of meat was higher and boy did it work. Coupled with the cream which is so the coup de grace, it really is my signature dish. If only I could regularly cook it for women on say the second or third date I'm sure they would be falling into bed with me shortly afterwards! This would only be because they were so stuffed and had immediately lost the ability to remain awake as their stomach struggled for energy to consume it. Imagine though if they didn't like? Well, I'd just have to leave immediately wouldn't I?
The first film we watched was the The Host. At last it had been in and the previous person had returned it when they were supposed to. It's a South Korean film with subtitles and was refreshingly different. It's about this mutated fish/thing that exists in the Han river in
We followed this with Gridiron Gang, a film based on a true story about a young offenders institue that builds an American football team. My brother and I like our fair share of American football films (Remember the Titans, Friday night lights etc) and this had a lot of similar cliches. It starred The Rock, who we both like, and it was an entertaining romp. What looked the most fascinating was the clips at the end of the film from the original documentary that must have inspired the film. In it you saw the actual guy that The Rock played uttering almost the same lines for real that he had. Two good films and an entertaining evening. There was still the smidgen of regret that maybe we'd missed a great night but you never know do you?
Sunday was the MotoGP from Catalunya in
It was truly blistering excitement and as we approached the final few laps I braved myself for Rossi's final few laps onslaught that he always pulls. Stoner wonderfully responded to the pressure, soaked it up and remained in the lead to cross the finish line in first place. Easily the most exciting race of the season and just confirmed my thoughts from last season that Stoner was a guy who was prepared to fight for victories. Normally when Rossi is behind someone with a few more laps to go there is an inevitability that he will pass and win once again but Stoner has some backbone and as strong a desire to win as Rossi does.
This was followed in the afternoon by the Canadian F1. Lewis Hamilton whose record so far has been nothing short of astonishing (5 races - one 3rd place and four consecutive 2nd places) qualified on pole for the first time. In a difficult, incident packed race that had no less that five occasions when the safety car came out he remained cool and unflappable and won his first race. Truly amazing. I know he's been groomed by Ron Dennis and is in the current top form team but his speed and maturity is very impressive. He's clean cut, intelligent, good looking, polite and hungry for success. He's a marketeers wet dream and I wish him continued success.
Went out that night to see Oceans 13. It was ok. Entertaining for the two hours but far from memorable. It was nice to see some shots of
As I've been typing this up I've been constantly listening to Voyage, voyage by Desireless. This song came out in the mid 80's and I remember was a song that I loved. At a time when I didn't have much money it was a single I remember buying and playing endlessly at both 45 and 33 rpm, which seemed to be something I did at the time to get two versions from the same song!. It was a big hit in Europe and even made it to No 3 in the UK which was even more impressive for being a French language song. At the same time I think was also just discovering Jean Michel Jarre and his brilliant Rendevous album. One of the few times in my life when I've loved the French! It's such a catchy tune with a really strong backing track and even now sounds really classy and fresh. Check out the original and best version, which seems ridiculously hard to buy now, here
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x231r_desireless-voyage
Right oh. Signing off until the next time.
I just couldn't wait - 4/06/07
I tried waiting but it was no good. After confirmation that it wouldn't ruin the film and the return to the office of a work colleague who also hadn't seen the second trailer, I watched the Transformers trailer. Wow, it left me charged to the max. It just looks so cool. It was dramatic but not predictable and some of the action scenes and transformations looked wicked. The attention to detail with all the little cogs etc when the robots change and how the sound effects are layered so your ear can detect all these subtle nuances is fantastic.
At one point a character called Starscream I believe jumps in the air as a robot, backflips and then as he does transforms into this F-15 or F-22 and blasts off. Other scenes show missiles flying around, bad robots chasing combat soldiers, two robots fighting and a building series of shots combined with an increasingly tense background score. I felt like someone had delivered a shot of adrenaline to my heart and easily confirmed that this was my most eagerly awaited film of the year. I'm sure it will disappoint and the story not be as satisfying as I would like but if it just delivers the kind of action scenes and mind bending change sequences that the trailer indicates then I will be delirious.
After the disappointment of the early blockbusters, Spidey 3 and Pirates of the Caribbean (that I can't even be bothered to see) I think we could be in for a couple of good ones; Fantastic Four 2, Die Hard 4, Transformers, Bourne Ultimatum and the end of the year, I am Legend, with Will Smith. Hopes are high for this final one but confidence not so at this stage.
I've been a little behind with updating my journal but I've not really had a great deal happening. I guess you have months where there seems to be a fair chunk going on and others where there is isn't. On Friday I got a circular email from FHM that happened to mention the release of a Rambo 4 trailer. Surely not, it hadn't been filming for long I thought. At most we thought it might just be a collection of scenes from earlier films but it was over three minutes of footage.
It shows John Rambo minding his own business in the jungles of SE Asia and some missionaries wanting to borrow his boat. John looks resigned and reserved as ever but when they are captured he reverts to type and kicks some major arse. I thought that after the success of Rocky Balboa this might be a more muted affair but credit to him for not toning it down, because this was very violent. Beheadings, throat rips and firing a truck mounted .50 calibre machine gun into the trucks cabin reducing the occupant to bloody chunks. If that wasn't enough to get one excited we had the killer line "when pushed, killing's as easy as breathing". It won't be out until 2008 but I look forward to seeing John's exploits.
Had an awesome pasta dish on Friday night. Following on from a method of cooking some mushrooms the previous week I fried some onions in a little garlic scented virgin olive oil. While they browned, I fried some small pieces of chicken breast in another pan, also in the scented virgin oil, and in a saucepan browned some mushrooms in butter. When all the elements were brown I tipped everything, including the oil, into the mushroom saucepan and stirred. This thickened into this lovely sauce that was made even better by adding a pot of double cream and some chopped parsley. In the meantime I boiled up some pasta. It was like spaghetti but was hollow and twirled into twists. It certainly looked different. When cooked it was added to the creamy mushroom, chicken and onion sauce and heated over the hob. Served on a plate with some grated cheese over the top and it was fantastic.
Initial thoughts were that it looked disappointing, especially as I'd toyed with using tagliaterre, but the hollow nature of the pasta in a way seemed to absorb the creaminess of the sauce and it really was great. It left such a wonderful after-taste that although I wanted to eat more, I felt I didn't have to. Jonathan Ross was good that night. He had Bear Grylls on who seems such a nice bloke. He was in the SAS but he didn't even mention it and is so modest. His shows are some of the best things on TV and they showed a clip from his forthcoming series where in an attempt to demonstrate how you can get moisture from the unlikeliest of sources, he squeezed a freshly laid elephant shit above his head for the liquid to run out and into his mouth!
Saturday was a lovely day weather wise and on the way to the hairdressers there were a fair few sights to behold/enjoy. When the weather is like this it's easier to picture what it will be like in Orlando and at least adds to the motivation for losing a few pounds. Headed onto Bluewater to pick up brother and have a look around. There was some nice stuff in JD sports. Some cool 3/4 lengths and t-shirts but here is the dilemma with Orlando. It's natural to want to buy stuff for your hols but with a trip to Premium Outlets and it's Nike, Gap and Adidas stores pencilled in for the first afternoon it seems foolish to get items beforehand. Of course with this though it means by the time I come back to the UK it will be too cold to wear any of these new clothes!
My brother got himself a t-shirt from French Connection after he'd finished work. It was a transformers one but not a cheesy one but rather grey material with a black line drawing of this robot running down the left hand side with this white Japanese writing laid over the top. When he put it on to go out that night he was a little frustrated by the shortness of the sleeves and worried that they made him look gay. Far from it. Over the course of the evening I decided it was the coolest t-shirt that he owns. It was a lot more classy than one you might imagine and being a little more snug in the fit only made him look a little bigger.
Went into town that night and found a bar near the Old Vic theatre in the Waterloo area. It was a nice place and had a large terrace but was full of annoying luvvie twats. Most of them seemed either lacking in manners (pushing infront at the bar) or lacking in spatial awareness (repeatedly pushing into us while they were conversing with their comrades). There was however one lovely looking woman there. She had shoulder length hair and an exquisite face. The cleavage revealing split design of her top helped but I confess that I was more enchanted by her face. She was surrounded by a bunch of arses and naturally oblivious to my presence. From here we moved onto another bar that although looking quite cool was only about a 1/4 full.
Headed over to Blackheath where we hooked up with some female friends. It was a nice night and there was some fun and laughter but although there was a gaggle of women further along the dance floor I couldn't really see them as I was being continually blinded by the disco lights!
Sunday was the MotoGP in Mugello. The race started off exciting enough but Rossi worked his way to the front after about 10 laps with Pedrosa behind but he looked like he had little chance of over-taking him. I know it's wrong but it was clear that Rossi would win and having seen more than my fair share of race wins and the over zealous, post race Rossi adulation, I turned it off even before it had finished. Headed over to the gym, as I hadn't been on the Saturday and it was even quieter than normal. Gave it a good go and managed to nail out 1050 calories. I try not to set myself targets as I then find myself trying to beat them the next time I go, which almost acts as a dis-incentive. I sweated so much that it stung my eyes and seemed to lead to increased sleepy men production that night.
Watched Small Soldiers that night on the TV. Such a clever film with so many great lines and scenes. Some of the ingenuity used to create weapons out of household appliances is just brilliant. You also can't help but love the cuteness of the Gorgonites. The big one's voice, who says at the end "I hope we don't hit an iceberg" manages to generate a lump at the back of my throat almost everytime he speaks.
Short entry this time I'm afraid. Hope you have a good one.
Something Lost and something re-discovered - 28/05/07
Was chatting to one of my clients on Monday about my forthcoming trip to Orlando. It seemed he was an Orlando expert having been there at least four times. His first visit when he was 17 was to the very hotel that we were booked in to stay at. Amazing. We got chatting and he suggested that although it sounded controlling it was worth drawing up a day planner and that I try to insert rest days every couple of days. I can't remember if I've mentioned on here that I've been doing this very thing. Ok I'm a bit OCD but some of the things we intend to do need to be booked in for specific dates so we need a timetable to work towards.
I told him how I'd already knocked up the very things with the inclusion of rest days every third or fourth day. Great minds think alike. He sent me a link to a Japanese restaurant that he particularly liked and was literally a stones throw from our hotel. The site had a google map which also gave me the chance to look at a satellite map and actually see the hotel. Even better was the fact that the Japanese restaurant was in the same complex as Hooters. Meaning of course that Hooters will be just a short walk away. Naturally this doesn't mean that just because I can walk there means I'm expecting to 'pull' a bevy of Hooter honey's and get them back to our penthouse suite. Rather it's just good to know that as this is where we always intended to go on our first night (purely of course for the wings, which are meant to be very good) we won't have to go far to do so.
Talking to someone who had a similar level of enthusiasm only served to ramp my excitement up considerably and sparked a fresh round of research, which is never a bad thing. I don't think I'm going mad but there is nothing worse than going all the way out there, on a holiday of a lifetime and then grinding to a halt because we don't know what to do next.
The second Transformers trailer was released this week. I was very keen to see it but concerned that if I did, they would include so many key moments that it would ruin the film when I go and see it. I'm trying to do the same with the Fantastic Four sequel. I was happy to show it to my brother and work colleagues who it seemed to blow away and really impress. They suggested I watch it as it didn't seem to give anything away but I'm not sure. It's downloaded and sitting on my desktop so we will see how long I can last.
Some other clients were having a leaving do on the Thursday which we attended. It was a nice night weather wise and everyone seemed to congregate in the sizeable beer garden. It was good fun and nice to see the faces of some people that I've either spoken to on the phone or emailed. The three of us didn't really get a chance to grab anything to eat prior to the evening do so had to make do with a quick pit stop into a McDonalds on the way home. We decided to try some of the chunky chips that are part of their current campaign and I have to say that they were pretty fine. Even at the late time that I hit the Blackwall Tunnel coming home that night, which must have been around 11.30, it was screwed up with some problem and just continues to re-inforce my worst conspiracy theories about it.
Saturday night and brother and I decided we would head out as M was at a wedding. We thought about going local but I remembered that my brother hadn't been to the Venue in New Cross and that maybe he should at least see it. We quickly checked that our neighbour could run us up there and collect us later, which he could and got ourselves ready. We finished off the remains of the 89.9% Absinthe along with a couple of Reef's each.
Got dropped off in New Cross at around 9.00ish and grabbed a beer in a nearby bar. It was pretty grubby and worryingly not that busy. Some band were meant to come on later but in the meantime we were entertained by this hooded knob who was on stage with his Apple laptop. He told us how the tunes were available to download from his myspace page indicating that they'd obviously been pre-recorded. Nothing wrong with that of course but it did make his remaining on stage and randomly moving his finger over the mousemat whilst staring intently at the screen all the more pointless.
Moved next door into the Venue at about 10.30. It wasn't as busy as we'd hoped but it gave us a chance to have a good look round. From when I last went in there, they've spent a fair bit of cash on it. The bar on the ground floor as you walk in still looks the same, like something out of a Harvester restaurant though it had been cleaned up. I'd only ever hit downstairs very briefly and this almost felt Spanish like with terracotta coloured walls etc. We moved up to the main dance floor which having just opened was virtually empty. I can't remember ever having seen the dance floor etc and it looked new enough that I considered whether they had re-laid it. The carpet certainly had been replaced as it no longer looked or felt like you were walking through a treacle like swamp. On the next floor up was another bar with a viewing gallery that circled the main floor and was dotted with comfortable leather sofas.
The best was reserved for the top floor. This used to be the domain of the grungers, dark lights and rock/metal music yet now it looked like something out of a Vegas nightclub. There was new wood everywhere. The floor and walls were sculpted to almost give the look of a space age capsule, there were these little cubicles and areas that you could sit within close to the dance floor and a good scattering of leather sofas. The bar was more of this glorious wood and it wasn't let down by the lighting either. Even the toilets were clean and tidy with split lavatory rooms for girls and boys but a central, combined area for people to wash their hands.
It felt a million miles away from New Cross and the Venue that I used to know. We headed back downstairs to watch the Beatles tribute band in the main floor who were pretty good. We had a good time and a particularly energetic session on the main dance floor at one point when the DJ was dropping some awesome 80's classics. There was no female interaction though. Although there were a few girls dotted around, the place wasn't rammed and neither of us saw anyone that caught our eye, or vice versa. It's a shame because it is just the perfect place if you were to start chatting to someone or went along with a couple of girls on a second/third date. There are so many little cubby holes and places to go and have a chat or maybe a cuddle! If there was a group of you that were having a laugh, the separate areas on the top floor would just be ideal. The club actually goes on until 4.30 but we left at around 2.20. It was good to see it's improvements and I think a re-visit will have to be on the cards soon.
The next day we were over at P's. It was time for some more Lost though it wasn't until we were about two episodes in that we realised it was the series finale that night. Forewarned with that knowledge, it seemed to intesify the watching experience. We started the day with a couple of hamburgers whilst watching the Monaco F1. This was one of the best burgers I've had in a long time and if I'd been served it in a restaurant I would have been very happy. Alonso won the grand prix but Hamilton was behind him all the way and I really don't think it will be long before he gets his first Grand Prix victory.
Spoilers Ahead:
Lost built to quite a rousing finale. Granted they still had some annoying conveniences in the script, Juliet was her usual lying self and did make me a little angry that the people kept being so trusting and willing to be duped by her. They also telegraphed the whole 'hearing someone get shot over a radio but in reality the gun was fired into the ground and no one was killed' device. The final act was quite clever in that it sold you a little red herring into believing that we were seeing a flashback of Jack being haggard and depressed. His stumbling looking round hospitals and contemplating suicide was intercut with him leading his people up a mountain on the island to make a distress call using a satellite phone from a recently downed helicopter pilot. Whilst he was doing this Charlie was trying to unblock the jamming device that Ben and his 'others' had set up to stop people broadcasting off the island though Desomd had warned him that he would die doing this.
Charlie switched off the jamming device but still died and Jack made the call. At this point you still don't believe they will make it. It's the series finale, it has to be ambigious and with at least another two series to go they won't be ruining it now will they? You then see a little more of the flashbacks and realise that they are in fact flash forwards as Jack talks about how he wishes he was back on the island, where he was someone of use and importance and how he keeps using the gold pass that the airline gave them to fly back over the ocean in the hope that it might crash and he could be back there. Quite clever really and at least it gave you something to mull over until early 2008 when the next series returns.
Finally this was followed with UFC where Chuck Liddell was facing up against the one man who had beaten him, whose defeat he hadn't avenged. Clinton 'rampage' Jackson. My brother is a lot more into UFC than me and we'd been looking forward to seeing what happened in this showstopper. They both came out swinging but Quinton caught him with an absolute peach, flush on the jaw, which sent Chuck flailing to the ground. Rampage jumped and started pummeling and the moment Chuck relaxed, the ref finished the fight. It was quite a turn up as Chuck was the clear favourite but I think things like this can only be good for keeping the excitement and unpredictability of the events.
Monday and my brother was back at work so I carried out the usual boring tasks after which I sat down and watched Titanic again. My feelings for this film, as I've detailed in my review of it, still stand of it being a great film. It's hugely entertaining, involving and never feels like a 3 hour film. I also listened to James Cameron's commentary as well as seeing the alternate ending. Thank god they didn't go with that and James realised the thrust of the story was with Rose and Jack and not the salvager and the heart of the ocean diamond. James' commentary is very illuminating and there is also an additional cast and crew commentary plus a historian based commentary. It sounds geeky (what doesn't on this site!) but it's my all time favourite film so the level of interest would naturally be the highest.
Hit the pictures that night to see the film Zodiac. I read this had been descibed as another Seven as it was by the same director, David Fincher. Because of this and my fear of deducing plot spoilers I refrained from watching any trailers of the film and entered the cinema unaware of what it would entail.
As it had done with 28 weeks later the opening trailers started with the edges of the screen set in from the edge of the screen. Fearing that this would continue into the film I collared a worker and asked him to rectify it. He gave me the same old bullshit that they had last time about how some films weren't made for widescreen. I wasn't getting cross with him but I did have to say that that was crap and question how in over 25 years of going to the pictures I had never (apart from 28 weeks later) seen a film that had been cropped from the edges. I asked him to check with the projectionist or someone which he must have done because when the film started it had returned to full screen.
As for the film. Well, it was interesting and it did show how long and frustrating investigations can take into some serial killers but it wasn't that exciting. When you start to become aware of how uncomfortable the seats are, the surprising lack of padding on your arse and how the second amount of chewing gum you've popped in is beginning to lose it's flavour, you realise something is up. This was basically a long crimewatch re-enactment made for the big screen. Ok it was informative and I didn't regret seeing it but it certainly wasn't the edge of the seat thriller with a killer twist that Seven was. Indeed how any critic could ever compare this to Seven is beyond me.
Thanks for tuning in and apologies for the delay in the posting.
Halo disappointment and a couple of good films - 21/05/07
A quiet-ish week really. I seemed busy at work though there wasn't anything major to report. Seemed to be playing catch up with my journal and some emails that I needed to send. Bungie, the company behind Halo, released the Beta multiplayer version of Halo 3 this week. Quite a marketing coup really. Less than a month or so after the PS3 came out and they release a trial version of the multiplayer part of the game for people to play online and get their thoughts and comments on.
I haven't got online because I'm worried that if I succumb to being online at home that I will descend into weekends off wearing pants, eating crap (ok even more than normal!) and never, ever leaving the house. If my brother and mates coupled up and never came out then maybe it would be a fall back option but until then it's Pandora's Box that needs to remain firmly closed. Anyway it didn't stop me checking out some of the videos that IGN had posted up of it and it looks pretty damn cool. The graphics don't look like a huge leap forward from Halo 2, which is a little disappointing, but apparently the gameplay is lots of fun. It's great to see the Assault Rifle back, my favourite weapon from the first one but cruelly dropped by Bungie for the second one. There are also some new tricks with a portable shield (bubble grenade) along with the ability to pick up heavy machine guns and move them to other locations. A great idea that my brother had only recently been discussing would be cool to do.
My enthusiasm was suitably stoked until Bungie then told us the release date for Halo 3. They had said it would be the Fall of 2007, which I always thought meant would be October / November. Unfortunately though they said it will be the 25th September which is when my brother and I will be away in the states. I have to say that I was a little disappointed.
I love the Halo universe. I own all the books, the graphic novel, all three albums, traded my PS2 to get the Xbox purely for Halo and bought the special edition of the second game. I helped my brother buy an Xbox so he could play it on the same day in the living room, whilst I was playing in the bedroom, to ensure that we had our own individual single player experiences but could still talk about it at selected intervals, normally in the kitchen over a quick cuppa. I even remember first becoming aware of the game in a copy of Edge when it was first mooted for the Mac and aroused enough interest to be tucked away at the back of my mind.
The wait for Halo 2 was delicious and naturally my excitement has been bubbling for Halo 3. I really enjoy the shared anticipation as the day draws closer, the titbits of info that we get and the discussing of it's arrival with members of other forums I visit. I watched the Halo 3 trailer in the office with my colleagues on the day it came out, loved the starry night commercial and have already lined myself up to buy the Legendary edition of Halo 3.
Needless to say the fact that I will miss the build up and first play is a little gutting. I know it will be going on but being a bloke I can't multi task and thus wanted to focus my excitement purely on the holiday and then get excited about the launch of Halo 3 a month or so later.
You know seeing the first TV adverts for it, seeing the first hoarding for it on a bus, self censoring the reviews to get a feel for the reviewers thoughts but not enough info to spoil the game, chatting about it with all and sundry, stock piling all the best crisps, sweets, drinks, pizza menus etc for those first few days of gaming heaven and basically doing my bit to add to it's launch day fervour. I guess it will be exciting to see how the marketing is handled in the states as we thought the advertising in the UK for Halo 2 could have been better but it will feel like discussing the best party in the world for weeks beforehand only to arrive when the lights have gone up and people are beginning to clear things away.
I know it's only a game, I'm not saying I'm contemplating cancelling the holiday or anything and this is all said in a light hearted tone. In reality you don't get that many things to get really excited about in a year and it's just unfortunate that like two buses coming along at the same time, both of these genuine highlights happen to horribly clash.
I wouldn't ask Bungie to put the release date back as that would be out of order to everyone else and I'm sure release dates aren't based purely on the holiday patterns of a few English geeks. I would just say to them that if they were to suddenly discover some little glitch or some cool new feature that needed a few extra weeks to fix/add then they've got two huge fans here who would more than understand.
I went on the bungie forums to discuss my thoughts, effectively posting what's above, and bar one or two comments got flamed and criticised for complaining. Unfortunately many seemed unable to read what I'd written or detect the humour in it. I wasn't complaining per se, just discussing how in my own circumstances the timing was a real bummer.
Did more research on Orlando and managed to nail out the day planner. It isn't set in stone but having a rough framework does help you to co-ordinate when you think you might be able to do stuff. Found some decent looking nightclubs including one on a Saturday that is both a 'Ladies night' with discounted drinks and an 80's night. Could there be a better scenario?
The rest of the week was pretty uneventful. It was P's first week back in the office with Biscuit and she settled in reasonably well. Yes there was still little wee's and pooh's around the office but she is still very young and house/office training her will, I'm sure, take time.
Hired out a couple of DVD's for Friday night but by the time I got in and had some tea with my brother it was too late to start them. Hence Saturday morning-ish and I was plonked in front of the telly with some tea and toast and the first film. I really should watch more films at this time because I was wide awake and taking everything in but it's quite natural to leave a film to be your 'tentpole' piece of entertainment for the evening. This normally means that in a 'saving the best to last' tradition I end up leaving it so late that I'm almost falling asleep when it's playing.
Anyway first up we had Pan's Labyrinth. It's a Spanish language film by Guillermo del Toro, he of Blade II and Hellboy fame. I was always disappointed with Hellboy but respected the attention and dedication that he lavished on the production and thus have always been keen to see this film. It's a strange one really. It's a film about a young girl discovering a fantasy world in a truly dark time. It's set during the Spanish civil war and some of the treatment meted out by the Spanish is so barbaric you wonder if you are watching Schindlers List. I guess the idea was to make the real world so real and horrible that in a way the fantasy world was more believable. It works and was a thoroughly enjoyable film. It's subtitled but that didn't detract from the film and the characters were a lot richer and possessed more depth than any other of his films. Refreshingly different.
Next up was Smokin' Aces. I'd come close to seeing this at the pictures but the trailer looked almost so cool that when I read a few negative reviews it worked against it. I wish I'd seen it at the pictures. It was like a Guy Ritchie ensemble piece but only a lot better. There were some good names in the mix, Liotta, Garcia, Affleck and their characters although having not a great deal of exposition are pretty cool. The plot gets a little convoluted and twisty but bear with it and there are some cool set pieces, particularly involving the .50 calibre rifle being fired in anger. Burt Gummer would have been very proud of it's usage. I really enjoyed this and it was a shame that my brother was working and didn't get a chance to see it.
Dropped the DVD's back en route to the gym for a Saturday afternoon burn-up. Had some cool ASOT mixes on the Nano but it was still hard to get myself to go. Cranked out 400 cals on the running machine, then a punishing 200 cals on the bike that took me just a fraction over 20 minutes to complete. Future goal to beat there. My legs were a little wobbly after this and I went on the cyclic machine to get some blood flowing back in them. I was going to just do 200 but still felt good at 250 so decided to push onto 300. This is when male pride took over as I noticed a woman next to me was just coming up to 250 cals. I thought she might stop there but she carried on going to what I thought would be 300. I wasn't going to be matched by a girl so I thought I'd raise the bar a little higher and pushed onto 350. She hit 300 and carried on going. Goddam it, right 400 here we come. It was pathetic really but hell any kind of stimulus to keep you exercising can't be bad can it. I finished at 410, wanting to go a little over just in case her cut off was 400, and was utterly shattered. She slowed at around 375 but by this point I was so knackered she could have carried on. Overall I'd done 1000 cals, which bearing in mind my lack of attendance I was pleased with. It felt good but I'm not stupid enough to realise that it doesn't achieve anything unless I keep at it.
Hired out Will Smith's The Pursuit of Happiness that night as our attempt, once again, to watch the film The Host was thwarted by someone not returning their copy even though we had reserved it. It was ok but a lot more schmaltzy and sentimental that I'd thought it might be. I knew it would have elements of this in it, and it did reveal how horrifying it must be not having somewhere to sleep at night, but I would have preferred seeing more of Smiths rise through the ranks of the interns.
MotoGP was from LeMans this Sunday and was pretty rain soaked. It made for a good skill leveller and Chris Vermuelen of all people got Rizla Suzuki their very first 1st place with a great ride. At a circuit where Rossi was expected to be more dominant than Stoner, he ended up coming three places behind Stoner (who finished in third) which only allowed Stoner to increase his lead, bravo. Watched Seven again to round out a weekend of good movies. It is a truly cracking film with a twist ending that I never saw coming. So clever, so original and so great to see a film that isn't afraid to assume that it's audience has some form of intelligence. I listened to the commentaries over the last couple of scenes and even though there are three different ones, they are all pretty poor at handling those final scenes with the reverance they deserve.
Take care.
A little stealth, a little rush and you could win a stunning prize - 14/05/07
Back in the office on Tuesday and back to the busy-ness. Got two compliments from people who had found my website through me mentioning it on a messageboard that I've been on for a good few years. One of them said something so complimentary that I added it onto the self flagellation page if you want to check it out. Wednesday was equally busy and come the evening the Old Kent Road and A2 were completely solid due to the Blackwall Tunnel being closed. This seems to have been the third week on the trot that it has been closed for one day due to some spurious reason. This time it was due to a lorry carrying Asbestos crashing in the tunnel. I don't know but ever since they closed the tidal flow scheme that they have in the mornings (when they use one of the southbound lanes for Northbound traffic) and rumours said it was because Red Ken wanted more traffic to head into Greenwich making it easier for him to extend the congestion charge out to cover Greenwich, I've been suspicious.
My cookie dough combats turned up during the week and they look pretty cool. They aren't quite as smooth as the arctic ones but I still like them, they look a little different and are very practical. I'm now looking like the consumate military obsessed, middle aged, wannabe soldier, loner twat that I've been aiming for!
My brother had been working next door that day and as the traffic clearly wasn't moving we decided to head over the Indian/Nepalese for something to eat. I was keen to see what he thought of it and it was only once we were inside that he said how he'd never eaten inside an Indian restuarant before. Nothing strange in that really. I didn't go to my first one until I was about 25-26ish. That wasn't a conscious decision or anything but more that I didn't belong to the kind of group who would go out for a lashing and then end up in an Indian. Anyway it was a nice night, the food was good and I tried my first chicken Pasanda. Naturally we were going to have a chicken tikka masala but wanted to try something else. Our tastes don't go a great deal hotter but we didn't want to go as mild as a Korma. The Pasanda filled the gap nicely and tasted just as nice when dripping off a fresh, hot naan.
Headed off around 10.00ish and the traffic had begun to clear. Coming home on the A2 and I saw possibly the most dangerous, reckless and plain irresponsible piece of driving ever. The dual carriageway that I was heading home along was fine but the other side going back into town was completely rammed. With the tunnel closed people were simply having to wait and edge their way off the road and through Blackheath. Anyway as we were driving along we noticed this black Fiesta (I had to check the next day with my brother to make sure that I hadn't imagined it) driving the wrong way back through all the queuing traffic. Somehow the female driver must have done a three point turn and was driving back along the road in between the two lines of cars. She had no flashing lights, no sirens and wasn't dressed like a copper. I was outraged, who the hell did she think she was. So important that she couldn't wait like everyone else and had to pull that kind of stunt.
I assumed her intention was to get to the next turn, where I might add the traffic was still flowing, and do a sharp turn onto the exit road. That meant that as other cars approached the slip road they would see her lights pointing towards them on their side of the road. I can't believe that people let her turn round or that cars were letting her move down in between them. I would have flung my door open to prevent her stupidity. I think we need to accept a little civic responsibilty sometimes and this would have been a time to do so. If I had been coming the other way and been dazzled by her lights as I took the slip road I would have happily dragged her from the car and kerbed her for her utter selfishness and desire to put others at risk. Stupid bitch.
P brought Biscuit in on Friday to introduce her to the office and the other guys. It was good to see her again. She had certainly grown, was still as cute as I remembered and was very well behaved. We had to shoot off to a client meeting later in the afternoon which was ok but made a little fraught by me stupidly forgetting to take a pen. I had plenty in the car but none to write down notes in the meeting. Borrowed one of the other guys but that meant he couldn't then write anything down. Poor show by myself.
Up early on Saturday as the five of us were heading off to Thorpe Park. I hadn't looked on the site or anything about and to be fair thought it would be pretty pants. I've been to Chessington before and that is woeful so I didn't expect more than that. The drive was fun with a pick up of everyone en route before attempting to follow the multi-map directions that we'd printed off. I'm never keen on following these and always prefer just handing the map to someone to get us where we are going. My brother is a very capable map reader but we thought we'd give the instructions a go. Needless to say at the first junction where they told you to turn right but you couldn't because it was a no right turn they were virtually useless. In the end we just followed the signs for the M25 and worked our way to the park from there.
I was looking forward to it. You can't beat the simple thrills of some rides and it would be a nice appetiser for what we would encounter in the states. The big ride of the park is called Stealth and it's like a smaller version of the top thrill dragster at Cedar Point. It's a simple ride really. It uses magnetic propulsion to accelerate you very quickly up a 200 ft track, crest over the top and down the other side. Being the parks big ride we raced over to queue up for it once we'd got our tickets. 200 ft looked reasonable and it was incredible to think the one in Cedar Point is twice the height at 420ft (16 storeys). The queue slowly snaked it's way along and we inched ever closer. I paired off with one of the girls as I knew I wanted to sit at the front. I've got a simple philosophy when it comes to rollercoaster rides. I only get one chance to ride it for the very first time and if I'm going to queue for an age I might as well ensure that the first ride is as best as it can be. Hence why I'll wait that little bit longer to get the front seats. I know the sensations are all still there but it is so much better enjoying the swoops, turns etc of a ride when you've no one in front of you.
Queuing up in the final turns before your go when you could watch the next cars going out was a hoot. Normally coasters pull off at a clunk as they start some slow climb up a hill. Not with Stealth. With it's special form of launch you had the chance to watch people preparing themselves for the go but yet still being taken by surprise by the force of the acceleration. I joked with my fellow rider why people always screamed at these things. Couldn't you just enjoy it. The next train pulled in and I hopped into the outside seat as the cars were a traditional two by two design. The straps came down, the trepidation began to build and we watched the lights count down. Should I still being chewing gum? was my head back against the headrest? should I put my arms....................
Wham. A kick in the pants, head back into the support and we were hurtling off. The acceleration was eye wateringly, incredible and I couldn't stop whooping and hollering like an over enthusiastic cheerleader. In almost a second we were at the foot of the 200ft hill and racing up to the heavens for all it was worth. The wind was howling, the car was shaking and I was a screaming in wild exileration. It crested the top of the hill and I had a nano second to look round before it began to dip over the edge and race back down the 90º incline on the other side. It was so steep that at one point you couldn't actually see the track and you felt like you were going to hurtle down into the ground. It was over in a flash as it basically just comes down and back round behind the queue. But what a flash and what a rush. I was charged when I got off and was hungry for more. The ride had gone down equally well with the others and we headed over to Nemesis.
I was looking forward to this as it was a foot dangler coaster and I just love these ones. Seeing my feet hanging in front of me with no support as they whip through the air just gives me a killer rush. Again I queued for the front, this time with my brother, and off we went. It starts off slowly and dips down racing through a mist filled tunnel. It then starts the climb up an incline from which it swoops down pulling twists, a wickedly sharp loop-the-loop and corkscrews with gay abandon. It strays close to the ground and at one point seemingly and alarmingly close to one of the strutt like supports. As it had done in Cedar Point this one definately left me the most shook up and my legs were a little wobbly when I clambered off.
It was a particularly warm day in Thorpe Park but there were a lot of pretty girls milling around. To be honest I was surprised by how many there were. My mate said that if you think this is a lot expect at least three times the amount in the US, with a marked increase in the calibre of girls. Looks like my jaw will be dropping for more than just the rides in Florida. After this we headed over to Colossus as we had fast passes for it. Colossus is this slightly older coaster that's USP is that it offers riders 10 loops. It looks quite slow moving and tricks you into thinking that it will be quite pedestrian but it really does have a sting in it's tail. The cars were incredibly small and seemingly designed for kids but it was a fun ride and even though it's slowing by the time it hits the last few corkscrews they are still great fun purely for the fact that they are happening slower than you'd expect.
We then decided to give Slammer a go. It looked fairly innovative and the best way to describe it is it being like a see saw that is lifted into the air and then swung round through 360°s. Naturally you are strapped in at either end along with 23 other hapless fools and you get three rotations going forward and then three backwards. I didn't quite know what it would feel like but it looked cool and certainly different to the coaster rides. We decided that the back row would give the best feeling of speed and plonked ourselves there. The two girls took two seats in the front row as one of them was quite unnerved by the thought of the ride. Give her credit though for she manned up to the challenge and didn't wimp out. We did have a moment when my mates harness wouldn't secure down properly and we were unsure whether the guy would be coming back to check. Being hung upside down whilst being spun through a 360 degree rotation wouldn't be much fun it you weren't secured in!
The thing started and hydraulically lifts itself 105 feet into the air. It then starts its first revolution and it's a real rush as you feel yourself being spun over and effectively racing towards the ground before being pulled through the middle and then up the other side. Your head gets heavy, my jaw started to hurt and you find yourself holding onto the harness for dear life. Three revolutions one way and then you get to do it backwards, which is equally amazing. It's a very simple ride when you think about and I take my hat off to the inventor for creating something that in a limited amount of space delivers a real thrill.
We were getting a little hungry and decided that we would do the water rides before breaking for lunch. I wasn't going to but as the other decided to get waterproof ponchos thought I'd do likewise. I guess half the point of a water ride is the danger of getting wet so doing all you can to prevent it happening seems pretty pointless. I think we managed to find a half way house compromise between trying to prevent absolute soakage but knowing that we'd still get wet. We had another fast pass for this, the Tidal Wave, and jumped on the next available car/cart/boat? The seat was already covered in water and seeing earlier ones we knew it threw up a hell of a wave. My brother was sitting next to me with the hood of his poncho up and just as we slid down the slide I reached behind him and yanked it down. We hit the water and the wave was immense. It just didn't seem to stop raining back water on us which naturally found its way into almost every nook and cranny. We came round and disembarked from the boat thing to take the walk over to the main park.
As we did another boat made it's descent and I grabbed L who'd done her best to avoid being soaked. In what was a truly hilarious scene I held her against the railing whilst I cowered behind her as the full force of the next wave crashed over us. It's only water but it was the image of us huddled over the railing facing the whole wave which really tickled me. Credit it to her that she took it and along with M getting previously soaked when she was caught stranded by a monster wave we were all a little wet. Followed this with their river rapids style ride which was pretty tame, despite my brothers and I attempts to get the thing rocking.
We agreed that the eat all you can buffet at the on-site Pizza Hut would offer the best remedy to our rumbling stomachs. £7.49 for all you could manage food and drinks and we hit those racks hard. The pizza's were fresh and hot and they did this very tasty tomatoey penne pasta sauce. The girls gave a good account of themselves but us guys made sure that we at least broke even in what we had spent to what we ate. The heavens opened up whilst we had lunch which demonstrated spooky timing and meant that there was no need to rush our food.
With that kind of ballast on board the afternoon moved at a slightly slower pace once it stopped raining. A couple of the rides seemed to temporarily close which was initially frustrating though not unexpected for a British theme park. Managed to get another ride on Colossus, Nemesis and Stealth as well as going on a ride called Rush. It had a ridiculously slow moving queue and we questioned whether we should do it as it was basically a glorified swing. As it happens though it was quite cool and a real surprise, especially for the second or so of fright and weightlessness when you reached the apex of the full swing.
A good day in all. My face felt tired and stretched from the exposure to the wind and the sun but it was good to have done something good with the day. Thorpe Park had delivered a lot more fun than I would ever have expected it to and it bodes well for Orlando in September. Dropped the girls off and then headed over to Bluewater to try and catch a performance of 28 weeks later. It was fully booked out and we had to resort to booking tickets on the telephone for the Odeon at Greenwich. We wished we hadn't bothered for it was really poor.
It showed some promise. Some of the ideas were good and the producers had certainly spent the money getting the right uniforms, guns, props and shots of a desolated London. I have never though seen a worse example of shaky cam and lightening editing ruin a film. It's all very well spending the money and having some decent set pieces but if you can't see what's going on because the director is rooted to the notion that the only way to show confusion and action is to shake the bloody camera around it just doesn't work. All the action scenes did was take you out of the film because you couldn't see what was happening. Mind you what was happening was pretty lame in places. Characters acting stupidly one minute, then spookily intelligent the next. Annoying kids like something out of a canadian film foundation piece sodding the whole thing up, ridiculous geographical hoops like running under the river to Greenwich only to then make it to Regents Park in a few hours followed by a walk to the new Wembley stadium. There were plot holes like the authorities finding a live carrier of the dormant virus but not posting any guards on her, fire that could gut an entire room but not go round a corner and a deranged killer zombie in the form of Robert Carlisle who was meant to be pathologically deranged with bloodlust yet had the tracking skills of a native red indian. A shocking film and a real waste of a concept. I pray that the makers of the I am Legend film with Will Smith don't look at this film and think 'Hey we should make it like this'.
Another early start on Sunday for a day of paintballing that my hairdresser had organised. I'd got out my combats, cleaned my boots, dusted off my knee protectors, found my woolen hat and scarf and laid out my mask. The mask had a plastic visor and I noticed that by removing it I could take the camo digger hat I'd bought the previous year and pull it down to cover the head. It looked pretty cool, breaking up the profile of the mask and if it did rain, which was forecast, would at least keep the water from the goggles. It also meant that I'd either be easier to identify and shoot or easier to identify to follow into battle. Dropped some Zimmer whilst I got ready to get me in the mood. Brother came up pumped for the fight and our mate picked us up. I'd driven on the Saturday, so he kindly offered on the Sunday.
Turned up at the venue and there were a lot more people than I'd ever seen at a paintballing place. To be fair I thought the sport was waning and that those that were ever going to go on it, had done so and thus it was becoming more a joke. Having seen a fair number of arsewits canvassing members of the public to come paintballing you began to feel that maybe it had had it's day. I was wrong and there must have been about 60 people in attendance. Some that looked like complete novices, others a little more experienced and two that had brought all of their own guns and kit etc. "All the gear and no idea" as the marshalls seemed to label them. When you check in they write a number on your hand for you to use when ordering more balls etc. Rather stupidly we didn't pay attention that the three of us were in a line and thus when two teams were created by doing Odd's and Even's my mate was on the other team.
It was too late to do anything as the different teams had different coloured hoppa's (the container that sits atop the gun and holds the paintballs). I was a little pissed off to be honest. I wasn't sulking but I had been looking forward to the three of us going into battle. The first game started and I hung back with my brother to defend the gun along with a few others. I noticed the two guys who had turned up with all the gear attempting to creep round on the left hand side. Brother and I holed up behind this barricade and started to trade shots with them. I caught one of them with a peach of a shot clear in the mask, which put him out of the game. The other continued to keep my brother pinned down. Someone on the other side came up to support the Reds (we were Blues). Balls started hammering into the boarding and called to another team member to put some fire down.
I heard my mate's voice calling in others. Amazing that even in the first game, with about 30 a side that we would bump right into each other. I moved to a wide tree and stood up to get a little height on the proceedings. I could see a few Reds waiting up. Brother was still trading fire with the other 'all the gear' and the Reds started to move round to support him. I fired off a quick burst and clocked at least two, including my mate. A kind of stalemate continued until the marshall blew the whistle for game over. He took a note of my number as well as my brothers.
The next game was attacking a fort that the Reds occupied. Brother and I were a little unsure of which angle to attack from but one of the marshalls suggested flanking round the back. We moved up on the fort and my brother pushed ahead. We were about two barricades away when he got shot and was out. There was another guy next to where my brother had been and I told him I was coming up. I then said I was going to push up to the next barricade. I waited while this guy reloaded, he counted me down and I charged forward as he lay down a hail of paint. It was quite a cool moment. I took my chance and unloaded almost a hoppa full of paint into the fort and through the gaps in the slats. I know I pinned at least two guys as I saw them rolling around trying to get away. That's not me being cruel but in paintball you've got to make sure they know they've been hit, otherwise they will carry on. I took a breather and came up to lay down some more fire but got tapped once in the gun and once in the mask, amazingly by my mate, god bless him. Again the marshall asked for my number.
The next game up was a speedball. I never usually like these as they just seem an excuse to burn through a shit load of a paint. The arena was twice as big as usual due to the extra number of people and is a more open area with a selection of barricades dotted around. Each team has to start on it's respective line, the whistle goes and you dive for cover. My brother and I positioned ourselves in a corner and tried to pick off what we could by shooting diagonally across the area. He moved forward and I reloaded my hoppa. Just as I'd finished I noticed someone had the temerity to be shooting at him and in a burst of protection pulled up my gun to cover him with the hoppa still open! Paintballs came out the back but at least I'd kept this guys head down. We harried him and I pinned him down whilst my brother played a blinder and moved to the left to get a better angle on him.
This served to make the guy hunker down even further behind his barricade and I used the chance to stand up and advance forward. I moved to the right and with the extra height of standing poured some fire right down on him. He stood up and bundled out of the area. I advanced forward and took out another guy, gaining in confidence and height as I seemed to go from a crouch to plain walking. With encouragement from the sidelines that no one was directly in front I advanced right to the far end of the area and then cut in to shoot the reds as they fired forwards, oblivious to my presence. The guns unfortunately aren't quite as accurate as you would like and I must have fired about 12 balls at this guy which peppered the wood around him until one caught him slap on the arse. My gun was now empty and taking cover behind a tree I called to the other blues further up the area to move down and take them. Without checking the colour of my hoppa they started shooting at me and clocked me. I shouted some obsencities and trudged off. A minute or so later and the whistle blew for game over. I felt pretty good as I'd pulled off a blinder of a flanking move with my brothers helpful diversionary advance, shot quite a few of the enemy and my deeds had been witnessed by some of my team members.
The day pretty much continued like this, though I'd say the first three were the best for actual gameplay. I did my mixture of kamikaze runs and shouting orders, sorry requests, for others to move up. Lunch was one solitary burger, which I felt was a bit mean, but it tasted all the finer for it and thankfully we'd bought a few provisions ourselves. It did rain in the afternoon though the canopy of the trees seemed to keep the worse away, though with my hat I was as happy as Larry. My mate on another occasion managed to put four rounds into my head and back from virtually point blank range when he was co-defending a fort and I slammed up against the wall right underneath him to fill the open door up with hot lead! (yeah baby I'm getting into this!) By the end of the day we were knackered and had each done about 1400 paintballs, which must be a record as I don't think I've done that many before, bar going down to my mates brother in Kent. It was amazing the amount of times we must have run into our friend on the field. I guess we have similar ideas about attacking etc and hence probably came across each other in all but two games.
After each game the chief marshall did a mention in dispatches style roll call where he went through certain players that had done funny things or his marshalls had thought noteworthy. At the end of the day he did a final roundup. Player 1 had done very well and went up to receive some kind of certificate. He then said that his marshalls had had their eyes on a couple of players and said that there wasn't much to decide between the two. He then called up player 48, my hairdresser, who had a really good run and shot a lot of people. We all cheered and thought that was in until the main guy said but the best player that all the marshalls have commented on is player 38. That was me!
I couldn't believe it. I'd had a couple of mentions in dispatches but I didn't think I been that good to be crowned Player of the Day. They even had a little trophy. I know they must bang them out but I was genuinely touched. I wasn't particularly sporty at school and thus have never won a trophy before. I was really, really pleased. From all the times that I've gone to paintball thinking 'Am I going to play shit, will I be scared when I should be brave' and here I was standing out from the crowd and having been noted by my actions on the field. I didn't want to come across as arrogant but I was chuffed to the max. The trophy naturally isn't solid silver but it does feel heavier than I might have imagined.
We must have got in around 5.00 ish and we were both shattered. I said to my brother that this would probably be the tiredness level that we would be feeling after a couple of days hitting the parks in Florida, though I'm hopeful I'll be a little fitter then! We just crashed out though I did manage to make some tuna pasta later which was very well received.
A good weekend finished off nicely with a glittering accolade! I'd like to thank my brother and my parents, my manager for...........................................!
Politics, polish and a deep explorer - 07/05/07
Very busy week for me. P was off looking after Biscuit meaning I had to raise my game to cover her workload. She does a lot, is very organised and makes my normal working day pretty easy. Without her in I was fielding a lot of stuff. No internet surfing during the day, my tea making average plummeted and I didn't even get time to fix my lunch.
It was good to be busy and feel productive but there were times when my lazier side kicked in and I wanted to be able surf the likes of ign and imdb. It was important that P was off to just chill out and I am paid well where I work so it's only right that I should have some busy days. During the evenings I managed to catch another trailer for Call of Juarez, a western shooter that looks very promising plus a trailer for Call of Duty 4. Activision pulled a blinder by getting Infinity Ward, the developers behind COD 2, to make a start on COD 4 in secret while they got Treyarch to do COD 3. It all sounds confusing but what it means is that COD 4 has had a year longer in development than one might have expected and as such came as a surprise.
Refreshingly the warfare is modern (the other three were all WWII) and judging by the trailer and the COD series immersive, cinematic style, it looks like it will be a belter. As brother and I were heading down to Tunbridge Wells to do our yearly electoral duties I thought I'd get the car cleaned. It would be good to say that we like to fulfil our civic responsibilities but in reality it's ok money for a relatively easy day. I decided to take the car washers up on their offer of wash, clean and polish for £15. What a difference it made. The car looked awesome. Clean and sparkly and I couldn't stop looking at it. It's engine and ride might not be as good as the Focus ST but it's a good looking car. Times like this and you wish you were taking a girl out on a date. Naturally I wouldn't be so cheesy as to expect her to go 'Phwoar, that's a nice car mister' but a subtle appreciative nod once she got in would feel good.
Managed to get my desk in shape by Wednesday night as I was taking off Friday, in addition to the Thursday and hit the shops to get provisions for the following day. Sausage rolls, cocktail sausages, quiche (dangerous with my brother I know but alcohol wasn't present), homemade sandwiches, strips of chicken, yoghurts, crisps, tortillas with accompanying sour cream dip, biscuits, chocolates, soft drinks and tea bags. Easy work and plenty of food - my kind of combo!
Thursday was an early start. Up for 5.15, picked brother up at 6.05 and blasted all the way down to Tunbridge Wells, making it in just over 20 minutes, which was pretty impressive. Got the tables, booths, signs etc all put up in time for the official start at 7.00am. There were even two people waiting from 6.55 to have their vote. The weather was pretty miserable and this along with probably the lack of publicity meant for a low turnout. The ward we were looking after had about 1300 eligible voters, yet only about 250 turned up. You certainly see some sights and people from different walks of life doing that job. Old women who despite the obvious discomfort of walking still proudly come to have their vote, fat people who waddle in with food splashed clothing and smelling of lard, hurried businessman and bored mums.
Amazing as well the amount of people who don't make an instant calculation as they approach the ballot box that their voting slip will not fit in the slot. The human brain is amazing. Put it behind the wheel of a car and it can judge a car coming towards it, the speed it's moving at, the distance in which it will reach you and calculate with ease whether you need to speed up or slow down to allow you both to pass by each other. Put it behind a ballot paper and box and it's brain turns to shit. Furthermore try and gently nudge the person with a 'you might have to fold that sir' and they will do everything in their power to ram it through the slot to prove you wrong.
In addition to the mountain of food, I'd also taken along a magazine, some books and the Orlando folder. My plan was to use the free time I had to work out the itinerary but of course I never seemed to manage to get round to it. You always find that when you have made provision of food and entertainment for an entire day that you almost don't want to start it too early.
A. because you don't know where to start and
B. you don't want to exhaust your resources too soon.
We also occupied ourselves with 10 things within the human body that have 3 letters. Trust me it isn't as easy as you would first think.
Shut down the operation at the school hall at 10pm when the vote was finished and headed over to the town hall to count the votes. One can normally expect to be there for a good few hours and even more on a general election but with such a low turnout we were all done in just over an hour and a half. The chief executive of the council would read out the line "and I, Sheila Wheeler, as the presiding officer declare....' I made a plank of myself by turning to one of the counters next to me and saying "so who is this Ishe Wheeler then?" Obviously she must have been related to Ide Claire as well. We were away by just after 11.30, which was a real result.
I was knackered and looking forward to bed but I had another early morning as I needed to be at the doctors for 9am. There were a few things I wanted to check with him and as I had the day off, it seemed a good idea two weeks previously to book an early one. Come that morning and it didn't seem such a good idea. We chatted about a few things and one of them needed me to have my first rectal examination. It's probably a little embarrasing to discuss but there is comedy mileage in it and my site is all about sharing isn't it! We agreed I would come back at 12.45 for it so I popped round the shop for a paper and some bread before heading back home to relax for the next few hours.
I've never had anyone go looking up my arse and I confess to being a little wary of it. I'm sure by 35 most adults have had it done but it was a first for me. How far would he go up? Would he use lubrication? Would I be able to walk afterwards! He said he'd be using his finger and then this metal instrument! He said I didn't need to do any preparation beforehand and would you believe that on getting home that I felt the need for a dump. After doing so I must have spent the next half an hour scrubbing the area to prevent any embarrasment. The time came and I returned to the doctors.
"Take your trousers down and hop onto the bed" he said.
"Do you want me to take them off" I replied.
"No, don't get anything out" he almost shouted. He felt round my tummy and then asked me to roll onto my side and pull my knees up as close to chin but still being comfortable. He started some conversation like
"Had I taken a day off, what did I do for a living' as he slid his finger in. Blimey. I tried to maintain a steady level of conversation as he continued
"Right that's your prostrate gland" which didn't seem that far up to be honest though I couldn't really see if he was up to the second joint or the knuckle. That was kinda bearable I thought and then the metal, dildo like instrument went up. I struggled to maintain normal breathing and flustered the delivery of my explanation of what my job entailed. Christ this was a weird feeling. It didn't hurt but the desire, or falsely created desire, to 'pinch one off' was very strong. I did a little breathing exercise to control the 'contractions' but couldn't fight it anymore when he pulled it out. As the two events happened simultaneously I wasn't sure whether I had accidentally shat myself. I assumed not otherwise his reaction would have been more noticeable but he did then say clean yourself up with the paper on the bed and place it in the bin.
Mortified I dabbed the area to check that I hadn't and thankfully I was clean. I know he would have seen it all before but it's kinda funny having a conversation with someone when they've had their finger up your arse and their face practically buried in your crack. Surprisingly he didn't ask about my diet, which I'm sure would have resulted in a few tuts, and gave me the all clear. I offered him a handshake to thank him for his time, which he reluctantly accepted with his other hand. Walking back, my mind turned to what I'd experienced and gay sex. It wasn't a painful experience but not one that I was comfortable with. I know that stimulation of the prostrate gland is meant to trigger a mind bending orgasm in a bloke but sex and a huge desire to take a shit at the same time is not a combination that I think works for me or would want to try.
Had booked my car in for some kind of clutch washer that needed to be fitted for a factory recall that I'd been written to about. Naturally I wouldn't have to pay for it but as the car was there I thought I'd get them to look at the tracking as the guy had recommended alI those months ago when I changed the tyres. They said it would take around an hour-ish so my brother and I headed up to a local park to throw the american football around a bit. There's something about chucking this thing backwards and forwards that is immeasurably cool. Throw a good one and it's pure poetry in motion, particularly when coupled with a sweet catch. It's good to keep our arm in for when we are pulling off Marino-esque throws and heroic catches on a US beach infront of awe-inspired young college girls.
Decided that afternoon as we were both off and so was P to head over and see how she was getting on with Biscuit. It's good for her to spend some quality time with her but it would also be good to give her a little break. We stopped off at Sainsburys to get some bits so we could cook something up for tea. Decided on poulet de marge (egg 'n' crumb chicken) with potato wedges (two different variants), baked beans, mushrooms and a sour cream dip for the wedges. It took time to bring it all together but what a feast. The chicken was great and cooked to perfection by myself. The different wedges were lovely, especially with the dip and we cooked the mushrooms in butter with some chopped onions and they were fantastic. Yum.
Biscuit was very well behaved throughout and snuggled down in her cage. No fussing or barking for attention and I loved how earlier when P and brother went down the garden to check out how the dog toilet was performing that she just sat and watched them patiently from behind her fence. I decided we were going to watch some of my favourite Quantum Leaps that night. First up was MIA, which was the season closer of Season 2. It's the one where Al is trying to get Sam to tell Beth his first wife that he is still alive as a POW and not to lose faith that he will return. It's a very touching episode. We followed this with the leap home where Sam goes home and tries to affect his family when he is just a kid, again it's another great episode. Finally (they are only 40 mins long) was the 2nd part of this where Sam leaps into Vietnam alongside his brother. It's very well played but the most wonderful part of the episode and of all five series is the moment when you realise that through the course of the mission that Sam is on, Al could have been rescued from captivity but didn't tell Sam so he could instead save his brother from being killed. Unfortunately they don't linger on the moment for long but it really is wonderful. The realisation that Al consigned his younger self to another five years in miserable captivity and in turn lost the love of his life so Sam could save his brother is one of the most honest, heart-warming acts of genuine friendship that I've ever seen.
Saturday was a glorious lay in and I followed it by dragging my sorry arse to the gym. I had a decent ASOT on the ipod and concentrated on CV. I nailed our 400 cals on the running machine, followed by another 200 on the bike and 200 on the cyclic trainer. It was good to be back there but I know that I'm not truly back into the swing of things yet. Headed out that night into town and had some good fun. We went to the bar we'd been in when my mate and brother got drunk in and met two of the girls. Headed upstairs for a monthly boogiewonderland night. It was a good laugh. The music was cheesy and right up our street and there was plenty of dancing and stupidity. The girls can be quite energetic, just like me, and I did see one particular woman giving them filthy looks but sod 'em. We were enjoying ourselves and weren't hurting anyone. Needless to say we followed this with a McDonalds blow out which is always a good way to end a Saturday night. Must do the tea house again soon, though I think this is always a more intimate affair and better with a maximum of three.
Got up early again on the Sunday as the MotoGP was on in China and the BBC weren't going to repeat the race later in the day hence by 7.30 am I was wide awake in front of the telly with some tea and toast. Another great race and Casey Stoner managed to beat Rossi, which is always good to see. Giving Rossi credit he managed to keep up with Stoner's powerful Ducati but made a late braking error which gave Stoner the chance to scamper off in the final few laps. Of course everyone trots out the line that Casey only won because of the superior power of the duke. Granted it's got some mumbo in a straight line but you still have to control the power and Casey did this brilliantly. He seems a nice guy, who for me was the rider to watch last year, and rightly deserves being top of the championship table.
As I was up I ran my brother to Bluey before mooching around and looking in the shops. I still felt good in my arctic combats and seemed to notice more people in camo combats, though I only saw one other in the same as mine. Managed to hang around long enough to grab a spot of lunch with my brother before returning home to do a little more Orlando research. After my intention to do the daily planner on the election day I'm trying to get back into the swing of things so we can order the attraction tickets. Headed back to bluey that evening to watch the film shooter. It was a pretty formulaic film with some inconsistencies and huge holes but the action scenes were entertaining, some of the sniping shots were impressive and his evasion tactics were quite cool. It's always funny in these films how the audience is meant to be outraged at the false accusation of a proud innocent man and concerned about the man who has been assassinated but not about the countless men who he kills, who just like him must be simply doing their jobs.
Monday was a Bank Holiday and as such another lazy one. Achieved very little which was a personal truimph before heading out later that night to check out Spiderman 3. I hadn't been impressed with the 1st or 2nd ones and was expecting very little from this but I was curious at how bad it could be and we had nothing else to do.
Christ it was crap. A clunky leaden script. The dodgy fx of him swinging through the streets has still not been improved and stills looking poor cgi to me. Every action scene always seems to fill the same formula: Fall from a great height, hit something on the way down, then go through something like a hole or narrowing gap and always be reaching for something that gets knocked away at the last moment. Why does his mask always have to get ripped across the face, the audience aren't stupid, we do still know its Tobey Maguire and don't need constant reminders. They pull the same trick with venom in that everyone time he talks the suit has to pull back to reveal Brock. Bearing in mind the amount of times it rips why doesn't spidey make the mask out of the same material that covers his crotch because that never ever seems to tear or rip.
Why does there always have to be a connection between a bad guy and spidey. Can't he just fight normal criminals. When he's listening to the scanner and hears about a triple homicide does he think if only it was my cousin's dentists sister who once knew my Aunt May and was tying her shoelace when Mary Jane stubbed her toe. There is no decent soundtrack to speak of and a clumsy use of piano to signal to the audience every time a supposedly tender sequence is upon us. Talking of tender, jesus the amount of crying in the film. It's like every main character had written in that they had to have at least two of the solitary tear rolling down the cheek scenes. The eye drop makers must have had a field day. The script writers, one of whom is the director Sam Raimi, simply can't write scripts and have the delusions of granduer that they can make their characters dark and complex. For them it's not enough that a character could start bad and then turn good. Oh no, Harry Osbourne has to go from bad to good, then back to bad and finally back to good.
In reality you don't give two shits about the characters. Peter acts like a nerdy twat who when turns bad becomes this greasy haired, cheesy arse. The only time he displays the darker guy that we want is when he berates the police officer for telling him that for film plot convenience the man who ACTUALLY killed his uncle is still alive. Mary Jane is just plain annoying and I wish had been killed off. How can people not tire of her constant screaming and playing the damsel in distress. Harry is unimportant, the sandman ridiculous and Venom plain wasted. And finally Stan Lee's cameo! How when you are the creator does your ego and desire to be in the film become so strong that you are prepared to create this wooden, intrusive scene just to get a cameo for the boys. What next Sam, are you going to get your cook, cleaner and dog walker in the film as well. Slate Cameron all you want but I don't see him thinking 'you know it would be great if I had a speaking part in Titanic so I could say I was in it.
What a crock of shit. How this pants could have cost $250 million is beyond me. The FX aren't that great, no money was spent on the film score and the script is so lame I could have written better sitting on the toilet on a piece of charmin double velvet. Don't waste your money.
Take care folks and sorry once again for the delay in it's posting.
The arrival of Biscuit and my arctic combats - 30/04/07
First off apologies to those hardly souls that try to be regulars to my site. Just as I get a small spike in the number of visitors I receive, I respond by being late by two weeks. Still, at least the ridiculous length of some of my other rambles means they should find something to keep the boredom at bay.
Managed to make my weekly exercise of swimming on Monday. I didn't use the special gloves that someone at work had bought me but when it becomes a more regular event I can see them being used. The gloves simply make your hand more webbed helping technique and propulsion through the water. Came home to watch the Australian western, The Proposition, on TV. I'd given it a fair chunk of thought about hiring it from the video shop but the inclusion of Ray Winstone put me off. It had Guy Pearce in it, who I really like, but it was pretty mediocre. Lots of long looks into the Australian outback and sunsets rather than any decent story or action. It was ok but far from memorable and I'm glad I waited it for it to be on the telly.
My Arctic camo combats arrived on Tuesday and I goddam love them. They look wicked and I so wished I'd got them a few years back when I meant to. I see more people wearing camo'd combats, though rarely the arctic ones, and I wish I'd been just a little further ahead of them. I like their practicality with the number of pockets etc but also their standout colour and patterning. So many trousers available to men are just one colour. There's nothing wrong with black or blue jeans or black or grey trousers but it seems there isn't the opportunity to be as bold in the trouser dept when it comes to guys as there is for girls. I realise camo is hardly bold but it is a touch different and I think they are great. I wore them to work the next day like a kid at school who is wearing long trousers for the first time. What's more because they are made up of white, black and grey you can also wear anyone of those colours on top to match.
The same company do the old US desert style combats, which are nicknamed 'cookie dough' as they are a light brown with these flecks of black and white in them. The pattern is even rarer and at only £25 they'll be great for work. I'm not a violent man but working in South East London it wouldn't hurt to look slightly intimidatory if I ever needed to get out of the car on the way home.
It was one of the guys birthdays in the office and his special lunch of choice was McDonalds which I gratefully received and we followed it with another cheescake from The English Cheesecake Company www.cheesecake.co.uk This time is was a cheesecake topped with strawberry pieces and chunks of shortbread and it was pretty darn tasty. Not for me as good as the profiterole one we had a few weeks back but still some way better than any other cheesecake I've tasted.
Went home that evening to see a programme called Edwardian Supersize Me. Christ, did the wealthy in those times eat a lot of meat. Taking a shit then must have a nightmare with the amount of protein they stuffed down their throats every morning, noon and night. It was done with a sense of humour and not the heavy handed, preachiness of Spurlocks Supersize Me and was very entertaining. They had some meals at authentic restaurants, including one in central London that I wouldn't mind trying out, and others at the home of a woman who specialised in Edwardian cooking. It did shame me a little for the amount that I'd tucked away that day but also had the effect of making me more hungry! Some of the breakfasts included curried hard boiled eggs, kippers and chops followed by meaty pies for lunch with minimal vegetables, afternoon tea and then a 4 - 7 course evening meal.
Remember the internet drumming that I received over a year ago from the delightful folks at italk2much (check in self flagellation for their thoughts). Well I decided to check out their site again recently and made a few comments. Off the back of this I had one of the reviewers contact me to say that she had kinda liked my site at the time but not said anything. She even recognised what a pasting I'd taken and how I'd handled it. It was quite heartwarming to know that at least not everyone then had hated the site and someone had looked a little deeper. We've exchanged some more emails since and she seems quite fun with a tendency to ramble even more than me!
I had some extra early mornings on the Thursday and Fridays as I was running my brother over to P's to make her garden puppie proof as well as digging the hole for the dog loo. Got to borrow the Focus ST to drive home on the Thursday and gave my brother his first taste of the Focus magic. I think he was impressed though if he could drive he would have appreciated how much more fun it is to drive than my Fiesta. He did some sterling work over the two days and as well as P being very pleased with him I was immensely proud of him. He showed a lot of resourcefulness in resolving problems and just getting on with solid hard graft.
We decided to have a BBQ in P's garden on the Friday though seemed to be racing against failing light and slightly colder conditions than we'd expected. The disposable BBQ's that we'd got seemed useless and generated about as much heat as the torch I was using to see what I was cooking. God if there is one thing that frustrates me it's trying to cook food on something that I can't control. No amount of blowing or shaking was speeding one of these things up. When the rage eventually subsided I did manage to concede that at least the burgers and sausages had cooked even if the kebabs were taking an age and doing nothing but coming off the bloody spike. We'd bought this amazing Cross & Blackwell Tomato and Pepper relish from Tesco's that tasted fab with the burgers and I confess the sausages weren't bad either. Even the kebabs, which were a mixture of lamb and chicken weren't bad once they had eventually cooked.
It was quite nice sitting in the garden with a plateful of food. Granted it could have done with being about 5-10 degrees warmer and maybe an hour previous but it was a nice way to end the week and probably particularly satisfying for my brother considering the hours he'd spent toiling away in the garden. It was also good for P to take her mind off the growing excitement of getting her puppy the very next day. Bearing in mind we had a long day we didn't stay too late.
Saturday started off pretty much as the previous trip to Somerset had been although this time my brother had come along for the ride. We'd packed the requisite Caburys eclairs, drinks and humbugs and hit the road. P was a little nervous that it was close to happening at last. She's been amazing in her determination and thoroughness in getting the dog. Sourcing the breed, doing the research, changing her car, buying all the stuff etc. But now we were drawing to the ultimate goal and the realisation that it was going to happen filled her with some trepidation. I could feel part of it as well. I wanted everything to be right for her and hoped that when we got there we weren't going to find that they'd all been allocated off as the breeders had ensured us that they weren't going to be. The journey down was fine with a stop and driver change at one of the service stations. We had to buy a camera here as P's digital camera had received this unexpected crack to the back viewfinder, rendering it completely useless. We sat down for a hot choc here and I still find people watching at these places fascinating. So many people coming and going and you become intrigued by what their individual stories might be.
We drove through Castle Cary again to get our bearings and then blasted over to the Cheddar Gorge. My brother hadn't seen it before and as we were in the area I wanted him to check it out. As we had some spare time we pulled up in one of the quieter parking bays and decided to get some fresh air. One of the peppars from the previous nights BBQ was still making it's presence known and I was keen to get it shifted further down and generate an appetite for the trip to the same pub we'd visited two weeks previously. We started clambering up the incline to the grass line and then pushed on further up. The gradient of incline in most cases was at least 45º and there was a little scrambling up to the tree line. Give P credit, she was a game old duck for heading up there with us in her flat trainers whereas I was in mountain goat mode with combats, boots and high visibility vest (schott gilet turned inside out) on.
We didn't get to the top or anything but it was some way up and the exertion added some refreshment along with the view which was quite impressive. We even had a good view of some proper climbers on the other side of the gorge, which is a little more rockfacey. We gingerly navigated our way down, which took a little longer bearing in mind the steepness. We even spotted this vibrant green salamander or newt on the way down which took us all a bit by surprise. With the appetite at last beginning to kick back in we zoomed back to Castle Cary and to the White Hart. We couldn't pick up the puppy until 2.00pm so I'd decided it would give us another chance to sample, and share with my brother, the wonders of their pub grub.
I had phoned on the Thursday to ascertain what their specials were going to be and thankfully it was going to be Steak 'n' Ale pie. I sang their praises down the phone and they even offered to reserve a table for us. We walked into the pub and there was our little table by the window with a reserved sign on it. Sitting opposite were the same older couple that had been in there two weeks ago as well. We ordered the pie and chips for three and the food was just as good. My brother was impressed and all three of us cleared our plates. Unlike the last time we could now sample their dessert menu and it was just as good. P went for strawberries and ice cream whilst my brother and I went for the spotted dick and custard. Simple, homely food but god so well done.
It's a shame that we'll never have the need to go there again but at least along with the Cheddar Gorge that area will hold more than just the place P got Biscuit from. Just like Nellie Crumbs in Wareham, at least I'll be able to come out with an obscure recommendation for anyone going to the county of Somerset.
Headed over to the breeders after this and my brother got his first Wheaten greetin'. Melody, the mum, was there and we managed to get some pics but unfortunately the dad, D'arcy, was out on stud duties. The pups had grown a fair bit in the two weeks and still looked lovely. Unfortunately there were only two bitches to choose from. I was a little disappointed with the breeder to be honest. He seemed a nice guy and had mentioned how another woman who wanted a show dog had been given first dibs on the bitches. Naturally this was fine but I couldn't understand why someone else had been allowed to reserve one as well. Especially when P had been the first one to respond by phone and also come down to see them. I quelled my moral outrage as it was P's call and not mine. Besides, creating a tense unpleasant atmosphere wouldn't help anyone.
The breeder pulled the two bitch puppies out of the pen and onto the floor. One of them immediately went over to P to investigate her while the other decided to have a look at the carrying crate that she'd brought with her. I think that sealed it along with how it's coat seemed a little lighter. With the decision made the breeder went through grooming tips and all the relevant paperwork. Then it was time to go. With Biscuit safely in her crate we returned to the car and started the journey home. P sat in the back with biscuit moving between her lap and the crate and although initially perturbed by the movement of the car, I wasn't throwing it around but the roads were twisty, was content to fall asleep with her feet in the air when we hit the steady routine of the motorway. Grabbed a burger and a shake about half way home which helped and must have got back to P's at around 6.30ish. Needless to say the Focus performed magnificently again and made the whole drive such a pleasure. It's a real shame when I have to park it up and drive home in mine.
Biscuit had a sniff around downstairs to get her bearings and it gave us a chance to have a look at her in more detail. She really is totally adorable. She's got the cuteness of a golden lab pup, the big paws of a German Shepherd pup, ridiculously soft and fluffy fur and the most delightful, beautiful face. I know I sound gushy but it's true. She's golden all over bar these small patches on the end of her paws and on her face and nose that add real character. She's inquisitive and bold but also seems really balanced. She's content to sit still and look at you as well as having mad moments where she will race around. I take my hat off to P's choice for I have never seen a prettier, more lovely looking dog. And the great thing about the breed is that she will only get better and better. What a dog.
We left P's at 7.30ish and although a little tired thought we'd take a drive through our town to see if people were out and about before deciding whether we would hit the town. Unfortunately the roads had other ideas and an impromtpu closing of the Blackwall tunnel meant that we had to navigate our way through the streets of inner London. At one point I stopped at a set of traffic lights and looked across the road into another car with two girls in it. The passenger clocked me and must have mentioned something to her driver friend who then looked over. I poked my tongue out and she screwed up her face in a mock growl. I suddenly found myself beaming back to which she reciprocated and I thought how refreshingly fun and friendly is that. Maybe people aren't so bad I began to muse before having the cynicism firmly re-applied when not a minute later a youth ran into the road to retrieve a football causing me to stamp on the brakes. My chance to bask in the warmth of some spontaneous, impulsive flirtation was rudely replaced by bellowing out an insult that questioned his intelligence and mentioned a sexual act.
By the time we'd battled our way through the traffic and lost our rag a few times more we'd wasted over two hours meaning that going out was firmly knocked on the head. In reality I don't think we were that gutted as we were quite knackered.
Sunday was the usual mooch around. There was some British superbikes on the telly in the afternoon which was mildy entertaining. Brother and I decided to gorge on some pizza that evening along with another viewing of Hitch with Will Smith. It's a good film and Will is great but it's the Albert and Allegra story that always enchants me. It easier to imagine Will with his looks and charm getting anyone but Albert is more of an average joe and thus I identify with him a lot more. The guy also knows how to dance.
Talk soon.
Fine dining and further appreciation of Burt's moustache - 23/04/07
A pretty quiet week all in all with not a huge amount happening and hence not a great deal to report. This could well lead to a shorter entry, which may delight many, but who knows I could start aimlessly rambling. Expected the roads in the morning to be a lot busier than they were yet at times they were very busy and others unnervingly quiet. Maybe the holiday season has effectively started now.
Swimming on Monday was my only effort at getting back into the swing of things but considering the complete lack of anything beforehand at least it was a start - "small moves Ellie, small moves". Got through another John O'Callaghan CD, this time a live mixed one and it was a lot better. There were some considerably better tunes and with the second CD being compiled by K90 who had some very choice cuts at a slightly faster tempo it was a much welcomed substitute for that other one I got last week. I also got round to ordering some US military style black/white urban camo combats. I've loved that arctic style camo for years and have been meaning to get some for ages. I don't know if it was the money, having the time to source them or really having nowhere to wear them but I seem to have fumbled around getting some for an eternity. Well at last I tracked some down at a reasonable price and got them ordered. I can't wait as I'll be able to wear them to work.
Took some of our clients for a spot of lunch at The Dorchester on Thursday and it was a nice day. The hotel is pretty special though a touch too oldy - worldy for my personal taste. You could still feel the money within the place though and we started with a few drinks in the bar. It was pretty cool and it's some time since I've been in a place where they had bottles of drink on the bar menu for £1,200. Made me wonder what it must be like to have the money to go into the bar one afternoon and decide that you were going to remain there until you were completely pissed. The toilets were pretty special. Plenty of limestone and sparkling porcelain. They had their own version of a GTA but he turned the tap on, squidged the soap into my hand and then handed me a towel. I felt a bit bad as I didn't have any change but to be honest do feel it a liberty to expect to cough up a quid just for the above. Imagine if you needed a dump knowing that there was a guy standing not 10 feet from the cubicle in absolute silence. Suffice to say that there would need to be a lot of clearing of one's throat at key audible moments.
We moved into The Grill and were shown to our table. The menu looked a little daunting and I went for scallops and risotto. I've never had scallops before but my mate said it was the safest bet. I'm not a fish connoisseur, apart from maybe battered cod, but it tasted ok and the risotto part was nice. For main one of their specialities was roast beef with yorkshire pud and at £30 for it, I hoped it would be good. The maître d brought up two joints on a silver platter. One medium rare for the others that were having beef and one that was well done for me. I know there were mutters that I was being a philistine but this is how I like my meat. Cooked properly with all the juices sealed in and more likely to soak up the gravy. Looking at their medium rare pieces which looked a little fatty I got a far better cut, including the very top piece which was delicious. We may have been in a fancy restaurant but when the maìtre d offered to puncture my yorkshire to allow the gravy to go inside I knew he understood that I liked my food. The carrots were a little sweet but the roast potatoes were faultless. Nothing really jumped out at me on the dessert menu so I went boring again and had the ice cream. Naturally this was made on the promises and delighted me by being exceptional. Some of the finest chocolate ice cream that I've ever tasted.
Overall it was a lovely meal. The service was excellent and the surroundings very pleasant. A few more people in the restaurant would have added to the atmosphere but it was a Thursday lunchtime. Still, the actor Alan Alda was dining in the restaurant with his family along with the former Formula 1 boss, Eddie Jordan. There was an Arab guy in the table next to us casually eating on his own and happily reading his paper. Again it made me wonder what kind of world you must live in where spending nearly £100 on lunch on your own seems perfectly normal. It's a life I wouldn't mind sampling. It was a lovely warm spring afternoon that day and heading back through central London I chided myself for not spending more time in my capital city when I was so close to it. Seeing people milling round areas of such history and importance or relaxing in the parks made me long for a couple of barmy afternoons in the city. Needless to say that there were a fair few sunshine sheila's catching my eye, which only added to the fantastical mind meanderings I was having.
Saturday was the return of the fabled lie in. I've proved that I can get up early and do something with the day when there is something meaningful to do but I needed to put some hours back into the bank and this did the job nicely. Popped some washing on and then found myself slumped in front of the TV contemplating the gym. Smokey and the Bandit came on and just as you found a million things to do when you should have been revising when younger, I realised I'd never seen this film completely. Thus I decided I would. Blimey the Trans Am he has in it has a 6.6 litre engine. He'd need a supertanker behind him if he wanted to live up to the cars name and actually take it 'trans america'. It had a wicked growl and sound though so it's contribution to the melting ice caps can be forgiven.
Watching the film reminds me that you've got to hand it to Burt Reynolds. He's a mans man. He wears that moustache very well with no hint of homosexuality. You can see why the ladies love him and you imagine that he would be fantastic fun to 'hang with', especially in his heyday when he must have been a wild thing. I really like the way he stuck with his look and he gives the impression that he has a lot of fun in his films. He might not be the greatest actor of all time but looking at him in the likes of The Cannonball Run, Hooper and the Smokey and the Bandit films he certainly enjoyed himself. Burt Reynolds I salute you.
Later that evening watched another cool guy, Bear Grylls, in the final episode of his Born Survivor series. Another fascinating episode with him in the Copper Canyon province of Mexico this time. Highlights were him eating a live scorpion (once he'd cut the stinger off), beetle larvae, mud for the minerals that it contained and best of all a fish that he scooped out of the river, lopped off it's head, scooped out it's innards and then took a bite. "I love sushi" he said smiling at the camera "but I don't love bones". What another great guy. His matter of factness, incredible fitness and agility and cheerful demeanour make for great TV. I look forward to seeing what his next adventure chooses to be.
Following the previous weekends excesses I was glad to be home saving some cash for the coming weekends and holiday. Periods of inactivity are never good for checking the wild ramblings of my mind and my brother and I had a damn good bitch about some of the things that really cheese us off. Why nobody is courteous or true to their word, why there seem to be so many women but no way of meeting them, why everything seems to be about fucking over everyone else to get ahead. What a miserable old bastard I'm turning into!
The Turkish MotoGP was fantastic on Sunday. It looked like Rossi was going to waltz off into the distance with it at the beginning but he made an error which let through Casey Stoner on the Ducati who then himself waltzed off into the distance. Rossi attempted a fight back but came under pressure from Tony Elias, the Spanish rider who snatched victory from Rossi in Portugal last year and who seems to have the balls to enter a genuine race track battle with him. It's great to see a younger rider not so daunted by Rossi's persona that he dare not scrap with him. He was sliding the bike into corners like nobody's business and laid a hard but fair pass on Rossi that he couldn't recover from. Indeed as Elias went on to cement his second place Rossi went back through the field with what seemed to be a tyre problem.
It played out great for the championship meaning that Stoner is leading, Rossi has some work to do and maybe others might be encouraged from Elias' battling that the great man is fallible. I'm not saying I want Rossi to always loose. I just want to see riders stand up to him and us to get some cracking battles. Anyway it bodes well for the coming season.
That's about it for another week so adios amigos.
Cute puppies, excellent peas and a quiche fuelled chunder bomb - 16/04/07
The John O'Callaghan album turned up and I gotta say that it was disappointing. I was looking forward to hearing the same level of wicked trance that I'd heard in Heaven but it just wasn't up to that standard. There were literally one or two ok-good tunes but overall it's a very forgettable album. I know people will say you should give it time but with trance and dance music I can tell reasonably quickly whether it's going to float my boat or not. When I had some decks and used to buy vinyl I had to learn to be able to size up quickly whether a tune was going anywhere and needed to be bought. I'll have a look round and see if there is anything else to pickup.
Remaining on a musical note I kept hearing the Nelly Furtado song 'say it right' which I really like. It was looping on her site and after re-listening to it quite a few times thought I really should do her the service of buying it on i-Tunes. I don't really like her other stuff and I think this is why this song seemed to stand so much more. Cracking tune.
During the week Bungie released a video documentary of Halo 3. It wasn't giving away any details about the single player campaign and rather was just focusing on some of the aspects of multiplayer that they've been working on. The graphics weren't the finished example either but by christ did it look good. Some of the stuff they've got planned like the ability to save kills/moments of interest and the bubble shield that we first saw in the second trailer they released look really cool. Best of all though is to see the return of the assault rifle. This was by far my favourite weapon from the first Halo and it's non appearance in the second was a huge disappointment. It's going to have a slimmer clip (only 32 rounds from what we can deduce) but seeing it being fired in anger again in a new environment was a very welcome sight. The excitement about Halo 3 is being maintained at a nice bubbling level.
We celebrated my mate's birthday in the office on Friday. As he's hitting the age of 35 and for many a year has talked jokingly about going insane, taking his trousers off and charging around with a samurai sword we decided to buy him one. We managed to find a load on the net and had thought we wouldn't actually be able to get a real one, especially with all the weapon laws etc. The benefits of the internet were highlighted when we found a review of the very sword we were thinking of getting by a rather obsessive, wonky eyed guy from the US. His thoroughness in commenting on each small detail and selection of zoomed in photos certainly helped clarify in our minds that the sword we were getting, a 40' Paul Chan practical Katana, was the right one to get. Thank god for OCD and the internet.
I think he was pretty made up with it. It has a re-assuring weight and balance to it and it seemed to hold a lot of fascination with the guys in the office. There was just something about sliding it free from it's scabbard and feeling it's dangerous, exposed weight in the palm of your hand (blimey I'm sounding like the wonky eyed guy now!). P had also ordered cheesecake from The English Cheescake Company. It had been delivered the previous day frozen solid as a block, which is how they are meant to arrive. You then stick them in the fridge or wherever and let them defrost for at least 8 hours. When it arrived we'd taken a gander at it and it looked ok but not that inspiring. We'd ordered a profiterole cheesecake and when I accidentally knocked one of the profiteroles, it seemed empty. During it's defrost time it changed into something truly wonderful and the birthday boy pronounced it one of the best he'd ever tasted in the office. It was amazing. Soft, light and so tasty. I ended up having three pieces as I couldn't bear to see it chucked. I think I'll be requesting one for my birthday.
I wanted to have a reasonably early night as had an early start on the Saturday morning but I'd dragged my feet during the week with my journal entry and then compounded it by driving all the way home, pulling up outside my gaff and realising that I'd left something important at the office meaning I had to drive all the way back to pick it up. What an arse!
Up early and over to P's as I'd promised I'd keep her company down to Somerset, where she was going to meet the breeder of a litter of puppies that had become available. I didn't consider it a chore. It would be nice to do something different, go somewhere new and be involved with the excitement that P was going through. Besides we could give the ST a good run. We hit the road at 7.30 loaded with drinks, humbugs and cadburys eclairs and using the car's MP3 port played some Armin from my nano. It felt good to up early and doing something and I was looking forward to it. We passed Stonehenge on the way down which is always a good sight, even if only because you are reminded just how close it is to the main road. Made it down to the small town of Castle Cary in good time (under three hours) and as we were early thought we'd park up and have a look around.
What a lovely little English town it was. Small quaint shops, a service petrol station, amiable relaxed people milling around and a couple of nice pubs. Unfortunately even here it couldn't escape the curse of multi food establishments. We had a fish'n'chip/chinese right next to a pizza/kebab. It was a warm morning and it felt a million miles from where we'd come from. The public toilets were clean and even the car park was free. That sound strange but coming from London you almost felt like you wanted to check with a local resident. "sorry the sign says I can park my car for nothing, that can't be right can it?"
Got to around 11.00ish and with P's excitement and trepidation peaking, headed round to the breeders house. Met the husband outside who had thought we were coming later but was still warm and friendly and invited us in. We moved into the kitchen and I got my first taste of a Wheaten greeting. We were met by the mum of the litter, Melody, who was three years old and Nel, a pup, who was only seven months old. They were both lovely but Nel, who'd been recently groomed was adorable. Her coat was so soft and fluffy and she was this bundle of uncontainable energy that seemed so over-whelmed and excited to see you. She would be turning and moving to get even more loving and as you moved your hand over her head and back to stroke her she'd almost follow your hand round to keep in contact with you. It must have gone on for about ten minutes and was so energetic that I couldn't stop laughing. Eventually she calmed down as Melody had already done so and we started chatting to the owner.
He was a lovely guy who certainly knew his stuff about the breed but didn't subscribe to some of the more fanatical and obsessive members of the Wheaten Association. He offered advice on how to feed, groom and look after them. He talked through his history of owning the dogs and some of the show awards that he'd won. He wasn't showing off but rather could see we were interested and was keen to answer our questions. The little six week old puppies were in a pen in the kitchen and were just as one would expect. Very cute. I love the way how when you put your hand in they seem to clamber over each other just to say hello or lick your hand, yet five minutes after this frenzy, they seem to just crash and are happy to sleep in almost any position. Whether that be resting their head on anothers body or with a paw across their face.
We'd seen Melody, the mum, who had a lovely temperament but understandably wasn't looking as well presented. She had nailed out eight puppies only six weeks ago so we were understanding. The owner then talked to us about the father, a 15 month old called Darcy. He'd won best Wheaten puppy at Crufts about two months ago and I was intrigued to see if there would be a noticeable difference. He brought him out and there definately was. From the youtube videos that I've seen with P, this was a great example of a Wheaten. His coats was soft, shiny and golden with a slight wave to it. He was stocky but on the right side of huggable and was friendly, inquisitive and energetic. What a lovely dog. I can personally vouch for the fact that Wheatens might be cute as puppies but as they get older, they just get more and more lovely. It was really refreshing to be able to see and learn about both the mum and dad of a litter and isn't something that I've ever seen or been able to do before.
After about two hours we felt we'd taken up enough of this nice guys time. It hadn't dragged, he hadn't gone on and we didn't feel that we outstayed our welcome. The visit was more I think for the breeders to decide whether or not they thought the dog would be going to a good home and whether P would want a dog from these people. P agreed to call him the following weekend to arrange when she could come down and pick up her puppy. It was great for me to be able to see them and I was equally as smitten by the dogs energy and affection. We headed back into town to grab some lunch and decided on the White Hart pub.
I always like the notion of pub grub but invariably it never delivers the goods. Things weren't looking good when I spied that the chef wasn't even in his 20's and that none of the cutlery matched on the table we sat at. It didn't matter though because when the food arrived (we ordered the daily special - steak & guinness pie with chips and peas) it was fantastic. My first fork avoided the chips and pie and went straight for the peas. Peas are never done quite the way I like them but these were spot on. I leaned my head down and muttered "the peas are excellent!". The portion was generous, the chunky chips cooked to golden perfection and the pie magnificent. The suet pastry was delicious and I couldn't fault the filling. No gristle, fat or measly meat allocation. Even the draught coke that came with it was first rate. At one point I went back to the bar to get a refill of coke and told the landlord how excellent the food was. He seemed genuinely pleased by my praise and so he should have been because I'm a fussy bastard and this was damn good.
We skipped dessert as I wanted to try a Somerset cream tea and thought we'd have a quick walk to burn off lunch, get some fresh air and create a little room for the scones, cream and jam. Found a nice little lake, which we wandered around before trying to find this cheese making place that we'd seen on the net. No joy and we think it had either shut down or was closed due to being out of season. As we were quite close, we decided to head up to the cheddar gorge. As we approached the landscape became a lot more peppered with rocky outcrops and stone walls were a lot more common. The route we took brought us winding down the Cheddar Gorge and it was certainly a sight to behold. The rock faces at certain points really did seem to jut out into the road and it was amazing how in this day and age of the nanny state and over rampant health and safety advice that the public could basically park up and head off up a ridiculously steep, mountain goat suitable, path. It was one of the few places where it was exactly like the falling rocks signpost. The angles shown on that sign are just right to the incline of the rock faces we were driving past, awesome.
The village at the bottom of the gorge looked very commercialised so after turning round and driving back up the gorge decided that we might as well start the long drive home. We'd had no luck finding a cream tea place and as it was nearing 4.30 thought it unlikely that we'd get one if we did find a place. Had thought the traffic might be worse but it wasn't. It kept flowing and it seemed to take even less time to get back. In reality it was the same amount of time but it seemed quicker. Stopped only once at a service station for a whizz, McD's milkshake and a cheeseburger. I wasn't sure whether my mate would want to go out that night and had texted him en route to see what he fancied doing. Just as we pulled up at P's, he replied and we agreed to head out. So far I'd had a great day.
I drove straight to his, collected him and then on down to mine. He waited in the car while I raced in, sloshed some water and soap in my pits, sprayed up, slapped on some eau de toilette, fixed my hair, ironed a t-shirt and hurried back out. Brother had joined us and we headed into town. Thought we'd get a few drinks before heading off to Greenwich to catch the film, Shooter. The two guys started drinking and every round I got them, I also included a shot. By the end they had put away a fair tally. Black sambuca, Raspberry flavoured vodka, Absinthe, Goldschlager, a flaming lamborghini (FL), another absinthe and finally another FL. I was wearing my "tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes" t-shirt which seemed to be getting an amazing amount of interest and as the drinks increased, so did the laughter. These flaming lamborghinis were incredible.
Basically the barman pours a shot of Kahlua into a martini glass and hands you a straw. He then gets another barman to hold a shot glass of blue curacao and a shot glass of baileys. Finally he holds a glass of black sambuca which he warms with a lighter before putting the lighter in the glass to set it on fire. He then adds the flaming liquid to the martini glass and the person starts drinking through the straw. While this is happening, the other barman tips in the two shots of drink that he is holding. When the martini glass is empty, it is flipped over, the straw trapped underneath and the final fumes sucked up. When done the barman reaches over, puts a hand on either side of your head and shakes it from side to side. It's pretty entertaining to watch and certainly had an impact on the two guys. It wasn't cheap though and along with two coronas and a red bull came to £38.
It was time to head off and the guys decided for a final shot. I slapped down £12 and said to the barman knock up the best thing you can for that x2. He basically put together another two FL's (the second one they had) for the money. My brother did the first and high fived the barman afterwards. My mate got ready to dive in and looked at me with a little hesitancy.
"Have you got my back?" he said. "Always" I replied and he dived in. It was tough for him. I saw the level of the liquid in the glass fall and then rise again as he couldn't take it all down in one go. Hardly surprising really as it is effectively four shots in total. He sucked again and most of went down with some coming out of his mouth and into his waiting hand. He did it though and received a hearty clap on the back. Even one of the bouncers came over to find out what it had been like. They were both charged to the max now and we left to head off to the cinema. They were probably far too pissed to be heading anywhere but what the hell. There was much singing/screaming in the car to Whitesnake, John Farnham and Scorpions. We got to the cinema and got the tickets. I could see they were feeling the effects now but told my mate that as his birthday wasn't until Sunday (10 minutes away by this point) that he should have a cinema hotdog before turning 35. Three hot dogs and three cokes in an apparent combo deal came to £17.25!
Moved into the auditorium and I made sure to find three seats away from others, with me in the middle to keep an eye on them. I turned to my mate and asked how he was. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being great and 1 being dead, he was a 2. We decided it might be better to leave now and they both admitted later that it was unlikely they would have even made it through the trailers to the opening credits. Got to the car but I knew the countdown had started. Pulled into a nearby hotel car park as my mate knew that he needed to be sick. Brother thought he could hold it in despite falling into a bush whilst trying to offer encouragement and got back in the car. Meanwhile my mate waited for the bile burps to subside before depositing his stomach in the bushes.
Realising that my brother was now a ticking time bomb (him and my mate have similar alcohol thresholds so if one blows, it's likely the other will) I blatted back to drop off my mate. As we came through Deptford my brother told me that we needed to stop. There wasn't really anywhere that I could. I got through some lights and pulled up but a look into the back of the car revealed a wide eyed stare from my brother and some chunder over his legs. It wasn't a full discharge and we hadn't heard the full retching sound but it was enough that he'd actually chundered in the back of my car. There was a little annoyance as I had tried to encourage him to make himself sick in the hotel car park earlier but he didn't want to. Oh well there was nothing to do now so I decided to leave him in the back and hurry to drop off my mate.
Dropping him off was funny as he dropped his phone when getting out of the car, bent over to pick it up and then stumbled forward to head butt the door frame. Waved him off and started the race home. Bro was flopping around in the back seat now and every corner would either result in his head hitting the window or slamming off the seat upholstery. About half way home he blew, big time. I could hear the retching and sound of liquid hitting liquid which worryingly told me it was already collecting on the floor. I dared not look back and desperately tried to remember if there was a ridge or lip under the drivers seat as I didn't want a sea of chunder rolling underneath my feet when I applied the brake. Trapped in the back of a three door car was possibly the worst place that one could be sick but at least is wasn't in the front and maybe if I ignored it, it would go away. The smell was like the top floor of Inferno's in Clapham and combined with this I was busting for a piss so badly that I started to get cold. I continued driving and by now my brother was laying across the seat with his face buried in the reversible gillet that I love and keep in the back of the car.
Five minutes from the front door and he blew again, decorating the other side of the back seat. "for fuck's sake bro, you're head's in my gillet" was all I could respond with. I pulled up and then attempted to get him out of the back. He was all arms and legs and the vomit on him was only serving to create a pleasant muriel on the pillar and back of my seat. When he was out, he collapsed into the gutter and begged to be left there. If I wasn't a little stressed about wanting to get him safely indoors, it would have been comical. In the end I had to resort to putting my arms underneath his armpits and dragging him up. We staggered along to the front like entrants in a surreal three legged race and managed to get inside. I stripped him down to his boxers and laid him in the recovery position on the living room floor. At one point I moved him and he was sick again. Most of it I managed to get into a waiting bucket but not being able to control him because of the way I was positioned, he slumped forward head first into the bucket, tipping it over and spilling some of the contents over him and my arms. If felt like something from a war film, almost like the end of Red Dawn. Here I was with my arms round his shoulders, holding him upright and both of us covered in shit, well ok sick.
I made sure he was sleeping properly, cleared up the chunder off the living room floor and decided to venture outside to look in the back of the car. I had no intention of cleaning it up but I thought I should see it. It was like when Eric Bana in Black Hawk Down looks in the back of the Humvee after they have driven across Mogadishu. Someone had let off a fully loaded chunder bomb in the tight confines of my back seat. Man it was everywhere. Tomato here, sausage there. I didn't even bother putting the steering lock on. Steal the car if you want it, though I would love to have seen the face of a crim if he'd got in and then looked in the back seat. My final, lasting image was that of a lump of sausage sitting in a lake of clear bile, pooling in my gillet. I stayed with my brother for about an hour or so to ensure that his wasn't going to be sick again in his sleep, before hitting my bed. It had been a long but fun day.
Around 9ish my brother sheepishly put his head round my bedroom door. "What happened?" he enquired as he slumped down against the wall. All he could remember was leaving the bar and nothing else. I relayed to him what had happened and took him outside to see the carnage. Thinking his reaction would be priceless I filmed it on my phone camera. His face was a picture as he blankly stared into the void that was the back seat before uttering "Man, that's a lot of sausage".
Even though we were heading round to P's for a Lost fest he did me proud by getting stuck into getting it cleaned. I moved the car round the back and he donned the marigolds, got a bucket of disinfectant and began scooping up the remains of the hot dogs and the quiche, that he'd eaten before coming out. I had thought that maybe I was irresponsible for getting both of them so completely smashed but it was a fun memory for everyone. We aren't dead and in the boxes yet and it isn't like we regularly go out and get drunk to this level. I also think it's good for my brother. My mate might understand the need to make himself sick but that's only come from the experience of getting truly hammered before. My brother has to taste those experiences himself and I wouldn't want them dulled by going out with more sensible individuals. He was cleaning the car up and ulimately the smell, which even now is quite powerful, will fade long before the memory of his 'old faithful' routine does. How he plans to top this though, I don't think I want to know.
We headed over to P's slightly later to allow for the clean up operation and cracked on with a sausage and egg baguette. It was a lovely warm day and we dined in the garden to catch some rays. Brother was fine. Naturally he was hungry and wolfed the brunch down with ease. With settled down to watch a couple of those Bear Ghrylls 'Born Survivor' programmes which really are great entertainment. It's rare nowadays in the quagmire of reality shows, 'I'm so fat I ate my husband' documentaries or musical auditions to find a prog. that genuinely amazes you but these do. They remind me of the great mini series that the BBC ran a few years back. It was called Hunting Chris Ryan and basically had Chris trying to avoid capture and complete a mission whilst being hunted by bona fide pathfinder paratroopers and american special forces. It was wicked but sadly only had three episodes.
Anyway Bear's exploits make for great tv. The premise is of him being dropped in a series of inhospitable terrains to escape from. The one that we watched showed him in the Everglades and some of his survival hints are brilliant. Working out directions by the very slow, flowing movement of the 50 mile wide river that makes up the Everglades, his catching, killing and eating of a turtle and demonstration of the dangers of sink holes in the mud by actually jumping in one to then show how you get out. Brilliant. It could be on for a purchase list if they release a DVD box set of it.
Followed this with six back to back episodes of Lost. It was good to see it again and it's amazing how you manage to put it far from your mind when away from it. It had some quite big reveals which was impressive though this time I was more frustrated at Jack's blind faith in Juliet and Lock's continuing gullibilty and stupidity when dealing with his dad and his utter selfishness at blowing up the submarine. Ok, he might not want to go back home where he would be a cripple but he doesn't have to stop everyone else from doing so. There were a couple of filler episodes but I guess we are mid season and that always happens then. Overall it's still good, though they are skating on the edge of losing me. Had some carbonara for dinner which was lovely. Two packs of bacon, three breasts of chicken, mushrooms, onions, a grossman sauce and two cartons of single cream. With a healthy sprinkling of cheese it was great and the chicken added something a little extra.
Also managed to catch a programme about Michael Bisping, the British winner of the 3rd or was it 4th series of the UFC's Ultimate Fighter. He came across as quite a nice guy for a fighter. Quite self effacing and funny. I hope he does well and goes far.
Overall it was a good weekend in which I seemed to do an awful lot. Got all the way down to Somerset, shared P's excitement with the puppies, saw in mates birthday with a staggering amount of alcohol and drunkeness, even if it was just from them, generated a wicked memory and caught up with Lost. Certainly shows that when you've got things to do, you can cram a lot in.
Talk soon.
Sunshine in more ways than one - 10/04/07
Another busy week at work. Only having the four days instead of five intensified what we had to do, especially in the first three days as most of our clients seemed determined not to be in work on the Thursday. This was also the week that we needed to get our little gifts out to a selection of our clients. They weren't anything massive, just some tasteful and fun eggs from Hotel Chocolat, combined with a cleverly written and humourous piece, eggs-alting (see what I did there) the benefits of using us. I had to do some major wrapping and ribbon tying one day which was fun. By the end of the day I was pretty smooth at wrapping boxes and had learnt the basic fundamental to neat, smart wrapping. Use the least amount of paper. My edges were sharp, the sellotape used minimally and the wide ribbon placed and knotted very tidily. We had a few clients who demonstrated they still had some humanity and thanked us but on the whole the majority were too arrogant or conceited to offer a little gratitude.
At least the traffic in the morning was noticeably quieter due to the school holidays. It was also pretty strange when driving home on Thursday. I left the office late and the roads felt eerily quiet. I was surprised at how big a deal Easter seemed to be and the roads almost had an air of Christmas Eve about them. Either way by the end of the week I knew I was knackered and was looking forward to the huge lay in that I was planning for that Friday.
The animated film Prince of Egypt was on the TV on Friday afternoon and I wanted to watch it again after having heard the music from it a couple of times on streaming soundtracks. It was good to see again and I enjoyed the music. There did seem to be an element of hypocrisy within it, or is that the hypocrisy of religion. The film starts with Moses placed in the Nile to escape the evil of man (the pharoah) who orders the death of all first born males. Moses grows up, leaves his adopted family, wanders into the wilderness, discovers the burning bush and returns back to Egypt. To then free his people God releases all manner of unpleasantries on the Egyptians including the taking of all first born children. Now this is a god acting like a man. Is this an example of an eye for an eye or should this be when one should turn the other cheek. Correct me as well if I'm wrong but this is a story in the Bible about the Jews/Hebrews which they like and believe in. So how come they believe in this story but not the ones which might not paint them in such a favourable light?
Headed out after this to see if anything was available in the video shop. The weather was really nice and it was good to feel the warmth of the sun again. I chided myself for not having made more of the day and then I thought well what would I have done? Just gone out for the sake of going out, I needed some shut eye. Hired out Ghost Recon Advanced Warrior 2 (GRAW2) on the Xbox 360 and then picked up my brother. It was Good Friday and we fancied something different for tea. He'd been wanting another pizza to put the memory of the Meateor to bed and we decided to go the whole hog on two large pizza's from Pizza Hut. Ahh, the gluttony of relaxing on the living room floor with two pizza boxes open, a couple of sides and a glass of chilled Pepsi. Followed this with some two player split screen GRAW2 which was entertaining once we'd got the hang of the controls and menus etc.
I played a little more GRAW2 on Saturday morning but decided that I just didn't like it. It was too overly complicated. I'm no simpleton but there was just so many boxes, different colours and distractions on screen to what is actually happening that it's hard to concentrate or see the task at hand. The explosions are wonderful but the ordering of team members isn't as intuitive as Rainbow Six and the gameplay certainly not as entertaining. I understand that it's meant to be a realistic combat simulator but think that it's realism makes too much of a sacrifice into it's gameplay.
Headed into town for a haircut and to put some money away. Had a nice chat with my hairdressers and even got a dinner date round their place which naturally I'm looking forward. I also handed over deposits for the paintballing that he is arranging for mid May. At one point this older friend of theirs came in to say hi. He was in the area to buy a wedding dress for his daughter. My hairdresser asked if she was still marrying the bloke she'd dated for 5 years. The guy replied, with what seemed almost like pride, that she was in fact marrying his best mate who she'd dated for a year. When jokingly asked if the ex had been invited to the wedding, the dad said no and that the new guy had seen to him with a 5 iron. Nice eh.
Ok, I don't know the story behind it and am only making assumptions but what a lovely girl it is who dates and marries someone's best mate and thinks it perfectly ok for the new guy to have beaten up her ex. I'm so glad not to be in 'that' world where violence and retribution are just so commonplace and a woman sees nothing fundamentally wrong for her husband to have the kind of streak in him that would be able to take a golf club to a former best mate over a girl. Best of all though is how if this silly little slag ever receives a slap or some kind of domestic violence from her new husband how surprised she would act. 'How could he hit me, I never knew he would be like that' is what her response would be. The signs were there love, you married a thug.
Shot up to Bluey after this to mooch around and pick up my brother. Saw some good summery stuff in the shops and I guess I'll have to start thinking about buying some bits for the hols soon. I know I can pick up a fair chunk of stuff out there but treating yourself to some new holiday clothes is all part of the fun. As the roads had the previous day so to did Bluey feel strangely half empty. Maybe the Easter weekend and sunshine kept everyone out at family BBQ's. Saw a demonstration of Guitar Hero II for the Xbox 360 which looks fun. It's been getting really good reviews and had I a few more friends, active social life etc looks like the perfect thing to get if you had a few mates round with some beers.
The Calzaghe-Manfredo fight was on this night and not liking Manfredo after the Contender favouritism that was shown to him was keen to see Calzaghe hammer the shit out of him. Unfortunately we also wanted to go out but the fight was right in the middle of the night. Thankfully between the three of us we had a VCR to record it on. The advancement of science eh. We all get rid of our grainy, dodgy video players for crystal picture DVD yet have to return to old trusty when the chips are down. Anyway picked up mate and along with brother headed over to Blackheath.
It was another fun night. The girls are all entertaining and good company to be with. There is a mutual friendship which means conversation is easy and relaxed and laughter normally very high. I don't like doing shouts but hi to L, M and F if they are reading this. The music was good, the drink was flowing for the others and the place was rammed.
Some of the guys in these places continue to amaze me. We'd left the girls while we went to get some drinks and upon returning only 5-10 minutes later found a guy hovering around them like a gnat at a barbeque. We gave the girls their drinks and started chatting to them yet he still hung around, trying to crowd in. In the end one of the girls had to throw her arms around my neck to give him the biggest hint possible. On another occasion two of the girls were dancing when one of them jumped up and said that this guy had put his hand right up her skirt. She glared at the back of his head and carried on dancing. Sure enough I watched as this guys hand, acting seemingly independant from the rest of his body, started to wander over her arse again. He was facing forward and dancing with his mates yet his hand was moving like a completely different entity. I imagine if you'd said anything he would have responded with an innocent what? Is it any wonder I find it hard to interact with girls when their impressions of guys in bars and nightclubs must be formed by interacting with these kind of arseholes.
The night came to an end and we were left with the dilemma of six people to get home safely. Six in my small car is by no means ideal so I wasn't delighted but my brother hopped in the boot, the three girls in the back and me and mate up front. Dropped them off, popping into anothers for a quick cuppa which was nice before shooting back to catch the boxing. You can't watch late night boxing without fast food but the queue for KFC was amazing. Tried to navigate round the back of it to see what looked like a cookout taking place on the pavement outside this club. Someone had taken an oil drum style BBQ and just started cooking up mounds of chicken for the leaving patrons of this club. The bare faced cheek to do something so obviously illegal and contravening food standards made the place look like down town Mogadishu. Amazingly whilst queuing at the McD's drive thru we saw the same thing happening and it was practically on their land. The Old Kent Road is certainly a cosmopolitan place and even at 3.30am there were still hordes of people milling around.
Anyway the boxing was a bit of a farce really. Credit due to Frank Warren for hyping it for all it's worth and maybe it will help boost his profile in the US but Calzaghe was in another league to Peter Manfredo. I never liked Peter when he was in The Contender and felt he always seemed to get unfair treatment, almost like he was being groomed for bigger things. Calzaghe pure and simple outboxed him and Manfredo didn't throw one noteworthy punch. He might have bemoaned the ref for stopping the fight but he wasn'r replying with anything and when a ref sees a boxing exchange so clearly one sided, what else is he to do? Peter should consider himself lucky that he didn't leave the ring in a stretcher and with what little bone there is left in his nose not being broken again. The Amir Khan fight which was on the undercard was equally under-whelming and one sided and I don't think the night did the sport of boxing any favours.
Easter Sunday was a family affair to begin with and we headed over to my Aunt's in Bromley. Sometimes I go to these family events and don't seem to really engage with anyone but I was chatting away to my Aunt and Uncle who done the Inca trail with my cousin, who is now in the Galapagos Islands. Although the oldest people walking the four day trail, they saw it all the way through to Machu Pichu. I really enjoy talking to people about their travels, particularly when they've gone to somewhere as fascinating as what I think Machu Pichu must be. We all ate in the garden, which for me is the first time this year and it felt good to be able to relax and feel the sun's warmth on my face.
Left there about 8ish and having taken a drive back through the town to see it rammed full of people quickly changed my shoes, slapped on some eau de toilette and headed back into town. Brother and I went to our normal haunt, not expecting a great deal but just wanting to be out looking at some pretty girls, of which there were quite a few. There was one lovely brunette in the bar but she must have had the eyes of Laura Mars for no sooner had I quietly said to my brother 'wow, she's lovely' she turned round to show me her back. I hadn't pointed, shouted, overtly stared or had to have my jaw put back in but she must have known. She moved around the club and at one point later on she was standing next to me but the 'stay away' signs were evident and within 10 minutes it seemed a friend had turned up to bail her out. I must stress that I wasn't doing anything to make her feel uncomfortable and wasn't considering attempting to make a move.
I really don't know how people chat each other up in bars/clubs. If you are the one starting it, every second that you aren't saying something feels like hours. You can't really relax and enjoy the conversation in the way it might normally flow. Everything is, or at least seems to be forced for you to do your best to keep her entertained. Like a computer refreshing every 60 seconds, you can see her thinking am I still interested in talking to this guy, is he boring me yet, what does he want? If they look away for the merest of seconds you start looking for an exit strategy to get out before they have the chance to blow you out. When introduced by friends to new girls I've got a chance to impress because they'll give me the time to stretch my conversational wings without wandering off muttering 'weird'. Maybe because I'm not trying to chat them up I can be more like the normal me. Knowing this doesn't make any difference though. Chatting someone up in a club doesn't allow you to be the normal you because deep down you both now that the first and foremost reason that you are talking to them is because you want them to like you because you find them attractive.
Came home deciding that really the only way to do it was to be hammered when going out. This way I still love everyone and want to have a great time but if a woman doesn't truly bowl me over or keep me entertained I can turn round and simply forget them. I don't mean this nastily, I just mean that my attention span shortens and I concentrate on having immediate fun rather than the hoping something will happen.
Monday was the usual washing and stuff. Playing GRAW 2 got me motivated to dig out Rainbow Six and also watch Black Hawk Down again. It's a good film with some great action scenes and a lot of good acting from a bevy of familiar faces. Saw Sunshine that night at the pictures. It started off well with an intelligent premise and characters behaving reasonably sensible but then half way through it went silly, ditching the realism and turning into a thriller, spook fest. There were some clever bits in it but that second half just plunged it into predictable, menial pap which if anything was more disappointing than annoying. I also don't think that the lead guy, Cillian Murphy, can pull off the lead role. He's weedy looking and just doesn't have the weight or resolve to make you believe he could be heroic.
I had some negative thoughts on my site levelled at me during the week that I was too honest and that it puts people off. I think some people look on open-ness as weakness and judge my revealing attitude against there own, more guarded, privacy settings. Fair comment, everyone is entitled to an opinion and the right to reveal as much, or as little, as they want. This opinion was pleasantly offset against the three girls telling me that they had seen the site and really liked it, agreed with a fair chunk of what I talked about and didn't see me as a bitter, twisted woman hater.
That's the thing about what I write. I don't expect it to appeal to everyone. There's probably only about 15% of the readers who will read it, understand me and like what they read. That's fine, I'm comfortable with that. What is nice then when some do say they like it is that I haven't tried to manufacture their approval. I've not dumbed it down to a level of vanilla pap that appeals to everyone or filled it with endlessly cheery tosh that would be hard to dislike. It's warts and all. Sane and insane, considered and wildly kneejerk. To me this is a more honest portrayal of who a person truly is and what I believe a blog/ site should offer. Their liking of it added another strand of sunshine to my week.
Take care.
A succulent slice of peach - 02/04/07
I'm sure you'll be delighted to know that my foot problem pretty much cleared up this week. God knows what it was, probably a bite I guess. It's amazing how when something starts like this you thinks it's nothing to worry about and are confident that you're body will deal with it. Then it gets to a certain point and you think 'maybe I do need to investigate this a bit more seriously' and then a day or two later you can see the body is starting to fight it and you are on the mend. The body is amazing isn't it? It identified the problem, contained the area, flooded it with white blood cells and with very little help from me, bar a few ibuprofen, dealt with the problem.
Had a whole morning of meetings on Wednesday. It was a long slog. They weren't technically difficult but being in client mode can be draining. That afternoon I got to drive back in the Focus ST and it was pretty impressive. Such a smooth, comfortable ride. A great, re-assuring delivery of power right across the range of gears. I couldn't really hammer it as it's still being worn in but I surged up to 4,000 rpm at some points and that was enough to let me know that there was some real mumbo under the bonnet. The steering was light yet you still felt connected to the road and the gearbox a lovely smooth change that was a pleasure to use. I was succumbed by what a great car it was and mine felt particularly jarring when I got back in it. It felt like I'd got back into a go kart with it's softer (and obviously close to being knackered) brakes, rather more stubborn gearbox and firm, to put it mildly, ride. Who could ask more from a car than what the Focus ST delivers.
Got an email telling me that I'd received a message on my Faceparty account. I knew it wouldn't be but I couldn't help but hope it was from that girl. Terrible weakness I know but the thorn is still there and only slowly working it's way free. Needless to say it was from an illiterate foreigner saying how they 'wanted to make friends for good relations, blah, blah....................'
After a long-ish week Friday arrived and I rather innocuously mentioned how KFC seemed to be trialling some new BBQ coated honey chicken bites. Some people thought this was a carefully orchestrated plan to have a fast food lunch. Cherish the thought, though everyone seemed eager enough to place their order and KFC is what we had. The honey / bbq bites were ok. Not quite as sickly sweet as they might have been and I do confess to my nostrils flaring and mind reeling at the memory of the BBQ sauce overload that accompanied the fabled Meateor. It was a good feed but combined with the enormous amount of Pepsi that I drunk with it only served to make me knackered through the afternnon.
After hearing his show a few weeks back I'd done a little research into when John O'Callaghan would next be DJ'ing in London. He was in town this Friday night, playing at the relaunch of Peach, which was taking place at the Heaven nightclub underneath Charing Cross. For those in the know Heaven is normally a gay nightclub but on this occasion it was effectively going to be a straight night. Headed home, jumped in the bath, sprayed some glitter in my hair, picked up my brother and headed back into town. After some of the previously poor nights I'd had clubbing (Armin at Brixton Academy, Sean Tyas in Vauxhall) I'd been indecisive about making the effort to come back into town.
The night didn't start great as once again the Limehouse Link was closed from about 10.00pm onwards creating a monstrous traffic jam as cars tried to make into London via different routes. It's incredible that the Limehouse Link tunnel is one of the most expensive roads in England yet always seemed to be shut. What's wrong with the bloody thing, why can't it just be reliably open. The amount of traffic and delay that it was adding was causing my temper to boil off the scale and I was expecting it to be a foretaste of another disapointing night. We eventually managed to battle our way through it my heading down Narrow Street in Limehouse and shooting across the mouth of Rotherhithe tunnel to then drop onto a virtually deserted Highway. This ran me nice and easily into the heart of London and onto the Embankment. I always try to park in a similar place when I go uptown. I guess like everyone has their favourite place to park in Bluewater, I also have one for the west end. Amazingly we managed to find a parking spot in the area I like, meaning we were no more than a two minute walk from the club.
A final spray of deodorant and application of aftershave, double check the pockets, that the car was properly locked and a packet of chewing gum inserted into the waste band of my boxers as some clubs don't like you to take in chewing gum. Some might need drugs to get them through a night of dancing but for me it's chewing gum. There wasn't much of a queue going in but I needn't have worried as the club wasn't empty. It must have been about half full, which felt comfortable and not too cramped. Getting in there about 11.30 ish meant that there wasn't a rush to hit the dance floor as John wasn't on until 3.15 so my brother and I chilled, had a few red bulls and just chatted away. There were a few pretty girls to look at and not being full of ridiculously young cybers it felt a little more relaxed and not so dance pretensious. I like people who dress up for these kind of events but they do invariably seem to spend most of the time chatting rather than actually dancing which you'd think given their outfit efforts they'd prefer doing.
After about an hour or so we eased our way onto the dance floor to let the beat get into our bones. A couple of people stopped to compliment me on the t-shirt I was wearing (my Geek one) which was pretty cool and the tunes being dropped were pretty good. I discovered that despite having taken it with me the batteries were failing on my lightwand and hence I wouldn't be able to share with the world my incredible lightstick. It lived free for about half an hour but I realised it was not to be it's night and returned it to the safety of one of my leg pockets.
There was this annoying drunken arse who seemed to be moving round the dance floor. He was dressed in city clobber and was smashed out of his mind, just aimlessly shuffling around. At one point he leaned in so close behind me that I thought he was gay. I turned and said rather forcefully "whats wrong mate" and he just stared at me with a million mile stare. We moved away but he seemed to be circulating and after bothering practically everyone else seemed to find us again. I love getting into the vibe with a dancing crowd but when someone keeps invading my body space and getting in my way, I can get a little frustrated. As we moved closer to when John O'Callaghan came on I was aware that I wouldn't want him near me if I needed to really start ripping it up. By now my brother and I were elbowing him if he leaned in too close but it seemed to make no difference. At one point he just leaned his head on the back of this black guy who I thought would turn round and clock him but didn't. I'm not a violent man but the thought of me hitting him and trying to put him down genuinely filled my head, as did the idea of performing a public service by dragging him from the dancefloor by his throat. I'm not meaning to sound like some kind of dancefloor police but he was incapable of dancing and was impeeding everyone else's chance of enjoying the dancing.
We moved further round the dancefloor until we were to the right of the raised platform in the middle of the dancefloor and thankfully didn't come within annoying range again that night. Girls are really hard to figure out in these places, even harder than normal clubs. Some smile but you are not sure if is at you or because they are enjoying themselves. At one point I was dancing on the raised platform and the girl who'd been dancing next to me for the last 10 minutes out of the blue offered me a sip of her newly opened bottle of water. I declined and offered a chewing gum in return which she declined. I was pleasantly surprised by her unsolicited generosity but was this an opening gambit or just one member of the dance community being friendly to another?
At another point this rather sexy brunette had been side-step shuffling with her friend and a couple of other guys while I was getting into my dancing. She'd looked over a couple of times and I'd smiled but I was beginning to really get into my dancing, which can be quite a sight. As she walked past to get onto the raised section she stopped to ask whether I had glue in my hair or something. I said no it's glitter, do you like it? She replied yes and then got up onto the raised section. I carried on dancing, as she did, but a couple of times I saw her look over but again not enough to know whether it was interest or idle curiosity. I also thought she was with this other guy. Apparently not though as about an hour later I saw her again with a completely different guy.
It's really tough. You want to be in an environment of friendly people who would naturally be smiling but you can't assume that no one is looking. I certainly don't go to these clubs looking to pull anything (not that I imagine I could anyway) but rather enjoy the music and dancing and maybe as a bonus see some pretty girls. It would seem though that some people do go for that. Maybe it's just an evolution of clubbing. My specific 'dance' clubs are the younger generation normal clubs. I'm always amazed by the people chatting in the chill out areas when the headline DJ's are mashing it up on the decks.
Anyway John came on at 3.15 and was a class act. The tunes he played were outstanding and had my brother and I really going for it. I'm not being arrogant but with this kind of music, I think I ain't a bad dancer as I really let the music take me over. There will be whooping, hollering, arms in the air for the breakdowns and some major movement when the beat drops back in. I also like how when we start to really 'wind it up' how it seems to raise the level of those dancing in our immediate surroundings. When you get the right people, dancing can be quite infectious and I think seeing a couple of people really going for it only encourages you to raise your game. The DJ took us on a wicked journey and we repaid his efforts by giving it all we had. I was getting knackered, especially with my time off from the gym but each tune would just push me on to greater heights. At one point I even felt the need to quote some lines from 300 to my brother to keep us pumped. He came off at 4.45 and despite the next DJ being pretty good we both found that by 5.00 our legs were beginning to fail us. We'd had a good night and the music had delivered so left the clubs with our heads held high.
Grabbed a pint of milk each from a late night shop on the way back to the car and collapsed into the seats with aching limbs. Needless to say a night out in town, especially when clubbing, wouldn't be complete without a trip to the tea hut. Burger, tea, chilled tunes on the car stereo, first rays of daylight coming up over the heath. Is there a better way to end a night?
By the time I got back home, washed my face, teeth and hair to prevent covering my pillow in glitter it must have been about 7 in the morning but there is something truly delicious about clambering into bed at that time. Your body is aching from the exercise, your mind is tired yet you can hear the birds beginning to sing. It seems incredibly self indulgent that as the rest of the world wakes up you are deciding to go to sleep.
Didn't wake up until 3.00 in the afternoon and that felt great. The debate then started about what to do that evening. Brother and I were both in two minds. It was the end of the month, plenty of people would be out and maybe it would be a good chance for the two of us to bus it into town, get mashed up and then walk home. There again we were feeling a little tired, we'd already had one good night out and I did have the ingredients of a spag bol in the fridge and cupboard. It was a catch 22 situation. If we said Yes let's go out we knew our minds would say christ, I wish I was staying in for a quiet one and enjoying a nice meal. We also that if we went out, there wouldn't be any pretty girls to see and we'd end up wishing we'd stayed in. On the flipside we knew that by agreeing to stay in we were almost giving up on a part of living and that the bars would be stacked to the ceiling with sweet little honeys, desperate to talk to great guys like ourselves!
It was a tough one but we decided to stay in and get a couple of DVD's. The dinner was excellent, my addition of cream really does lift it to amazing heights, and we watched the first of the two DVD's after we'd watched a lot more Saturday night TV than we had expected to. We'd hired out Jackass 2 and as much as I enjoyed the first film I wasn't sure if this would hit the same level. It did, in all the departments. It had laugh out loud moments, hand over mouth in sick yet still funny moments and 'christ, that's amazing' moments. Stand outs for me were the Anaconda's in the ball pit, the ball firing crowd clearer and the direct fart into Steve O's see through, fully encompassing helmut. A really funny and entertaining film and I wish we'd watched it with a few beers and maybe in the company of others before heading out.
There was no motorsport on Sunday but I was keen to check out how Britain was doing at the world cycling championships. I began to get into this more from seeing it at the Olympics and also seeing how strong the British team were getting. It's a great spectator sport on the telly. Everything is clearly visible within the velodrome and it's a lot more exciting and dramatic than some other sports. We ended up winning eight gold medals in the championships and just smashing the hell out of everyone else. Highlights would be Victoria Pendleton's three gold medals. She comes across as a really nice person who isn't arrogant or cocky yet has the talent to hammer practically everyone on the track, Bradley Wiggings won a gold medal in the pursuit event. It's the one where the two competitors start on either side of the track and have to try and catch each other. In the final event where you'd expect his challenger to be the creme he'd caught him by the 2750 metre mark of a 4km race. Astonishing pace. Finally Chris Hoy's gold in the team and individual events were great as well. It's so refreshing to see a sport where our team is so dominant, well organised and motivated. It's also good that because it hasn't yet been media saturated the presenters can talk to the athletes like they are normal people rather than the slightly aloof manner that some of the track and field people have. A great display by the British team. It's brilliant to have something that we are genuine world beaters in.
Watched the second DVD that afternoon which was The Guardian. It starred Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher in a film about Naval Swimmers in the US coast guard. The reviews had said it wasn't earth shattering and it wasn't but it was entertaining, exciting and enjoyable. Finally that evening there was a programme on about the Falklands War as it's coming up to the 25th anniversary of it starting.
I do remember the Falklands war. I was 11 at the time and just in the zone for being fascinated by our goings on over there and all thgings military. I was always impressed by Britain doing something impressive and simply going down there to kick them out. A lot is said about how Thatcher only did it to make herself popular but I don't subscribe to that bullshit. Bottom line, she knew what was right and wrong and the Falkland Islands were British, wanted to remain British and had been invaded by an unwelcome aggressor. We couldn't wait on diplomacy, which would never had led to anything, we needed to just get down there. I shed no tears over us sinking the Belgrano either. They went to war with us, war is nasty and people will die. They might have been outside the exclusion zone but they could have turned round at any moment and besides it did the job of keeping the Argentinian Navy out of the war completely. It's good to see how 25 years later the country is doing well for itself and virtually self sufficient from the money it makes in selling fishing licences for its rich waters.
Thanks for checking in and I wish you all a very happy Easter.
A swollen foot, a sweet car and 300 arse-kicking spartans - 26/03/2007
It was a busy week at work. Not so much for me as my clients were ticking along nicely but more for another of our clients. It required some of the other guys to stay late working on the job and kept me company for what I was up to. I had decided that I wanted to add some more photos to my site and maybe split them between two galleries. One just of myself through the ages and another made up from the two Tidy dance weekenders that my brother and I went on. They weren't stunning or even ones that made me look incredibly sexy (some of my brother were pretty cool) but the site is a nice home for images of me so why not add a few more.
It meant scanning in some of the photos and then transferring them over to my PC. Unfortunately there were then issues when I came to load them up as I inadvertently hadn't saved some of them as jpegs. I was a little frustrating as I lost all the titles and little quips that I'd put in to accompany the pictures. Not only didn't the site like the images but also then 'spazzed out' by asking me to re-enter my web design as if it was starting over again.
This spooked me to say the least as I had visions of it wiping everything off my site and me having to start afresh, which to be honest I don't know if I could do. I quickly opened another window and proceeded to cut and paste all of the copy into a word document in case I had to resort to loading it all back in. Needless to say it was quite a big document and a word count revealed that the total number of words on my site was over 236,000. Shit, that surprised even me. I emailed mr site support who said it would be ok to proceed and I would not lose everything. I did so and thankfully they were right. I know the site doesn't change lives or make a whole lot of difference in the grand scheme of things but I'm proud of it and it is to some extent my legacy. I don't mean that in some grandiose idea of it being a gift to civilization but rather that if I passed away and someone wanted to know who I was, or what I stood for, then they could find out.
My work colleague got her new car this week. She picked it up on Tuesday and brought it into the office. Few others got excited but I was stoked. I really like the car anyway but it just looks so cool and chunky. The headlights do this great rising and dipping motion when you first switch the car on, the engine has a deep purr with hint of a delicious warble when you dab the throttle, the alloys are big and great to look at, the sound system chucks it out and even has a jack to take a direct feed from an iPod. I even got her to drive it up and down the yard so I could see it in slow motion. It had a re-assuring presence, a feeling that it could poodle along nicely before exploding into action. The doors have a well built solidity to them, the Recaro seats grip you snugly and the dashboard lighting is super sexy. It's practical and sensible for her needs with a cracking sized boot and plenty of room in the rear but also capable of giving it some real welly and raising a childlike grin as you power round a bend and bury the throttle. I found myself repeatedly popping outside to look at it in differing lights as the sun went down and I'm looking forward to driving it when we go to a client meeting next week.
I seemed to develop a rash on my toes during the week which then seemed to develop into a blister on the underside of one of them. I wasn't sure what it was to begin with. I remember one night being half awake and scratching my toes until I practically went through the skin. I wasn't sure if it was a bite or my feet were simply protesting from being planted in my boots for so long. By Thursday afternoon the toe and front half of my foot had swollen up, it was warm to the touch and I could feel the pressure in it when I put weight on it. I even went into work on Friday wearing sandals as I thought maybe my feet weren't getting enough air to them. It sounds pretty horrible but it seemed to just come out of nowhere and take me by surprise.
Had thought of going to see the whether my local doctors had an open surgery on Saturday morning but a quick phone call revealed that they were closed. What difference would it make anyway. My brother had gone with a completely swollen foot a few years back and all they recommended was a blood test with the results to be discussed in six weeks time. Useless bastards, what do they care. If it isn't an easily diagnosable illness then they pull out the "have a blood test and if it hasn't killed you or gone away in six weeks we will maybe give it some thought" response. Headed round to the chemist who seems to have come on leaps and bound. They even have a small examining room. I discussed it with the chemist and showed her my foot. Just as doctors are nowadays unwilling to commit to something that could be proved wrong, chemists are even more so. In a shop full of drugs she seemed reluctant to recommend anything bar telling me to let the air get to it and take it easy. I bought some Ibuprofen and left it at that.
It felt funny in a way to be relieved of the guilt of not going to the gym. In a way because I knew I shouldn't go because of my foot it seemed to free my conscious and the fact that I'd got up reasonably early for a change meant I had most of the day to myself. Hit the bakers for some rolls and a jammie doughnut and headed up to the DVD store to see if anything was in. There wasn't but it felt good to go and look and feel that I had the day to entertain myself. Chilled back at base with the paper before deciding that I would spend the afternoon watching my all time favourite film. Was about an hour in when I began to feel a little tired and decided to enjoy a delicious afternoon nap.
I'd had my head down about 15 minutes when the doorbell went and one of my friends, who is married, turned up with their two kids. It was great to see them as I hadn't for some time but it was a surprise. I felt a bit of a mess as I just woken from a snooze but fixed them up a cuppa. They've got two boys, one 4 the other 1 and they were a handful but lovely. The one year old full of smiles while the four old is in the energetic and curious mode. How my friends managed to cope and do anything with them around is amazing. G would ask me a basic question like what have you been up to and as I'd start to answer I'd look at the four year old and then suddenly lunge forward as I was paranoid he was going to trip up or something. Kids also have this wonderous ability to go looking for stuff you've quickly crammed away to avoid embarrasement. I don't mean porn but rather old newspapers, maybe a jumper you'd left lying around and tried to discreetly bury under something to make the place look tidier. I think if you have them you certainly learn to multi task a lot quicker, or if a bloke the ability to do so. It was great to see them and their little ones and I've promised to make more of an effort to see them sooner. I must cook them my special dish soon.
Managed to grab another hour of shut eye once they'd left before heading up to Bluewater to hook up with brother to catch 300. Had a sit down burger at Tootsie's and then went into the film. I've always been fascinated by the battle of Thermopalyae and the Spartans. I loved the director's (Zack Snyder) re-working of Dawn of the Dead and the source work that the film was working from was Frank Miller's comic novel and he'd been responsible for Sin City. I knew the film would be all green screen, very stylised amd more like Miller's comic rather than an accurate interpretation of the actual events. The trailer for 300 has to be one of the best ones I'd seen recently what with it's wicked use of the Nine Inch Nails track 'Just like you imagined' coupled with some awesome footage and Leonidas' fantastic "This is Sparta!".
The film received an absolute pasting in the papers. The Times gave it 1 star and The Guardian only 2 so I went in with low expectations and the hope that it would at least deliver some good action. I was not disappointed. It was the best thing I have seen so far this year. The set-up was excellent by explaining a little about Spartan upbringing and their continual pursuit of fighting excellence and honour. It also showed that the film was going to be a little fantastical with it's clearly unreal wolf at the beginning. Like Sin City before it worked because it set up the ground rules of how the film would play. It wasn't going to be grounded in reality so you could flow with it's artistic side a lot easier. Many had complained that the film didn't explain characters but I think many people assume that characters have to be described with long and tedious talking and exposition. For me I can build a picture of someones character from how they act and what they do. I bonded with the king, his captain, the captains son and his friend and even the story teller.
The lighting and whole look of the film was awesome. The costumes and music both top notch and I enjoyed the writing. Ok it was very macho and again people have complained that it didn't deal with Spartans alledged homosexuality but why would it have to. Can't it just be entertaining rather than trying to address social change. The film showed women in a strong light and the Spartan Queen had an excellent role. The fight scenes however were what made the film and they were great. Initially they started by showing how the Spartan phalanx worked but that style of fighting doesn't lend itself to good film as it's very scrappy and closed in so they moved into more sweeping action scenes where you could witness considered attack moves being played out. What I felt was missing from films like Troy etc was that they showed you massive battles but just assumed that shots of people jostling was enough. You never engaged with the battles because you couldn't make out individuals fighting their own battles. This was almost like a computer game as the Spartans decimated the initial waves of grunts before progressing up through the pecking order to take on the King of Persia's finest warriors, The Immortals. With their complete face masks, all black outfits and double swords they looked fantastic and the fight scenes with them were very good.
I really liked the Spartan characters. They had some killer lines. I particularly like how the story teller responds to the king when asked about the 'scratch' he received in battle. "It's only an eye" he replies "god saw fit to provide me with a spare". The characters had honour, comraderie and a willingness to make sacrifices. Simple things but ones I love seeing in films. They fought with passion and valour. It was a great film and even the end credits were fantastic works of art, reminding me of the clever title sequence of Casino Royale. I loved the film and as well as realising that it would be a definite DVD purchase when it comes out, that I probably wouldn't mind seeing it again at the pictures. I realise that the beard stroking critics will say it's the kind of mindless trash that would appeal to dribbling fools like myself but I could see the quality, style and refreshing energy shining through and left the cinema pumped and thoroughly entertained. Bravo Mr Snyder, 2007 has at last got off to a good movie year.
Sunday was a lazyish day to try to recuperate some hours into the sleep bank but had to be up to catch the Spanish MotoGP at Jerez. Rossi romped it and it was a fairly processional race unfortunately. Started to watch my second favourite film in the afternoon but again felt the desire of an afternoon nap coming on so decided to act on that instead. Picked up brother that night from a large dinner 'n' dance that he'd gone to. I think he was hoping to have had a better night with a little more female sucess but despite getting in the zone and pulling out some killer moves on the dance floor hit nothing. I understood how he felt. You look forward to a big work's night out and the chance to impress but invariably nothing happens and everyone remains in their own little huddles. Oh well there's always Florida to look forward to and I keep pushing him to sort out a Faceparty account. Given his younger age and ability to articulate more than a sentence of words I think he would do well on there.
Have a good one, talk soon.
The Meateor - 19/03/07
It was another normal week at work. We've certainly been busy which is good and had the odd meeting but nothing that was really note worthy. A new restaurant opened opposite us a few months back and we had decided to all head over to it to do our bit in supporting a local business. Although the place never looked busy enough to necessitate us booking a table I thought it was right that I should do so the day before. I thought it would be nice for them to see that they were attracting some business and from a selfish point I hoped it might mean that they would thaw out the 'special' chicken rather than using the scraps.
Thursday came and after work we all headed over. It's advertised as a Nepalese restaurant, and it may well have some of their dishes, but it's basically an Indian. I'm always impressed with any restaurant that has clean tablecloths and proper white cotton napkins. It was clean, friendly and the service was welcoming, helpful but not too eager. I think we'd all had doubts over how good it was but we all couldn't fault it. They did big (600ml) bottles of lager for the others and proper coke from a bottle rather than draft. They even kept the bottle in the fridge for me. The background music was English and the toilets didn't stink.
We were all having a good laugh and ordered a selection of starters to follow the poppodums. They were amazingly well presented with drizzled sauce and strategically placed garnishes. Most of the plates were square or rectangular which is another good sign I think. It's funny I always joke with one of my mates when he recollects going to a fancy restaurant and I always ask "Did it have square plates?". Anyway the starter I had were these large mushrooms rolled in breadcrumbs, stuffed with mince. It doesn't sound that good but trust me it was. I tried some other dishes and they were equally as nice. We went a bit mad on the main courses. I was a little boring in ordering my one as I went for a chicken tikka masala. There is a reason though. a. I really like tikka masala and b. If I always have the same in different establishments then it provides me with a 'control'.
There was a lot of food between us: Saag aloo, bombay potatoes, naan bread, plain rice, basmati rice, the dish which is basically cheese and peas, some spare meat dishes plus everyones individual main course. It was really yummy. One of the greatest moments for me when sitting down to enjoy a curry is tearing off that first piece of warm doughy naan, dunking it into the tikka masala sauce and popping it into my mouth. Believe me when I say that moment delivered. What a great meal it was. Served in nice white porcelain dishes rather than those cheap metal dishes, the sauces weren't oily and all the meat used (chicken, lamb, duck) was really good quality. I certainly didn't come across any gristly bits.
It was a really enjoyable night. The food was excellent, the restaurant exceeded all of our expectations and we all had a good laugh and natter. I do work with some really great people. We are a varied bunch but we all share a similar level of humour and refreshingly there isn't the feuds or political shenanigans that you can find in some places. I ran two of my colleagues to the station to catch a train as I didn't want their night ruined with a troublesome journey home before heading back myself.
Friday was comic relief day and I was going to do all I could to avoid catching any of it on the TV that night. Call me an uncharitable bastard but an evening of people in baths of baked beans, over earnest, over weight comics speaking in hushed tones from a poverty stricken African village or the cast of Eastenders performing a number from Chicago the musical, would just be too much. I reserved a couple of DVD's and got ourselves prepped for some fish 'n' chips. Found myself watching some Ugly Betty as we chowed down on tea. I'd previously dismissed it as being predictable trash but I must have caught an episode about half way through as Betty looked like she had a bit of spirit and backbone. Her boss was laid up hungover with her family decorating the christmas tree and it was genuinely touching seeing his eyes opened to the simple pleasures of family life. In the meantime Betty was getting some attention from this spectacled guy and again it was really sweet. Bitter and cynical as I am, I'm still a sucker for delicately handled blossoming love. Plus of course there is Salma Hayek's truly fantastic cleavage to behold. It's hard to get rid of the image of her hairy armpits in the film Frida, but this goes some way. Anyway this ran to a double bill which was very well received.
Followed this with The Prestige starring Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman. It was a very good film with plenty of intelligence and twists and turns. Brother and I kinda figured out what was going on before the end but I don't know if this is an indication of our intelligence or how the director wanted the audience to be in on the gag before the final reel. It was entertaining and enjoyable.
The second DVD we got was Casino Royale. I had reserved The Guardian, which is the coastguard film starring Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher, but it hadn't come back in so I took Casino instead. Watched it on Saturday afternoon. It was good to see it again. The opening credits with the animated sequence is still quite cool as is the parcor action sequence at the beginning. It's quite ridiculous that a terrorist bomber would be such an expert but it does serve to demonstrate Bond's no nonsense attitude. The bomber pulls out some fancy move to go through a small elevated gap while Bond just smashes through the stud wall. The whole first act is good but seeing it again you could really feel the second act dragging. The initial interplay between him and Vesper works well but the poker game generates little or no tension. You know he's going to fuck up the first big stakes game and in turn win the second big stakes game. Plus the fact that they can get up from the table seemingly whenever further hampers its chance to create real drama.
As we were heading out early-ish that night we had to cut the film short. This was at the point when he was recovering and I wasn't hugely bothered. I would have liked to see it through to the end but the nagging doubts that I'd felt on my first viewing were coming back. He plays a good bond and I'm really looking forward to see what they do next. It was refreshing that they actually killed off the main bond girl for a change yet it still seemed to miss something. Maybe because this film felt like the opening chapter of a story and I'm just desperate to read more.
Headed up to my mates, picking up the two girls en route. Ordered a pizza when we got there. I'd seen the Meateor from Dominos in magazines and was keen to try it out, especially bearing in mind my fondness for meaty pizzas. Encountered difficulties in establishing whether they could supply a delivery pizza to us as they were based in Greenwich. Spoke to three different people, all whose mastery of English seemed to get progressively worse, and must have repeated the address about four or five times. After going on hold for the third time before commencing with a fourth person I told them politely how I couldn't be arsed with explaining it all over again and that I would take my custom elsewhere. As we all debated what we might have in replacement my mobile rang and to his credit the manager had called me to apologise for the errors and being put on hold. If we still wanted to order the pizza he would be happy to take it, offer us a discount and throw in some garlic bread.
His attitude to customer service impressed me immensely so I ordered them. It would have been £52 but the discount brought it down to £36 and they turned up exactly within the timeframe the manager had said. Unfortunately the pizza didn't live up to his hard work. The main base sauce for the Meateor seemed to be BBQ and it was applied like syrup. I'm not a huge fan of bbq sauce at the best of times and all it managed to do was drown out the taste of all the meat on the pizza. Even though each mouthful contained pepperoni, ground beef, sausage, meatball and pork all you could taste was the bbq. We put a fair chunk away but had to resort to dunking it in a sour cream dip to neutralise the over-powering sauce. I must have been at about a million calories so I can't imagine the dip made a great deal further impact. A pointed reminder that come what may, Pizza Hut still makes the best pizza's this side of the ocean.
Cabbed it into town as we thought about experiencing Paddy's day in town. It felt a little subdued. I only saw a few guys with silly green hats on and The Porterhouse had a queue but nothing outrageuous. Grabbed a quick drink at this crappy wine bar in Covent Garden before moving onto a pub that one of the girls knew. It was a bit quiet but we were having a laugh and making our own entertainment so it didn't really matter. At one point whilst ordering some drinks I got chatting to one of the bar maids. She was this pretty American girl who was over doing work experience/college course. She hailed from Maryland which wasn't where they made cookies as she said and probably has to say everyday.
I was keen to chat to her as I find the US fascinating. I asked whether she'd been to Cedar Point, how long she'd been over and told her about our forthcoming trip. She seemed really impressed at the amount we were planning on doing when we hit Orlando. She also loved Disney and was actually heading there to work from August - January. How amazing. She'd also been to Paris and Barcelona. She was only 18 but I liked her energy and 'get up and go' attitude. I was aware of the age gap and didn't want to seem like I was cheesily chatting her up but she was entertaining and I love gassing. Later on she came round to collect glasses, we chatted some more and I introduced her to my brother. I gave her my email address and mentioned my site but not as a 'line' but rather because I found her really sweet and interesting. Knowing somebody whilst we were in Orlando could also be pretty cool, though at 18 I doubt we could go clubbing or anything.
We made a point of saying goodbye when we left and I didn't want to unnerve her or make myself feel like a twat. I said the email wasn't a line but rather a chance to continue chatting. I'm sure my readers are thinking 'Yeah right, you just want to get into her knickers' but I enjoyed talking about America. It would be nice if she got in touch but I'm not burning a candle or anything. Managed to grab a black cab back to my mates and that proved just as much fun as along with other things, my friend and I recreated Charlie Chalk's infamous routine - "I'll have a doughnut, a cream bun and a slice of that cake............(wipe face)............over there!" Finished the night by watching the end of American Psycho with tea and biscuits, a most civilised way to draw the night to a close.
On a friends recommendation watched 'Sweet Home Alabama' on Sunday. I knew it was going to be a chick flick and it was ok with a few laughs here and there. Reese Witherspoon is very pretty to look at and even though I'm straight I'd have to concede that Josh Lucas does have amazingly blue eyes. Interesting lead guy really. His face isn't the traditional handsome type and almost looks a little beat up but the rugged charm and stellar eyes must work I guess. I found the end of the film a little hard to take. As always with these kind of 'jilted at the altar to return to her true love' films it does mean that for two people to be happy someone has to get really hurt. In this instance the one who lost out was a really nice guy (the doctor from Grey's Anatomy I believe), so wasn't even like he deserved it. For me this created a little emotional detachment for the final couple, especially Reese's character. Also saw the F1 season start this year in Australia with Raikkonen winning in the Ferrari. It wasn't an exciting race but Lewis Hamilton did very well coming in third on his very first F1 Grand Prix. With MotoGP and F1 up and running my Sundays should now have a little more structure.
TV that night had the 100 Greatest Stand Up comics, which was won by Billy Connolly. Give me a break. I'm sorry but he just ain't that funny. Dying his beard pink, wearing a stripey black and white suit or driving round New Zealand on a bike maybe but comic genius? Hardly. Some of the acts they counted down were funny. Chris Rocks 'Two types of black people' routine, Bill Hicks on Jesus not wanting to see crosses if he returned to Earth. Disappointing that my favourite stand up, Dave Allen, didn't get a mention. Brilliant comic and master of observational humour. I think seeing him in my formative years had an influence in the direction of my humour, which in turn leads to my Rants section, which you guys may or may not like.
I'm working on maybe adding another gallery and some more photos to the site soon. There's even talk of maybe a new section on Sex (wow!), so watch this space.
To quote the late Mr Allen "Goodnight, thank you, and may your god go with you".
Armageddon, boxing and not enough vigilantism - 12/03/07
This week seemed to be a mix of late afternoon meetings, some that went well and some that didn't. We continue to make more friends at our main clients but one of the latter week ones we didn't have as good an opportunity to shine. A fair chunk of driving and sitting in traffic. Gained a new client, which could bode very well for the future. M and P obviously did the business when they presented to them a few weeks back. I told you they were a potent force.
The soundtrack to Armageddon, ie the classical music rather than the songs, arrived on the Tuesday and has been played solidly in the car since. Although the track listing is all over the place (tracks played on the space station before the launch) it really is a cool soundtrack with a good smattering of delicate, action and rousing pieces. I certainly wouldn't mind dropping the launch track as we approached the gates of Kennedy Space Centre in Sept. Hearing the music made me want to see the film again. I never liked it that much when it came out but that is a noticable trend with the films of Michael Bay. When I first see a film I really get into the story and his films rarely deliver in this department. What he is good at though is filming action sequences and when you return to his movies to view them as a good string of sequences they become far more enjoyable. The launch sequence, re-fueling scene where the station blows up and the scene where they come to land on the asteroid and one of the shuttles gets taken out are particularly good. Bruce's death scene at the end of the film seems to me a great way to go and had I been there I'd have been clamouring for his spot, assuming I didn't have a wife and kids. The death will be quick as it was a hell of an explosion, your sacrifice had a purpose, a killer view to be the last thing your saw and you would be immortalized for ever more back on Earth. There is a real guilty pleasure in watching his films. I'll try to go into his next film, Transformers, hoping for the same.
During the week I only managed to catch the last half of a TV programme I'd been meaning to watch. The Great Global Warming Swindle. It was on Ch4 but naturally didn't get the exposure it deserved. It made for fascinating viewing and wheeled out a host of names who did not believe in the myth that we are causing global warming. Yes we are causing pollution and that isn't in doubt but the hysteria surrounding climate change and the mass of supposed evidence for it was debunked. It talked how sea changes always happen, how they can more be caused by thermal expansion of the seas which can take hundreds of years, how sometimes rising sea levels can be brought about by the land sinking, how the normal values of investigative journalism seem to disappear when global warming is mentioned and scare-mongering paranoia takes over, how many individuals are reliant for jobs and grants on perpetuating this hokum, how scientists names where used to validate the Stern report without their permission, how Greenland was warmer 1,000 years ago than it is today, how the discharge of C02 into the atmosphere by volcanoes dwarfs what we produce, how climates have always changed and will continue to change over the course of the Earth's lifetimes. The most damning evidence contribution came from the co-founder of Greenpeace who claimed that the West telling Africa that it should use the two most expensive and inefficient energy methods (wind and solar) whilst it had cheap fossil fuels, was outrageous. A very good programme, I wish I'd seen more.
I remember when at school (ok that was 20 years ago) that we were taught the dangers of a new ice age, now we are going to be baking hot. The Earth will change, things just do. The opportunism of the government, and opposition parties, to see it as a chance to grab some more tax to pay for their wasteful and inefficient running of the country bugs the shit out of me. It really does. If you attempt to speak out about this global warming con then you are accused of having your head in the sand. It seems the human race, or certain sectors of it, just have to have a threat of some impending doom to be able to function. If if isn't the cold war, nuclear armageddon or global terrorism then it has to be something else to keep the population in fear or at least control.
Headed over to Dagenham to see some boxing on Friday night. A friend had a friend whose brother was fighting and having never been to a boxing match we thought it would be interesting to see what it was like. The event was staging twelve fights I think and we walked in just as the guy we'd come to see stepped into the ring. Knowing of the person in the ring made it quite exciting and he did really well. He'd stepped up a class as this other fighters opponent hadn't turned up and when it started I thought our guy was going to get battered. His opponent was shorter, thicker set and the power of his punches looked overwhelming but full credit to our guy who let the other burn himself out (shades of Rocky III), cut him and then forced him to take a knee twice in the fifth round before the ref stopped it with less than 5 seconds to go. Little did we know that this would be the highlight of the evening.
It was amazing how un-involved the audience were with some of the fights. I almost felt embarrased for the fighters who couldn't even muster a round of applause from the crowd at the end of some of their rounds. It was an interesting crowd that it attracted. Granted it was in a sports centre so I wasn't expecting celebrities, although Amir Khan was there. No as expected we had a selection of flat cap wearing pikeys, young guys who'd made far too much of an effort in their appearance for a boxing contest, the token grey haired thug in a union jack shirt chanting 'oggie, oggie, oggie' backed up by his smaller and could only afford a union jack t-shirt sidekick. There were over-produced, older dolly birds that had obviously gone to find a neanderthal man, blokes with full length padded football jackets making exaggerated use of their mobile phones as if they were important heads of state, there were people who had to keep leaving their chairs to make dramatic dashes to the exits as if a package had just arrived, charming gentleman who had to holler at the ring girls to 'show us your gash' or 'get out your lungs'. The overheard conversational highlight had to be from a bunch of chavs behind us who talked about going down to a friends in Devon who 'lived off the land' and had 17 acres of 'just land' that you shoot animals on and how if you shot it you could eat it! One guy said he would even take down his unwrapped metal detector!
The main event for the night was a European title fight. A Londoner against the champion, who was an Italian. There was an Italian contingent in the audience who were highly vocal in their support for their guy. I was quite surprised at the timidity of the audience when faced with a section of foreigners chanting for their man. You'd think they would have responded in kind with their own chants, but not a murmur. The Londoner tried and although they went at it hammer and tongs for 12 rounds the Italian rightfully retained his crown. The night was entertaining and as I'd never done it before I was glad for the opportunity to see what real boxing was like. The night was rounded off quite nicely with a trip to the big M for a wonderful double 1/4 pounder meal. Man, that it so my favourite burger.
An excellent lay in on Saturday and then up for the MotoGP, which was a pleasant surprise. I knew the new season was due to start soon but not this early. I guess being in Qatar, the countries religion made it happen on a Saturday but it made a welcome change. Rossi had taken pole but Casey Stoner, an excellent rookie from last year, had put his bike on the second spot. He'd moved to Ducati and I always liked his style last year. A real fighter but had a habit of pushing so hard that he ended up crashing. Anyway he blasted off and Rossi kept up with him as he always does. I thought it was going to be another tedious case of Rossi stalking him until the last few laps and then over taking him but Casey kept his cool and his Ducati down the straight was blisteringly quick and joys of joys Rossi had to contend with second. Hayden unfortunately was having trouble getting used to his new bike (the whole grid has gone down to 800cc's) and could only manage a 9th. It bodes well for the season and I'm certainly looking forward to watching more races.
Toyed with the idea of going to the gym, what's new for a Saturday afternoon, but my heart really wasn't in it. Maybe as we get a little closer to the holiday or I feel that summer is more of a real possibility I'll get my arse back into gear. The thing with the faceparty girl (see previous entry) really knocked my self belief that going to the gym is great but it really doesn't change anything. All I wanted to do was sleep some more so I went back to bed for the afternoon. Was heading out on the lash that night so had a long bath, leisurely dress and a few absinthe shots with brother before the cab picked us up to run us out.
Hit a bar to meet a few girls that we know. Two of them really seem to like me in a platonic way, even to the point of knowing me well enough to give me a present of a small packet of Cathedral City cheddar cheese. It was a little warm but I scoffed it down in the bar. They were keen to introduce me to their friends and I went into hi-energy, mr entertainer mode, naturally helped along with the amount of red reefs that I was putting away. It felt nice holding court and keeping people entertained. Ok, my conversation subject matter was pretty banal (baked beans, types of washing liquid/powder etc) but at least it allows everyone an opportunity to speak and it seemed to make many of them laugh. Moved on from here to a local nightclub. The rest of them went in the over 25's part but as I was out with my brother, I accompanied him into the normal part. I didn't mind, I enjoy spending time with him and absence from the others, before I began to annoy them, is never a bad thing.
We grabbed some more drinks and at one point headed onto the dance floor. We were minding our own business when this girl turned round and said "can you not push as one of us is pregnant". She turned back to her mates with a smug look on her face and I couldn't help but lean over and say "I didn't touch you". Christ, if there is one thing that annoys me (well there's quite a few I guess) it's a girl who arrogantly assumes I'm hitting on her. Jesus I'm doing my own thing and trying to have a laugh yet I get treated as if I've grabbed a handful of her voluminous arse. Some of my brothers female work colleagues came over and started chatting to him. These munters shot a look round as if ready to say something else before realising that it was some other girls in close proximity and decided against it.
We hooked back up with the rest but I could feel myself becoming more drunk and managed to miss the opportunity to say goodbye to anyone. Couldn't finish the final bottle of whatever it was I was drinking and the evening air when we left the club seemed to make me even more pissed. Needless to say when I got in I was hungry, not really having eaten all day, and rustled up myself some baked beans, two fried eggs, toast and a glass of milk. Perfect late night stodge to soak up the alcohol and allow easier admission to the deep sleep club.
Unsurprisingly a heavy night was answered with a long lay in. As I say I ain't much of a sleeper during the week. With so many things to do and read etc, sleeping during the week seems a waste but come the weekend and that bed just has the magnets on. Decided to watch Serenity again that afternoon and it is still a really great film. Cool sci fi with a brilliant script and involving story. Hit the cinema to check out Outlaw that night and I thought it was a mess. It's like the film didn't know what it wanted to be. It was about vigilantes, or at least set up the premise of vigilantes giving it back to the yobs but then bottled out. Sean Bean and his crew were a bunch of muppets with little conviction or edge to what they were doing. The film laboured on while the characters kept on deciding whether they should do something worthwhile. One minute they are beaten up in a fight outside a pub, the next holding trained armed police at bay. I was hoping the film was going to show the kind of burberry chav bullies that the director, Nick Love, showcases so well getting some retributive justice but unfortunately not. A good premise pissed up the wall with a dithering plot and script and way too much time wasted trying to look cool with more London aerial shots than a Mayors electoral campaign. Half the wankers in the audience with their popped collars, caps and general lazy comings and going during the film were too stupid to realise that the very anti social thugs that the film was trying to portray were in fact them. You could have wiped out about half the audience and done the world a favour.
Oh and finally I got another out of the blue message from a person who discovered my site through metro.co.uk. They said they loved the rants section because of my sarcasm and also liked my perception on relationships. It really is heart-warming when people take the time to write. Thanks.
Trying to be a good citizen - 05/03/07
Had to get some petrol first thing as we were driving up to our clients for an mid morning meeting. I pulled into Sainsburys with the filler cap on the opposite side of the car. Got out, inserted the pump with no fuss or kinks in the hose to then get a tannoyed annoucement across the forecourt asking whether I could move closer to the pump. Why I don't know there wasn't anything wrong with the flow. Just some complete 'jobs worth' no doubt, ticking off health & safety regulation box 247!
Took one of the clients out to lunch at Nando's, the most popular restuarant in the world. I'm sure that's not an accurate claim but everytime I've walked past one or considered stopping there, the queue has been ridiculous. Even on a Monday lunchtime, around 12.30 - 1 ish there was still a fair chunk of people there. It's priced around pizza hut prices, which for a sit down, knife & fork place isn't bad I guess. Amazing how everyone else's portions always look huge whilst mine looked distinctly normal. Did I get swizzled? Am I a fat bastard with a voracious appetite and eyes bigger than that appetite or do the portions when I'm not eating suffer from the 'grass is always greener' problem. Chatting to the client things didn't look very promising and I think all three of us were left pretty bummed out. Hit the pool later that night, which was good. Something had wound me up during the day and it was good to be able to burn off the extra energy that this frustration had created.
Watched the film Wilderness which was ok. It's about a group of young offenders who get taken to this island for some bonding programme but get picked off by this hunter. It's not bad. Very derivative of the superior Dog Soldiers even starring Sean Pertwee who seems to play a similar role and I'm sure the music is by the same guy who did Dog Soldiers.
I found myself pre-occupied this week. It affected my mood at work and commitment to the gym. Needless to say the distraction was caused by a woman. She didn't do anything wrong but the whole thing got under my skin.
A few weeks back I received a message from a girl on Faceparty. Her profile picture was a blatant tit shot which would normally make me think shallow, exhibitionist tart but she seemed new to the whole internet thing. She'd written to me along with others as she was tracking down some distant relatives of her mum whose maiden name was the same as mine. I took a look through her profile and there were some nuggets and gems of originality that distinguished her from a lot of the crowd following sheep that normally inhabit that site. I responded and we began to enter some dialogue. She came across as intelligent and articulate and the almost daily emails that we shared were fun and exciting. I played it straight with her and didn't try to be anything other than myself.
She responded in kind, seemed to like me, say the right things and I found myself looking forward to her next message. I wasn't getting heavy or racing things forward. Internet time for her was limited so I moved at her pace. I was also conscious that given her 'racy' profile she would be receiving her fair share of "Hi Sexy", "Whats up babe" and "Let's get jiggy" type messages. I treated her like an individual and conversed normally without going down the 'sexy' route. Saying this the messages did become a little more charged as we got to know each other and as we had things in common I directed her to my site. She seemed to like it, though I think the amount of content unnerved her.
She was 25/26, a beautician with blonde hair and blue eyes (never saw a face shot so can't be sure). She was capable of composing a decent message, had a sense of humour, a flirtatious manner, not afraid to joke at herself and was guilty of maybe saying things she wish she hadn't when drunk. She even said she had been a competition worthy gymnast when younger before having to quit due to filling out in the chest area. She sounded like my cup of tea, though maybe my imagination was filling in the blanks, and she called me her action man. The kind of girl that I probably wouldn't have a reason or hope of approaching if out and about but that maybe through this medium I would have a chance. She sounded so good that I even seriously questioned whether she was another wind up, like the one I'd had the previous year.
Then without warning she messaged me at the beginning of the week to say how she'd met a nice guy, who although not as intelligent as me she'd already seen twice. She even signed the message with love and hugs. I confess that the news stung and hurt a little. I wasn't cross. I don't own her and she's naturally free to do what she wants but the manner of telling me seemed insensitive bearing in mind the things we'd discussed. Had I misread what was being said? Did she look at me as a friend and nothing more? I chatted with my brother and he thought I hadn't misread anything.
It's easy to look back with hindsight and say I should have done this or that. Some will say I shouldn't have mentioned my site but who knows what is the right thing to do. I didn't try and rush things with her by asking for her phone number after a week or so and maybe I should have. Perhaps I should have started moving the messages down a sexier, flirtier route quicker. In reality, you can't second guess what someone is and isn't going to like. You might be able to make sweeping generalisations like don't act keen, don't pay compliments but where does that get you? What's the point in the games if you aren't being true to yourself? We started communicating through the net so why not play my ace.
She obviously had taken an interest in me so why not give her the chance to see and read up more about me. The site is me so why not risk her seeing if she liked me. Titanic was one of her favourite films and I'm proud of my review of it. She also liked Italian food, liked America etc so again my Vegas trip report and beloved recipe might make her smile. What got under my skin about being dropped like a wet bag of shit though was that it did bother me. It had knocked me off, caused the needle to bump out of the groove and skid across the surface of the vinyl.
I've grown accustomed to almost regarding women as 'them'. A separate species or group that I don't understand or really expect to interact with. This lumping together of them is almost like my security blanket. I can dismiss them as all the same, a group that are going to cause me heartache or stress. It might sound pathetic, juvenile and bitter but in a way it makes it all easier to accept. It's like how all bouncers and estate agents are grade 'A wankers and arseholes and you don't want to meet a nice one because it would mean that you might have to re-evaluate what you think of them as a whole. You can look at a woman from afar and might think they are nice and cute but in reality they are from another world and there is no room for compatability.
Trouble arrives when a female shows an interest, attempts to prick or even burst the bubble that you are hiding within and you are suddenly forced to re-look at them. All of sudden you are thinking how they are in fact just people, just individuals like me. You begin to think well maybe they are obtainable and not that different after all. Maybe you could get to know one who could be friendly and sexy. You begin to consider whether you could find happiness with them. Maybe they could actually fancy you for just being you. It's kinda scary to have to start thinking that maybe I would have to change what I do. To maybe drop some of my more 'geekier' habits to meet a woman half way.
It's the very notion that although years of cynicism and reason are stacking up against you, you begin to think that men and women can get along and that all the hang ups, fears and plain frustrations with them are simply caused by stubborn stupidity. Then just when you begin to believe, when you've passed the point of dismissive indifference, when you begin to feel the cogs slowly working again, when you notice your heart beating faster when you see a new message has arrived it's taken away.
I'm not trying to express my anger with her. Far from it. Life is about living, grasping what you can, when you can and I hope she finds happiness. What bugs me is the fact that it bugs me, that I feel weak because it knocked me and I allowed it to. That I let myself once again become excited and then in turn eventually disappointed. It's like having a row of cakes behind a glass screen. After long enough of not having them, you convice yourself that they aren't tasty and sweet but rather stale and never as nice as you imagine. Collectively saying that they have all gone off makes it far easier to deal with the fact that you aren't going to have one. Indeed sometimes you can even convince yourself that you wouldn't want one if offered. Trouble is, if someone waves the cake under your nose (let's say its a glistening Eclair crammed full of fresh cream) the thought of enjoying all those different variants of cake come racing back into your mind like the escaping waters of a broken dam.
Ah well, who knows. I could have been hugely disappointed when I eventually saw her face. She could have dressed like a 'new look' chav and had the personality of a goldfish. Alternatively she could have been the girl of my dreams. Maybe my imagination attached more significance to it than ever there really was. I doubt I'll ever know and before too long I'm sure she'll fade from my memory (bar being immortalised in my journal that is!) but it was being fooled into believing that it would turn out any differently than I expected which narked me. Things change and I'm sure I'll treat the next case with a fresh eye but another tick in the negative pile does an' half make the next pinch of salt I'll remember to take even bigger!
Another meeting on Tuesday at the same clients. This was later in the afternoon meaning that as we'd made good time we grabbed something to eat in the nearby Tesco's canteen. M went for pizza, chips and beans which I thought an intriguing combination. I would never consider having beans with pizza and chips, usually looking at both the pizza and chips as equal partners on a plate. Adding the beans relegates the pizza into the role of a pie meaning that you can then consume with the beans (ie on the same fork). I decided to 'be crazy' and give it a go and coupled with the pizza being very fresh it really worked. Good choice M. The meeting went well and was followed by another that had been hastily arranged just as we'd left the office. This also went really well and all three left in far better spirits than we had the previous day.
It was my mums birthday and we had meant to go out for a meal but fearing that our meetings would over run I postponed it for another fay. As it happened I got home normal time and although she didn't want to go out still invited me down for a little nosebag. It was nice to sit down for a meal with Mum and bro and have a good chat. I'm quite open in front of her and there is little if anything that I won't discuss and I'm quite glad about that. To give you an example we managed to get started about how a man's G spot is supposed to be located up his arse and I asked quite matter of factly and before I had realised whether my brother had done his ex up the arse. Mum wasn't fazed at all and this isn't because she's common but I think she's just a lot more open. Besides, having had your 14 year old son run in literally seconds after having had his first wank, I think she's used to me not being worried about embarrasing her. Watched an episode of Strutter whilst down there with my brother, which was funny and good to see at last.
Embarked on one of my late night walkathon's when I left Mum's. It was a good chance to think and try to clear my head, though I wasn't very successful in that. The music was good though. As I walked past my local chippie I noticed that the shutter was about a third up and the front door was ajar. That was odd. I looked through the shutter and there were no lights on, no one working inside and I wondered why the door was open. I considered forgetting it and heading home but I like that chippie and the guys who worked there and the last thing I wanted was it to be 'knocked off'. I decided to take a look round the back. There was nothing suspicious back there, well apart from me when the motion triggered floodlight switched on! I had that dilemma. Do I try to say something and make an idiot of myself or ignore and potentially turn a blind eye to a criminal act. There weren't any signs of forced entry but what was to stop others getting in if it had been left open in error. Sat at the bus stop opposite for about 10 minutes as the track playing on my nano was wicked and I wanted to see if anyone came out or went in. They didn't and I was conscious that my hanging around was beginning to make me look like a criminal.
With the shutter down about two thirds I couldn't really just breeze in. I did bend down and muster a hello but I didn't want to do it too loudly in case I woke anyone up. It was about 1.00am ish. Decided that I would call the shop phone number, which was on the signage, thinking that if I woke the owner then at least he would know. The phone rang and was then picked up by a sleepy voice. I told him that I was ringing as a concerned citizen and did he know that the front door was open and the shutter up on his shop. I then saw this figure within the shop who must have been lying down behind the counter. His english wasn't very good and I repeated to him that the door was open and the shutter was up. He muttered a thanks and pressed a button to lower the shutter to the bottom. Well at least I did my good citizen bit.
I should have hit the gym on Wednesday but I really couldn't be arsed. Instead I finished the book about Internet Dating. The author Sean Thomas has an excellent way with his words and his overall conclusions were that of a thumbs up for it. Especially as he met his future wife through it. He talked about the early dates with his would-be wife that struck a chord. He commented how he noticed on the third date that she was wearing a low cut top and had a 'lovely' cleavage. A. It struck a chord for reminding me, or at least highlighting, those pleasures of early dating but also B. how a woman will reward a potential suitor with the revealing of more flesh as the dates progress. I kinda like the notion of that. In a world where everyone rushes things, the idea that a woman would consciously open up and dress a little sexier over the course of a number of dates is quite cool. Granted some women might have done it to me but I'm either incapable of noticing it or if I did, actual believe that it had been deliberate on the part of the women. His writing really conveyed that excitement and heart tremble of looking forward to seeing someone and his recollections made me wistful for some warm summer evening dates.
The remainder of the week was pretty busy at work which is always good. P mentioned the 'chip' word on Friday and before we knew it we seemed to all have agreed that after a reasonably stressful week we all deserved fish'n'chips. It was excellent as usual and I felt bloated afterwards as usual. We also thought we would try a deep fried Mars bar as they offered them in the chippie. It sounds disgusting, I confess, and it didn't look a great deal better but we cut it into chunks and gave it go. It's funny but if it had been created by Heston Blumenthal I'm sure people would rave about it but coming from a chippie it's easy to dismiss. Ok, it wasn't the most incredible thing I've eaten but we all agreed that it tasted surprisingly good. It wasn't fatty and didn't taste deep fried. It was certainly chocolate but didn't taste like a Mars bar and had a chewier texture, almost like a Toffee Crisp. At least I've tried one.
I got a really nice email from a chap from Belfast in the afternoon. He'd somehow stumbled across my site and told me how much he'd been "entertained and enlightened" by it. I confess that those kind of messages, just out of the blue really mean a lot to me. All I hope is that people just find it and things on there make them smile. Bearing in mind his other thoughts, and the views of the one decent review I had, I think my site is certainly more aimed at guys. Maybe the women find it fascinating to read but don't make the connection of quite seeing where it is I'm coming from. Well that's my take on it.
I've just got to say that I'm writing this whilst listening to a truly awesome live trance mix by John O'Callaghan on www.etn.com
We also took a look at the latest film with Sean Bean and Danny Dyer. It's called Outlaw and has Sean playing a para who decides to take matters into his own hand to deal with yob/gang culture. It doesn't look bad, especially with him being fed info from Bob Hoskin's policeman. Trouble with these vigilante style films is that they always start with a good idea and motive, and I've certainly nothing against seeing violent shits getting their just desserts, but then descend where the vigilante begins to enjoy the violence and power to end up becoming a yob themselves.
However bad it might be I'm sure it won't be as poor as The Sentinel starring Michael Douglas. When the film was first advertised I thought it looked like a blatant '24' style film, especially as it also starred Kiefer Sutherland but I like Douglas so thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt. Christ it was poor. It starts off painting this picture of Douglas being an honourable, hard working member of the secret service, who once took a bullet for Ronald Reagan, yet within five minutes he was banging the first lady. All this with another secret service guy who was completely oblivious to what he was doing! I'm not being a prude but it certainly didn't make me warm to any of the characters, no one really seemed to think he was doing anything wrong (except maybe cheating on the president and comprimising his secret service role). They didn't even make the President out to be an arsehole so you could understand her doing it. Lame, tedious, predictable tosh.
Saturday was the normal chill out and the chance to put some hours back into the sleep bank. I seem to manage during the week with about 4-5 hours sleep, not usually hitting the sack until around 2.00 ish but this means I need to catch it up at some point and that point is normally Saturday morning. Got up early to bung in some washing but then it was straight back to the sack. Knowing that the Sunday was going to be an eat-fest made do with little to eat that day and finished the remaining two films of the Back to the Future trilogy. The third is the best out of 2 and 3 particularly with regards to the relationship between the Doc and Clara. The two actors are great bouncing off each other and it's deftly handled.
Sunday and brother and I were round P's for a Lost catch-up. As with the last time brother and I knew we'd be eating well and it was my turn to cook the main meal. No prizes for you guessing what I 'knocked up'. The lost episodes were good though did feel a little 'fillery' compared to the first six that we had seen. P started playing Halo 2 and we realised was good enough to move up a skill level to the Normal rating. Considering she's read the books I'm looking forward to hearing how she'll find the more involving storyline of the second one, particularly with the twists and clever new touches. It felt good to be able to prepare the dinner whilst brother and P played through the first few levels (brother was more of a technical advisor) and then be able to call them into the kitchen.
Top Gear was excellent that night. Although the last in the current run, it only ran for six episodes, it was another cracker where the three guys had to create their own stretch limos, put them through challenges and then drive them round London. Brilliant. I look forward to it's return in the summer. After the fourth episode of Lost which was centred around Hurley and although heartwarming, ultimately pointless, we flicked through to stumble across UFC 68 on Bravo. Brother has been watching the Ultimate Fighter series, which has helped increase his knowledge, and Randy 'the natural' Couture had come out of retirement for a shot at the heavyweight title. We hadn't been aware that it was on but as the fight was just about to start we checked it out. Randy won and was very good but his first punch was an absolute belter. The guy he was fighting was 13 years younger, weighed 40lbs more and had a 10' longer reach yet as soon as the bell went Randy came out, gave him a kick to the leg and then seemed to throw all his weight and strength into this haymaker of a punch that was poetry in motion and exploded flush on the side of the champions face. It literally caused this guy to almost hop back before stumbling to his knees and into the fence. Randy pounced but the champ managed to roll on top of him and effectively lay on him for the remainder of the round to recover his strength.
Randy won all five rounds clearly on points and was a worthy winner. I'm not a huge UFC aficionado and my brother knows more but I've heard of the big names and it was good to be able to see it on the night it actually happened. A busier week at work next week and I must write some emails to those I've shamefully been neglecting, apologies to you if you are reading this. Have a good week.
Tripping on Benylin - 26/02/07
Seemed to spend most of the week quaffing down orange juice, multi vitamins, specific vitamin c tables, Benylin and Covonia cough mixture and an assortment of cold and flu capsules. A meaty, chesty cough decided to be my companion as did it's occasioanl friend, the headache and it's more permanent neighbour, the runny nose. I don't know if it's as I get older or another symptom of this particular virus but the runniness in one's nose had a habit of drying into what felt like almost sharp crystals, that at times were eye wateringly painful.
Couple this illness with eating something that might have been a little dodgy and caused three toilet trips in the space of five hours one evening and it was all I could do to remain looking plain great instead of the usual out of this world. Desperate to get to sleep one night I had an 'Anna Nicole Smith style' cocktail of drink and drugs (cough mixture, 7% alcohol, two capsules and a whole glass of Baileys). Hardly rock and roll I know but for a school night it managed to do the trick.
Some slight anxiety in the office as a few of our contacts at our main clients are being made redundant which could impact heavily on ourselves. We do a lot of work for the company and as long as we aren't overlooked we should be ok though we will need to up our profile. It's presents possible problems and things could be rocky but I couldn't ask to be under better leadership. Our dog tags arrived at the beginning of the week and look ok. Naturally they aren't on the finest, jewellery like metal but they fulfil the role. The plain coloured silencers (rubber rings going round the outside) look a little flat but the red, white and blue ones, which hint at the US and the UK look pretty cool. Brother put two tags together to add a bit more weight, which made a real difference and I hadn't considered doing and I think is what we will probably do. I also cribbed a ball chain from previous tags that we'd done for our weekender tours and these look really good. If I can order another set of just the metal tags and some more ball chain from a hardware store I think the 'holiday specific tag' box will have been ticked.
Talking of Orlando the Disney DVD arrived in the post. We both sat down to watch and were distinctly under-whelmed. It was better produced than the others that we had seen but was over schmaltzy because of it. I know Disney appeals to a younger audience but the video was laced with an overly large dollop of saccharine that was hard to swallow. It was all very PC with even at one point people in wheelchairs hand-gliding as part of fulfilling their dreams. I'm not saying I begrudge a disabled person having just as much fun as me but it felt a little over-blown. It wasn't a huge surprise I guess but I'm confident that when I presented with the chance to throw my arms round Mickey or Eeyore I'll revert to a big kid.
After a long and reasonably stressful week at work we decided for Friday lunch to have a 'taste off' now that McDonalds have decided to have a go at serving crispy chicken fillets. Took everyone's order and hit both McDonalds and KFC. There was a lot of food for the six of us and I think the combined bill came to nearly £60. I went for a double quarter pounder with cheese meal, which I believe is the first McD I've had this year. Christ it was good. That double quarter is just so much yummy meat. By the time we got to the office the chips weren't as good etc and maybe the burger could have been a little hotter but really it didn't matter because the burger hit the spot. It probably sounds crap that a man of my age gets excited about McDonalds but life can be pretty boring if you only allow yourself to get excited by the big things.
As for the taste taste between McD's and crispy strips from KFC everyone else plumbed for KFC. I felt they were a little more peppery whereas the McDonald ones have a thicker, more breadcrumby coating. Maybe the KFC's ones might have edged it but with McD's now serving quality chicken, there is even more reason to go there for a treat. As only we can, we all filled our boots and the afternoon was certainly a more relaxed affair as we all digested our excessive eating. I was still so full come dinner time that I didn't even join my brother in fish'n'chips.
Although I was slowly getting better, the cough when it came was still a hell of a monster that required a full bend over, deep, rasping and sometimes productive cough. With this in mind I felt it best not to visit the gym / pool. Played a little Gears of War which as I'm on the hardest setting and nearing the end is becoming a little tough and had a very long and very hot bubble bath in an attempt to sweat this damn thing out. Attempted to make some tuna pasta that night for brother and step dad. Whether my range only extends to meat based pasta or cooking for three is too much, I don't know but it was very un-exciting. Sunday was equally taxing. Maybe I should be doing something as everyone else always seems to be doing, but what? Saving some cash is the order of the day and staying in really helps that at the moment. The less times that I have to open my wallet and use petrol during these early weekends the better.
Naturally if I had somewhere to go or something to do, I'd do it but without it, I'm happy to just amble around. I've kinda learned to be able to keep myself entertained and thus am pretty ok with doing it. Reading a book, listening to some music, a bit of writing or playing my Xbox, I can always keep myself occupied. Top Gear was entertaining, particularly as it had a rather fetching Lamborghini Murcielago on it, though it still isn't in the same heady league as a Gallardo. Watched the first Back to the Future film as brother had picked up the trilogy box set for the ridiculously cheap, and franly insulting bearing in mind how good they are, price of £9.99. It was funny seeing the normal version and realising how many more "shit's" and "bastards" there are in the script when they aren't being removed by the TV censors. Though there are many, surely the top line from the film has to be when Doc Brown says "when this baby hits 88mph, you're gonna see some serious shit".
Had another walk that night after wandering down with my bro. Is this becoming a trait of a sad lonely old fart or rather someone who likes the simple pleasures of empty streets, warm clothing and some decent tunes on the ipod. It's funny walking past all these houses that are closed up for the night with the occupants tucked up in bed. It feels like everyone is nicely sorted in their semi-detached homes with their two cars and 2.4 children and I can't help but feel isolated and cut off from that normal world. Although I might feel a tinge of melancholy that I'm not part of that settled world, I also feel sometimes strangely liberated that I'm free to observe it. Almost like the map of people's need to settle down, get roots, accumulate possesions etc is clearly laid out for me to see and understand. It seems out of reach because I haven't got a lot of it, yet also amazingly and painfully predictable. Are what I see when I head out, the things that one needs to acquire to be able to call themselves a success. Will gaining this provide piece of mind and a feeling that I'm now worthy or properly part of society. Is that what makes us and in turn, are you nothing without it. As you can see a little Armin in the headphones can really let your mind wander!
I must add as well that even after getting in I still couldn't get to sleep so decided to watch a little telly. The worlds strongest man was on and for the last couple of years Mariusz Pudzianowski has dominated the event, practically winning every event and making it as boring as hell. I came into the programme with three events down and MP steaming ahead, yet this big American fireman, Phil Pfister, won the fourth event and then started to win every event after that. After MP's domination over the last few years, seeing someone 'take it to him' was brilliant. Some of the weights were astonishing, including one event where they had to strap a 996 pound car to their shoulders and walk as far as they could. It came down to the very last event, which was the Atlas stones, and they both faced off against each other. They both set off at a pace, matching each other but Pfister beat him to the drop on the last 353 pound stone meaning he won the event and took the championship. It might have been 2 am in the morning but I couldn't help jumping up with a 'nice one' Phil. Everyone loves an underdog victory.
Take care.
Give it up for the humble chip - 19/02/07
Monday was an easy start back into the week and not a great deal happened. I didn't get to the swimming pool as I was going through the final process of sorting the holiday details. P bought me an old Halo cardboard cut-out from E-bay which went on the back of the wardrobes directly in front of my desk. It's quite cool to have the Masterchief directly above my PC, especially as we enter the year of Halo 3. My brother managed to book his holiday off from work on Tuesday. He works at a department store in Bluewater and rather unfairly had to take four of the days off as unpaid leave. It's pretty shitty that a large organisation can be so poorly organised that even with six months notice and a full holiday allocation, you have to take some of it as unpaid leave to allow them to fund some cover. Following hot on the heels of a frustrating review where his hard work and efforts over the last six months had no bearing, I think it served as another nail in the coffin for his time there. He wasn't going to let it stop the holiday though and told me to go ahead and book it.
Wednesday (Valentine's Day) arrived and needless to say I wasn't swamped with cards. Heading out to my car I was reminded of the previous years event. Then I'd come out to discover a card tucked under my windscreen wiper. I opened it to see a typed message sellotaped into the card. Initially it was nice to know someone fancied me but as I drove to work the doubts crept in. I don't feel that my looks are my strong point but rather that my personality is. How therefore could someone be attracted to me purely from how I looked.
Whats more if they were a brand new person to me then why would they type it? If I didn't know them from Adam, how would I recognise their hand-writing? These kind of things don't happen to me so my level of cynicism was high. Work colleagues thought I was being a miserable bastard and somebody was just being nice but something wasn't right and my gut was telling me not to get carried away.
I texted the number that had been put in the card that night and started some dialogue with her(?). We'd exchanged a few texts and then she claimed she had to go to bed and that we would talk another time. This seemed strange. Here is someone who has apparently fancied me from afar for ages yet when they get the big chance to communicate with me suddenly goes cold and plays hard to get. Over the next few days we exchanged some more texts and she described her physical self. It seemed amazingly close to what it is I look for in a girl. She worked up town, had 38DD tits and had seen me in the village a couple of times. Apparently she'd smiled but I'd not responded.
The alarm bells began to ring even more. I admit to being a sad fuck and am usually aware of a large breasted girl anywhere within a four mile radius of me, let alone someone close enough to be smiling at me. I tried to call her to allay my fears yet her phone always seemed to be switched off, even minutes after sending a text, and my suspicions that I was being cruelly played gained momentum. Her email address was staceythebaffler (should have realised from this) and I her hot/cold confusing actions were not, I believed, those of someone who been secretly liking me for some time.
I brought things to a head with a questioning email about a day or two later and she responded with one that switched tone of voice about three or four times. One minute soft, the next minute aggressive. Although having previously boasted of wearing low cut tops and short pencil skirts she gave the excuse for not having taken my calls that she was very nervous on the phone and stuttered. Were it genuine, I would have sympathised for I used to stammer when younger, though I wouldn't have used this as an excuse to not respond to voice messages. This might make me sound far too controlling. I'm not and I enjoy that frisson of excitement but you have to remember that if this is real, this girl contacted me. I requested a picture, which was ignored, and in the end called her bluff and suggested we meet up as I was tired of being led a merry dance. Needless to say she declined, saying I was being immature and should grow up.
This episode left me a little bitter as one might expect. My gut had told me that good looking honeys don't approach me out of the blue and my cynicism had been proved right. If something is too good to be true, it invariably is and this episode simply re-inforced that notion. To this day I don't know who it was who did it but if they still read my site then I hope they realise what a nasty, cruel piece of shit I think they are. Thankfully there was nothing waiting for me on my windscreen that morning.
On a better light I managed to book the Orlando holiday that day. 17 nights in the Lake Buena Vista area, 17 days car hire with insurance (upgraded from an economy to a compact car), flights with BA and travel insurance for us both. It came to a grand total of £1,643.00 (£821.50 each), which isn't bad at all and by far the most competitive price I could find. It felt funny booking that length of time off work. The last proper holiday I had was way back in 1999, when I went to Canada on my own to hook up with my cousin. Granted I've been away to Las Vegas and Barcelona but they were with my work so I guess we were all off together. Being on holiday while everyone is still working normally is quite a rare concept for me and I concede that doing it every eight years is not brilliant. But at least it proves how important a holiday it will be and maybe encourage me to spend a little more money when I remind myself what a big holiday it is. It took a few days to sink, and even now hasn't really done so, but I continued to try and get loads of info down whilst still in sponge mode so I could then supposedly 'shelve it'. That's not likely though is it and I'm sure I'll be boring you about it for the next six months.
I should have hit the gym on Wednesday night but became pre-occupied with ordering and arranging the dog tags that I referred to last week. Found a couple of places on the web and after deciding what to have inscribed on them ordered them from a site in the Netherlands using P's paypal account. Needless to say it was her 'just do it' attitude that encouraged me to order them at such an early stage.
Had a meeting with our major clients on Friday. The guy we were meeting had confessed to buying a couple of PS3's, which naturally horrified me, so after the meeting, and as I get on reasonably well with him, I gave him an Official Xbox360 magazine that I'd bought for him. I told him I was worried about him turning to the dark side and he seemed genuinely made up with it. It gave us a chance to 'geek out' with talk of computers (he had a Commodore when younger, whilst I had a Spectrum - oh the debate!) and Star Wars and it's never a bad thing to try to cement client relations a little bit more.
It was apparently national Chip week and because of this we all decided in the office at the beginning of the week to celebrate it in the only correct way. Fish 'n' chips on Friday. Many of us, including myself, had been looking forward to it and once we'd got back to the office after our meeting we sat down to our collective feast. I'd even bought one of those cheesy baguette things (where they've used a little cheese in the cooking process) from Tesco's to appreciate the chips in the splendour of a chip butty. They tasted great, particularly with some mushy peas to lighten the palette and we raised a chip to honour their special week. Discovered later that afternoon the website of Paul Kaye's new character 'Strutter'. He plays this foul mouthed, violent 70's mafia thug and I've got to say it's hilarious. Played a few of the videos from his site which certainly had the male contingent of the office laughing out loud.
Went out that night with two of the girls that we'd met a few weeks back, the one where one of the girls had 'grinded me' and called me gay. My mate had arranged it and we met them in a hotel bar. I've got to say that it was a great choice for a start off point. Sophisticated, no smoke and the ability to talk without being drowned out by the sound of music. From here we moved onto a Cafe Rouge where the food was good and the conversation entertaining. We moved onto a bar/club which was ok but expensive, £18 for 4 drinks! The club contained more than it's fair share of scarf wearing pretentious twats but was playing Pulp Fiction on the screens and did drop a couple of cool tunes towards the end which got me boogie-ing. Dropped everyone off and by the time I hit the sack it must have been about 3.00 ish. It was nice to go out with the girls and I was told by them what fun I was to go out with, which is always nice and re-assuring to hear. They were entertaining and good company but I wasn't looking for anything more, and neither were they to be honest, well at least not from me that is.
Paid for the late night with a killer lie in. Did pack the bag to go to the gym but after stopping in at my brother's somehow managed to end up at Sainsburys contemplating Spag Bol for dinner! I had been naughty all week in zero pool/gym attendance but the ultimate goal is September so the odd week off is bearable. Watched an entertaining film that night on TV called Roger Dodger. It's another small independent film (cue chin rubbing at this point) but I remembered seeing it as a trailer a good while back and thought I'd check it out. It's all about this 16 year guy going to meet his uncle, who's a bit of a 'player' with the ladies. The script was razor sharp and very insightful both in the art of dating, the foolishness of men and the predictability of women. From a slowish start it grew into a really good film and one that I was pleased I managed to catch.
Began to feel on Sunday the first inclinations that some kind of illness might be coming. Head felt a little fuggy and I began to develop a cough, the kind that intensifies the headache when you cough. Tried to take it easy, which isn't hard for a Sunday, and mooched around the house. Watched Bubba Ho-tep again and as the final delicate notes of the piano played as the credits began to roll I muttered 'Perfect', a sentiment echoed by my brother. Walked my brother home that night. There was nothing wrong with him or the car but I fancied some fresh air and a chance to stretch the legs. Waving goodbye to him I popped in my headphones and listened to my melancholy playlist. It was good to just have a wander. It was quite late and there was virtually no one out on the streets. It wasn't that cold, felt very still and combined with the music gave me a good chance to mull a few things over.
Re-fining the search - 12/02/07
The week was pretty quiet all in all and hence although I had work to do, I wasn't manic all day and thus had the chance to conduct some serious Orlando research. My travel guide arrived and I started to hammer through that as well. It was pretty daunting trying to take it all on board but slowly I got to the point where my head was crammed full of Orlando knowledge with new hotels considered and then discarded, attractions mulled over and locations investigated.
I got prices from Expedia, Virgin, BA and Travelcity but BA's price for staying at the Comfort Inn Lake Buena Vista, flights, car hire with insurance and travel insurance was amazingly competitive and the woman at the centre was really helpful. They are the definite front runner for who I am going to book with. I also looked at attraction ticket prices, which again was confusing. I think I took on so much that come Wednesday night I got a headache (as I'm sure you are!) and had to stop researching. I left the books and everything and just watched some telly. I also that day heard on streaming soundtracks a track called Nara by E S Posthumous. Cracking piece of music that is the theme to Cold Case (not that I've ever seen that) and is used in loads of trailers. The kind of trailers that talk about 'going further/deeper/faster than he imagined/trained for to save his country/loved one/pet hamster'.
Hit the pool again on Thursday night, as I had on Monday. I saw again the woman I'd seen a few Saturdays ago and she was still pleasing to the eye. The training pool was deserted from about 8.30 so I headed into there and had a try at swimming with closed fists. It was knackering as you didn't have the same level of propulsion that you do with open hands and hence had to work faster. It forced you to increase your kicking and look at your posture through the water. It also did the job of burning more calories and meant that when I went back to open hand I practically flew through the water for the first couple of lengths.
By Friday I'd typed up an Orlando list of places to go, prices, dates etc so I could go through it with my brother to apply the final fine tuning and book it at the beginning of the next week. The DVD's of both Universal and the Busch-Anhauser parks turned up so over some chicken pasta we whipped ourselves into a further frenzy. This was followed by the film Right at your Door. It was a smaller ,more independant film that I'd wanted to see when it came out at the pictures but never got a chance to. The basic premise is about a couple of 'dirty' bombs going off in Los Angeles. It isn't filmed Bruckheimer style and thus you don't see the bombs going off in slow mo or anything. What it is though is a more up close and in your face approach, primarily concentrating on a married couple. She is caught in the blast and hence potentially contaminated, he has followed radio instructions to air seal the house to prevent the airbourne virus/infection getting inside the house. The dynamic and drive of the story comes when she returns home and the dilemma of him letting her in etc. It's very powerful stuff, extremely well handled and genuinely thought provoking.
Up early-ish for a change on Saturday to head to Bluewater to meet up with an old work friend. We grabbed a tea and a bite to eat in the M&S canteen and gassed for over three hours. It was really nice to hook up with her again and good to see that just as when we worked together, we weren't short of things to talk about. Headed back to get my hair cut and discuss Orlando with my hairdresser. They went there about three years ago and as expected added to my enthusiasm and provided the final answer as to whether to stay in Lake Buena Vista or International Drive. Hit the gym after this for a really punishing session. I seem to have done more swimming recently and thus getting back on the treadmill and weight machines was a little tough. Tried another of Lloyd Grossman's curry sauces (the Balti one) that night and christ it was hot and spicy. Even half a carton on single cream couldn't mild it down and although edible it isn't one that will be sitting at the top of my list to buy.
Got another DVD for the night which was World Trade Centre. I hadn't been expecting great things but I did want a film that would remind me of the horror and impact of 9/11. It was ok but centred too much on the two guys plight trapped under the rubble, rather than the towers falling down. That might sound a little ghoulish of me but I want to see a film that tries to shock me like the event did and resonates afterwards, almost like the last five minutes of Flight 93 did. Despite being directed by Oliver Stone this film became very tedious, with random fireballs and other dangerous things happening to the trapped individuals every time the director felt the audience might be getting bored. Unfortunately it was too late for my brother and I and we fast forwarded it to the end to avoid the ham fisted sentimentality.
Sunday was the usual really. A little Xbox action and then grabbed a pizza for tea before watching a very entertaining Top Gear. The three guys had to buy a car each for under $1000 and then drive it from Miami to New Orleans. They had some real fun on the way and it was great to watch. The challenges were good including a particularly hair raising one involving painting potentially offensive slogans on their cars to see the reaction. They pulled into a petrol station where the owner took offense, called in the boys, who then began to stone the camera crew and presenters. Cracking TV and probably some of the best telly I've seen for a good few weeks.
Hopefully by this time next week I'll have booked Orlando 2007, I can compile a final list of things to do while it's all still fresh in my mind and then maybe put it all aside so I don't drive myself insane for a few months. I also want to source some unique dog tags that we can create to wear whilst we are away on our trip of a lifetime. Finally I could do with getting a part-time job to help pay for it so I can continue saving for other things. Take care and talk soon.
Surfin' the sunshine state - 05/02/2007
Well, we made it through January. Always a tough month this. It's normally cold, you are normally strapped for cash and because everyone else is it can be tough socially. It wasn't too bad this time round but it's always nice to get the first one under your belt isn't it. After my adventures with biscuit finding last week a friend told me that the BP garage round the corner from where I worked stocked the Fox's classic biscuits. Typical. I expected them to be way out of date, as most food is within these places, but apparently not. Oh well at least I know where to get them from.
My brother and I last year had discussed that we would try and get away together this year and after narrowing it down to Vegas and Orlando, went for Orlando. It's got all the rides and attractions we love plus the nightlife if you seek it out, which we would. As we've been quite quiet in the office I used the time to have a look round the web and re-acquaint myself with what was new there. I've always had a fairly good knowledge of what's there as I've been fascinated with it for years. I used to read travel books about it when I had my bookstore Saturday job. I ordered 'The Brits travel guide to Orlando' from Amazon and signed up to receive the free Disney and Universal DVD's.
Hit the swimming pool for a later session of 9-10 that night. Went I got home I realised I had some eggs that were on their best before date plus some single cream and some grated cheese. Why throw away the eggs I thought and feeling very cavalier thought I'd rustle up myself a nice Omelette. I was concerned that previous omelette attempts always seemed to come out like scrambled egg, while the scrambled egg attempts were more like omelette's. I heated up some beans while I whisked up four eggs, the remainder of the single cream and some grated cheese. A dash of Worcester sauce to add that 'je ne sais qua' (my french is crap so sorry if I just swore) and it should have been memorable. In reality it was a scrambled egg / omelette hybrid that didn't belong in either camp and looked visually unappealing when scooped onto the plate. Hidden under a further sprinkling of grated cheese it tasted ok, though it wasn't the epitome of culinary flair that I'd hoped for.
Saw mystery girl for the first time this year on the way into work. She still looked as elegant and attractive as always though like a flawed diamond she always has a little something wrong. On this occasion although wearing a nice pair of high heeled shoes she'd forgotten to remove the label from the sole. The week pretty much seemed to continue as before. I'd find myself narrowing the accommodation search down to where it is now, which is effectively two hotels. One in the Lake Buena Vista area and the other on International Drive. At the same I found myself pushing up the amount of time we would stay in Orlando. It's now up to 16 nights.
There are just so many things we want to do there. The four parks of Disneyworld plus the two water parks, the two Universal parks, Discovery Cove, SeaWorld, Busch Gardens and Kennedy Space Centre. We also want the evening entertainment of a few shows; Dolly Parton's Dixie stampede, Medieval Knights and Disney's own Hoop de do Revue along with Pleasure Island and Citywalk with it's nightclubs. Food wise there are just so many places that I want to eat in. They've got the largest McDonalds there which does pizzas (not had a McDonalds pizza for years), Denny's, Steak 'n' Shake and even a Bubba Gump restaurant. As you know Forrest Gump is one of my favourite films and this is all themed from the film. You can even buy the very same red Bubba Gump baseball cap that he wears in the film. I'm already beginning to pack my bag in my mind and think of all the things I need to take. I also envisage looking as buff as a Spartan, ok well maybe just a little leaner. I think I need a few more days researching but am confident that it will happen. Then to the delight of one reader who said I never stopped going on about winning the lottery, I can go on about Florida for the next six months instead!
Managed to develop a headache on Wednesday afternoon as well as then feeling a little faint which could only be remedied with food and thus I missed out on the gym. This was a shame as I fancied seeing the girl from the previous week again if I could. Made up for this by nailing out another hours session on the Thursday night at the swimming pool. I've been currently reading 'Millions of women are waiting to meet you'. It's about one guys exploits and encounters when trying his hand at internet dating. It's an enjoyable read and his candid talk of women, masturbation, loneliness etc have been refreshing and reminded me of the benefits in being even more open on my site. Hence my more studious readers need to take note that more racy topics may be appearing soon.
Decided to head out on Friday night with my brother as he'd had a fair few days off and we'd been talking about it for ages. Raced home for a quick bath, iron, shot of Absinthe and onto the bus into my local town. We started at a bar which seemed quite empty and full of very young people. I'm not saying that in a 'I felt old' manner, just that there were a lot of youngsters in there. We headed down the main strip and everywhere seemed a lot quieter than one would have expected for the Friday after payday. At one point we considered calling it a night and getting the bus home but decided to persevere. A few more drinks and talk naturally turned to Orlando. We headed to a Wetherspoons where the drink was really cheap and after a few more shots and doubles our bravado at how much fun and how many American women we would meet increased exponentially.
We ended up at the club we went to on New Years Eve to grab a final few drinks and see if there were any pretty girls out. The girl from the gym, who'd impressed me with her running, was there and I surprised myself by embarking on a brief conversation with her when my brother went to get some drinks. She told me she was running in the London Marathon and hence the punishing regime. We chatted a little bit more during which I was handed my drink plus a shot glass full of black aftershock. I attempted to sip a little to retain a modicum of cool, only managing to spill some over my lips and fingers. I don't think she noticed what a bumbling fool I was being but by then the conversation was trailing off and she was clearly bored. No worries. At least I found the courage to talk to her, albeit alcohol inspired, and was just happy to be able to knock back my shot and clean my sticky fingers. Brother and I danced for a little bit before deciding to do the off and tab it home, about 2.5 miles, with a mixture of tipsy running and fast paced walking.
Up and out on Saturday with a little tingle of a hangover but not much. Over to P's with some road rage en-route at a wanker who completely cut us up at a junction. If he'd put his hand up to apologise I would have chilled but giving us two fingers resulted in the longest session of holding my horn down whilst flipping the bird that I've done in the car. Man, I was pissed off and after following him through the Blackwall tunnel I took pleasure in blocking him in when he got caught behind a slower moving car and I was in the fast lane. P had earlier been to see a few examples of the dogs she is getting and we were keen to hear her thoughts over a cup of tea and a bacon and egg sarnie. We then moved on to test drive a Focus ST, which I'd said I thought might be suitable as she was looking at downsizing to a slightly more practical car but something still with a little poke.
She'd booked a 4.00pm test drive and the guy kept us waiting for nearly half an hour. It did give us a chance to look around the one in the showroom and I understand that it's difficult if you've already got customers but no one else tried to help. When we eventually sat down P vented that she was downsizing from a better car, wasn't really interested in cup holders and this was only a means to an end. There was a cuttable atmosphere between P and the salesman. He was the typical over-produced hair, bejewelled, been on a sun bed too long car salesman and P was a little cheesed off at his patronising attitude. He went to get the keys and I said to P 'Jesus, you are being a little tough aren't you'. She listened, which I confess my male friends wouldn't do, and agreed that maybe she had been. From having played the no-nonsense moody bitch, when we all got in the car she apologised for appearing to 'diss' his product. What a blinding move. The guy opened up and dispensed with the pushy sales, everyone relaxed and it allowed us to enjoy the test drive.
The car performed nicely and although P wasn't massively excited, did admit that it would be practical. We headed back to the showroom and I thought would say thank you very much. Instead we sat down and P chatted prices. I'd got her a price from a guy on the internet which was about two and a half grand off the normal price. Dealers normally never even bother trying to match an internet price, they certainly didn't on my car, but they were prepared to match it for P. They tried to make her pay extra for the metallic paint but she stuck to her friendly but unconcerned if she got it attitude and they chucked it in. She even got them to reduce their offer of GAP insurance down from £500 to £200. I was stunned at her go get it attitude and impressive negotiation skills. I confess to also being excited that she was getting what is currently one of my favourite cars. I think even she was a little surprised at how quickly it had been done but effectively it heralded the real start of her campaign to get a dog. Bravo to her.
Met up with M later on to catch a film at the Greenwich Odeon. We saw Blood Diamond which I enjoyed. It was a well made film as one expects from Edward Zwick, the director of Glory and The Last Samurai, and Leonardo Di Caprio was excellent. I really rate him as an actor. I think he has great screen presence and is very good at what he does though maybe this is sometimes overlooked because of his good looks. He plays a Rhodesian with a South African accent which he maintains even when shouting, a feat of acting that even Tom Hanks can't pull off in Forrest Gump. I guess where the film didn't make a lasting connection was it's setting of Africa. Without sounding harsh I've been bombarded with so many images of the suffering and cruelty in Africa since what, the age of 14 ish that I just can't bring myself to care. Almost like I've become so de-sensitised to the almost monthly crisis's that seem to engulf states on the continent that seeing more has little or no impact. Sorry.
What infuriated me more and seems to becoming a regular fiasco in cinemas that have gallery seating are the arses who deliberately turn up late ie just as the film is starting, don't want to sit in the lesser positioned seats and think it ok to clamber into the gallery section. When naturally they are told to return to the normal seats they complain that they can't see from them, there aren't any left and why can't they just sit in the gallery. No word of a lie that on Saturday it must have happened with at least six or seven different groups of people and was still going on 10 minutes into the film. I came so close to saying "For fucks sake, can you just sit down at the front, shut up and let those that made the effort to turn up on time watch the bloody film". It's out of order that this growing band of chancers have the gall to assume they can get away with it, particularly when it begins to impact on the film for everyone else.
Sunday was very lazy and I miss not having some form of motorsport, whether F1 or MotoGP, to give structure to the day. At least it will return by March time and then is usually good enough to alternate each week between the two. It's even normally on at the just the right time to ensure I can get a nice Sunday lay in, get up for some tea and toast and plonk myself down on the sofa. Roll on those heady days.
Taking the biscuit - 29/01/2007
I had hoped to go swimming on Monday night and try and start another hard working week but I missed my window and headed straight home instead. Prepped a meal of microwave rice, not that good, and some chicken in a grossman sauce. I thought it would be something that I could knock up nice and quick in a chef style thing but in reality it was edible and nothing more. P had leant me Superman Returns. I'd always been put off this from the trailers and reviews that I'd seen but being offered it for nothing thought I'd check it out.
It was how I expected. The guy who plays Superman hardly says anything and doesn't really command presence. I didn't sympathise with him much after he comes back after six years and expects to pick up where he left off with Lois. I found his flying over to her house and his obsession with her rather creepy. Not that I warmed to her or her annoying kid. The only character I felt for was her ever supportive and far too nice boyfriend. The action scenes were very formulaic, Luthor's plan was just plain stupid and it was just long, tedious and boring. Why everyone was going on about it amazes me.
We were discussing favourite biscuits in the office on Tuesday and I told everyone that my fav's were Fox's classic. They are biscuits but like the classic bars you can buy. The actual biscuits don't seem to be sold by either Tesco's, Sainsbury's or the other supermarket chains and after 'bigging them up' I was keen for my colleagues to taste them. To this end I decided to email Fox's and ask whether they still made them and whether I could get hold of them.
"I wonder if you could help me. I am looking to buy your wonderful biscuits: Fox's classic biscuits. I seem to be able to find the bar version everywhere but not the actual biscuit "crumbly honeycomb biscuits covered in real milk chocolate".
I remember enjoying these a good few years ago and have always held them up as one of the best biscuits I've ever tasted. The honeycomb was so crumbly that if you left them unwrapped for more than a couple of hours they almost seemed to lose their 'crunch'. They always came in a glossy, dark blue outer packaging and were laid within a clear plastic tray. Just like the image that you have on this site.
Do you still make these biscuits (fingers crossed) and could you advise where I might be able to buy them from. All the major supermarkets only stock the bars and not the biscuits and myself, along with my fellow work colleagues, are becoming desperate to find the perfect accompaniment to our morning tea. I look forward to hearing from you."
Amazingly Fox's responded to my email within 20 minutes by informing me that they did still make them, that I could order a case directly from themselves and that she's popped some samples in the post to me. I was stunned at her efficiency and professional diligence and replied telling her so and cc'ing it to the Managing Director, Chief Executive, Head of Communication and Head of Internal Communication. I think good service and staff needs to be acknowledged and ultimately I hoped that this lady would be recognised by her superiors for her efforts. Later that night the Chief Executive responded to my email, assuring me that she would follow it up. I confess that my faith in there being people that take pride in their work was some way restored and the fact that she was even sending me some free packets was amazing and totally unexpected.
Woke up Wednesday to see everywhere covered in snow. It took me by surprise when I looked out of the bedroom window. I'd gone to bed late-ish and hadn't seen anything then so the notion that it had quietly fell and settled for the few hours that I slept was kinda cool. My next thought was on how problematic it might be getting into work but the roads were clear so besides a little extra caution from everyone, got into work fine. Made a conscious effort to hit the gym that night despite the cold and would you believe saw another Astra that decided it was important enough to take up two car parking spaces. This bugs the crap out of me, especially when the car park is so busy that cars are parked up kerbs etc. and I decided to leave a note on the car telling them so:
"What is it with you Astra drivers? You drive a Vauxhall not a Rolls Royce, so why don't you leave the double spacing next time"
Had a good session in the gym and saw two blondes that I'd seen in Ohm just before Christmas. The first was one who has an impossibly cute face (ICF) and the second is the one who used to work in the gym and has a cute body. I did my half hour running followed by a circuit of the weights and then went on the exercise bike. ICF went onto the running machine about 15 mins into my running session where she remained whilst I did the weights and the bike. I have to say I was impressed at her stamina and punishing regime. I respect people who are prepared to really work it in the gym rather than prance around looking good. Talking about 'working it' I pushed myself so hard on the running machine that the last 3-4 minutes of walking I had to hold onto the rail as I felt my balance was all off.
The biscuits arrived on Thursday, four packets, and they were great. I emailed a thanks to the lady at Fox's which I think sums up my thoughts:
"Just a quick email to thank you for the biscuits that arrived today. If I couldn't have asked for a quicker response to my initial email, then I couldn't have asked for a speedier delivery of the samples. They were even packed within polystyrene to avoid being broken during transit which was a nice touch.
They were exactly the ones I was enquiring about. I confess to there being some excitement in the office when they arrived. I quickly made a round of tea and then opened a pack. They looked good and tasted even better. I'd forgotten the rough textured honeycomb bottom to give them a 'cookie' like feel and the generous layer of quality milk chocolate. The inner tray also adds to the feeling that they are more than just an average biscuit.
They were very well received within the office with comments including "knocks McVities into a cocked hat", "a resounding success", "top biccy", "delightful", and "should be more widely available". Your generous provision of four packets, and my attempts to cut back after the excesses of Christmas, means that I'll probably take the next few weeks to enjoy them before making a direct order from yourself, that is if I don't see them in Tesco's.
Thank you once again for your friendly, efficient service. You have restored my faith that there are some people out there who take their job, and the image that their company presents, very seriously. I'm sorry that I'm not a huge wholesaler who could generate more recognition and revenue for your professional endeavours but I will do my own small part in encouraging others to try these and always turn to them when wanting a more special kind of biscuit.
All the very best"
After a lot of talking that we've done over the last few months P had decided to get herself a dog. We'd been quiet in the office and she'd used the time to narrow the search down to a few breeds. It was really great to see her getting excited about something and I know that the dog will mean a lot to her. I'd been pushing her to get a Golden Retriever but she was concerned that it would be too big for her small-ish house. One of her thoughts was a soft coated wheaten terrier and we had a look on youtube to see it they had any. You've got to hand it to the internet that once you have decided on something it's an excellent tool for sourcing information and to P's surprise they had loads of Wheaten videos.
They are very cute, not too small and seem to be real individuals. They don't shed, their coats are soft and the colour of wheat (hence the name) and they appear to be very friendly and sociable. So much so that they are infamous for the 'wheaten greetin' when they meet people. P decided this was definetly the breed she wanted and it was cool to be there when she made that decision. She's going to bring it into the office with her and naturally I offered my services to help in anyway that I could. You know me, I love seeing people get excited and P most definately was. So was I to be honest.
It had been a busy week for studio and hence we all got treated to a Friday hot lunch of fish 'n' chips. It was still good, though the fish a little oily. I began to think a little more in the afternoon about my brother and I holidaying in Orlando. It's quite a daunting prospect really. Orlando is such a big place and there are so many things to do that you have to invest a lot of time to get yourself up to speed with where you should stay, what you should see, when you should go etc. I merely scratched the surface on the internet and think I will need to invest some serious time before formulating what to do. Headed home that night and watched Severance on DVD with my brother. I know he wanted to see it and it was entertaining enough. There were lots of recognisable british faces and the lead was by Danny Dyer. He's ok to watch and reasonably charismatic but as every role he performs is the same as his one on The Football Factory he will begin to be labelled a one trick monkey soon.
I couldn't bring myself for some reason to hit the gym on Saturday so I sufficed with a trip to the swimming pool instead. Unfortunately they closed the separate swimming lanes at 5.00 and I had to join the rest of the swimmers in the general side of the pool. I did my best to continue bashing out the lengths and keep as close to the lane divider as I could. There were some annoying kids who kept standing on the rope divider but this was offset with a rather attractive girl who I kept passing as I swam backwards and forwards. There was no out and out smiling between us but at one point I stopped to rearrange my goggles, looked at her and she looked back. Wow, so desperate for female approval that I feel good when a girl actually notices me and then that's only because I keep splashing her as I go past!
I was supposed to have gone to a party that evening and I felt bad not going but M was still feeling unwell, my brother was working late and I felt knackered so made do with a couple of DVD's and some chicken pasta. My brother had picked out Revolver, the film by Guy Ritchie. We knew it had been slated when released but really how bad could it be. Well it was truly awful, I mean appalling. Long, overblown, confusing, over reliant on tedious, meandering narration and a pointless ending. There were no credits at the beginning or even the end of the film indicating that no one wanted to put their name to this piece of shit. It really was that bad. It just went on and on, dabbled with moments of animation, flashy editing and was utter bollocks. It's now the template for bad films and no wonder Madonna had to launch a few more records because Ritchie's reputation has nose dived like a WWII bomber. Thankfully the night was saved with Thank you for Smoking. An intelligent, well made film about a pro-smoking lobbyist. At it's heart was the notion that everyone has a choice and the power of arguing. I agreed with a lot of what the character said and it made me laugh in all the right places. Not something you would expect Hollywood to have the balls to make but I say credit to them.
I contemplated the idea of hitting the gym on Sunday but an afternoon of Gears of War put paid to that. Top Gear re-started that night and it was good to see Richard Hammond and his accident. The rest of the show seemed to have lost a little of it's crispness and I hope it manages to re-find it's feet. Followed this with the Dawn of the Dead remake on TV, which is one of my favourite films. John Carpenters The Fog was on even later and I toyed with staying up and watching it but finishing at 2.40 was even too late for me.
No knockout and my sexuality is questioned - 22/01/07
The week started busy at work which is always good for this time of year. I got more advice on the dangers of my reduced food intake from work colleagues but soldiered on and nailed out another swimming session. The pool is filling up again with more annoying arseholes so I can see myself having to go later in the evening to avoid the slow coaches and end of lane crowders. Had an important client presentation on the Wednesday, working from a brief we'd received the previous week so most of Tuesday was spent prepping for this. I continue to be impressed how we can take a brief and then a week later come back with thought through creative routes, budget and presentation collateral. Getting all of this on board and ringbound did take us into the wee hours of Wednesday morning. The meeting went well but we had more fire fighting to do when we got back to the office meaning I missed my gym window that evening. Instead of going for only half an hour I decided to head home for a plate of stewed steak and vegetables and watch Rocky III.
It's another good entry as far as I'm concerned. Some great lines, good fights both in the comical Thunderlips (aka Hulk Hogan) charity fight and the two Clubber Lang matches and some excellent training. The work with Apollo is outstanding and the final fight where Rocky starts taunting Clubber is brilliant. It ain't no Apocalypse Now but it still gets my heart pounding and who can ask for more than that? If I was bad for missing the gym on Wednesday then I compounded it on Thursday by foregoing the swim to ensure that I got in Rocky IV and V that night. Rocky IV is a really good addition to the series and even though II is my clear winner it is hard to say whether III or IV is the next best one. By IV Sly had the formula down to a fine art and the fighting and training are probably the best of the whole series. The juxtaposition of their two training routines is great and some of the moves that Rocky pulls out like the stomach pulls up to the raised beam or the inverted leg raise, I'm not sure of the correct title but it's where he slowly lowers his legs using his stomach and lower back muscles - incredible. This is only surpassed when Rocky starts running up the mountain. The music which builds with it really struck a chord with me especially the part where it evolves into something resembling the Rocky theme. Indeed when I played that particular moment to P in the office the next morning I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I wasn't sad, it was just something in the tune that triggered something. Anyway the fight is excellent, especially the moment when Rocky throws an almighty punch which cuts Drago and causes him to stagger back. I've seen it a lot of times but you still want to jump up and scream "go on Rocky!!". Even the fifth wasn't quite as bad as I remember though the continued use of the films obvious slogan 'go for it' did begin to grate along with the awful 'urban' soundtrack.
I brought the box set into work with me on Friday as I wanted P to see the Stallone interview that is on it. He comes across really well and I thought it would add to the growing Rocky fever. I might have been getting unneccesarily excited but sometimes the journey can be just as much fun as the destination and a little Rocky appreciation never did anyone any harm. That night we headed down to Bluewater and having pre-booked the tickets decided to grab a bite to eat. We had wanted to try out Nando's but the queue's were ridiculously long and hence we plumped for Tootsie's. The burgers were good and I spoiled myself with a sticky toffee pudding. What the hell, how regularly does a new Rocky film come out? We got our seats, which were excellently positioned, and waited for it to start with a mixture of excitement and trepidation.
So what did I think. Well as my brother said it was more the Rocky V that we wanted and in some aspects we were pleased but overall we were disappointed. The film was more character driven and showed how Rocky had gotten older. He was as likable as ever, had lost Adriane which still cut him up, and was running a little restaurant. It was good to see Uncle Paulie, along with other characters from old. Rocky also met the woman who'd grown from the girl that had told him way back in the first film to "screw you creepo". Their budding friendship was nice and gentle though his attempts to befriend the gangsta son seemed a little forced and pointless.
Where the film disappointed though was it's handling of the two things that Rocky films do best. The training and the fighting. As another friend said Rocky's training and fight scenes are like Bond's gadgets and girls. The film is about age not being a barrier so once you've made the audience believe that Rocky could do it why deny them what they crave. The setup was all there. A woefully under-used Duke explained that speed was out and blunt force trauma ie hurt bombs would be required. Hence you believed that the training, and subsequent fight, would be geared around learning this new way as they did in Rocky II where he learned to switch from southpaw or learning rhythm and speed in Rocky III but this didn't happen. The training started, the music swelled and you could almost feel the atmosphere of the cinema audience rise up yet before you knew it the training was over. Not only did it deprive everyone of what they wanted but it also damaged the credibility of him getting back in the ring as you didn't really get to see him work on the gameplan.
The fight was the same. The champs style look sloppy, and clearly the actor (he's actually a boxer) hadn't prepped himself physically, and Rocky's looked even worse. The notion that he couldn't rely on speed but instead had to draw him in to land the bombs wasn't really played out and instead hidden behind a deluge of lightning editing, shaky black and white shots, flashbacks of Adriane's gravestone and an HBO style perspective. Noteworthy exchanges were missing, there were no crunching blows with water spraying off the head and the ebbs and flows of the match as each one had a better round were absent. Even if he'd put the champ on his arse who'd then been saved by the bell it might have worked. It was good to see Rocky back on the big screen but ultimately I have to concede that I was disappointed. If it brings more interest from the youngsters who then embrace the series then I'm glad but I think Sly could have done better.
Saturday was hard to drag myself to the gym but the thoughts of a newly downloaded ASOT helped. Once there I knocked out a good 450 cals on the treadmill, 100 on the bike, a circuit of the weight machines and a final 150 on the cyclic trainer. I was exhausted and regained my energy by collapsing on a crash mat and listening to the latest addition to my melancholy playlist. Evacuating London - Chronicles of Narnia. Dire film but good music.
Was out in Blackheath that night with M and brother to hook up with some girls that he had met. He'd only met one of them and she was bringing along two new friends who we'd never met. I had a couple of thoughts of how I would perform, whether I'd be liked etc but dismissed the nerves by thinking it was highly unlikely that I would find any of them attractive. Surprisingly they were both pretty and chatty. We talked animatedly and one of them, N, had been to my old school which generated a whole line of excited conversation. We moved onto Cave Austin and continued to buy them drinks. Chatted a bit more to N who'd got a degree in Russian, Philosophy and Architecture. When I asked why she hadn't used her qualifications in her career she asked whether I'd ever heard of the concept of enlightenment. It was refreshing to talk to someone so articulate but there was a hint of dismissive arrogance that I didn't like and would continue to grow.
We moved downstairs to the nightclub part and seemed to lose them a little bit. The setting wasn't condusive to chatting and they started to pull the 'sexy dirty dancin' routine far enough away from us to gain the attention of other guys. I don't blame anyone for being attention seeking but when a girl does it to get other guys looking I simply say 'good luck'. If you want to look elsewhere then I'm fine with that but I won't start competing for your attention. At one point, and with the dance floor only about 1/4 full one of the girls started to grind her body against mine. I didn't respond in kind. I wasn't unpleasant or stand-offish but in a virtually deserted dancefloor I wasn't prepared to 'grind' back. I'm an ok solo dancer but my lack of regular close dancing with girls means that I do feel awfully self conscious and clumsy when dancing with them, especially when sober. If slow dancing then the shuffling feet always seem to get in the way and if 'dirty dancin - grindin' how far do you go? Anyway my lack of participation was greeted with
"Are you gay?".
"No" I replied. Why do women assume that if they grinds some bloke that he has to respond like a dribbling neanderthal that is desperate to touch her. Surely it's no worse than me assuming that if a woman doesn't respond to me rubbing my crotch in her arse that she must be a lesbian. Needless to say this resulted in a bit of cooling towards me from said girl. As the night drew on it was obvious that being six of us I would need to do two trips in my car if we wanted to move on anywhere else. When I had cars that were more like 'ferries' I wouldn't mind cramming in six but the Fiesta isn't designed for that and thus I'm not prepared to do it. Explaining the idea of going back to M's with four people which would leave two who I would come back for was proving frustrating in handling their egos and I confess to coming close to saying "Ok, find your own way home, I simply don't care'. But we are good blokes and if you come out with us we'll do our best to make sure you get home safely.
So I did one trip and then came back for my brother and N. My earlier fears which had been born out with her 'pussy cat dolls' dancing to be seen by others but then return to us for free drinks was further confirmed in her attitude to music. She loved rock music and didn't want to listen to anything new. I tried to play her the great 'Music' by John Miles but she grumbled like a spoilt child and we skipped forward. I did quote her back about the notion of enlightenment towards new things but the irony was completely lost on her. I dropped Whitesnake - Here I Go again which at first she claimed it wasn't and then when proved that it was, moaned that it was the wrong version as the correct version goes 'like a hobo I was born to walk alone'. Technically she was correct that Whitesnake did record this version in 1982 and then re-recorded another version in 1987 replacing the hobo with drifter because they thought it might sound like homo. It was further proof though of her increasingly desperate attempts to prove her intelligence. I'm not threatened by intelligent women but continual point scoring does become tedious. At their request for food we stopped at the KFC and headed back to M's. When N had eaten, and more importantly when no one was talking to her, she mumbled about being tired and wanting to go home. I dropped them all of safely though it was no surprise that this girl kept asking for different songs to be played despite what anyone else wanted. I did enjoy myself on the night and it's always good to chat and meet different people. The other two girls were really nice and friendly but despite being bubbly and pretty, N was high maintenance and I don't know if I could spend an evening massaging that ego again.
Brother brought his 360 back up on the Sunday for some system link GOW but on the harder insane level. It was a entertaining and took us nicely up to dinner where I tried one of Lloyd Grossman's Indian sauces. You all know how much I like his Italian sauces but this was fantastic. Chopped up three pre-cooked chicken breasts which I added to his Tikka Masala sauce, boiled up some rice and enjoyed an awesome curry. Whether it was down to the lack of a big decent feast, I don't know but christ it was good. Spicy but not too hot and it left a delicious aftertaste. Minutes after eating it and I was already looking forward to when I could have it again. Watched the film Contact again later that night. What a lovely, wonderful film this is. Confident, assured direction from Robert Zemeckis and a brilliant story. It perfectly captures the whole wonder and fascination that I have with space. Poses interesting questions about science and faith and who we are within the cosmos. Like he did for Forrest Gump, Alan Silvestri weaves another delicate score. I love the character of Haddon, played by John Hurt, particularly the moment when he says to Ellie "They still want an American to go. Wanna take a ride". It's such a great film, so thought provoking, so deft at handling big issues like the cosmos and small issues like personal vindication of your hopes and dreams. It also features one of my favourite film lines. "Small moves Ellie, small moves".
Looking forward to Rocky and a taste of hard regime - 15/01/07
After the excess of the Sunday, the new week heralded a renewed attempt at cutting back. My stomach has been feeling bloated, I've noticed myself cupping it with my hand when I go to bed and after a big meal I feel a real pressure building. Hence it was time to get a little trim. I'm not making a bold new years resolution or anything, just at the moment the enthusiasm is there, plus the monthly gym debits, to encourage me to work at it again.
Surprisingly it didn't take too long to find my stomach and hunger shrinking to the point where I was eating very little. Colleagues flapped that I was doing it all wrong and unhealthy. Yeah, yeah, maybe so. I have never said that my way is the right way and have never claimed it is the healthy way. But it's my way. If I start something, and especially when I've done these fitness drives, I always start with a big gesture when enthusiasm is at it's highest. I know that the more sensible way is slow controlled exercise and a switch to healthier foods like salads and vegetables. Thing is, I can't stand salad or daily vegetables. I'd rather have less of what I like than more of what I don't. Ok, I need to lose weight and cut back but eating crap I don't want to is more depressing than getting by on less of what I do like. I look at the basic concept, and maybe this only works for me, but you simply eat less and exercise more.
With this in mind I returned to the swimming pool on Monday. The car park was a lot busier than I remember but thankfully, and only probably on this occasion, the swimming lanes were not as busy. Felt funny to be back in the water. Having been out for three months or so I was feeling knackered after a few lengths and was really blowing the cobwebs out of the corners of my lungs. First client meeting of the year on the Wednesday went well and followed this with my first trip to the gym that evening. Like the swimming it was good to be back and the nano managed to get me through the more difficult parts. Thank god for the nano and those senheiser headphones. Thursday I hit the pool again and a colleague had asked me to take note of how long it took me to complete 12 lengths (300 metres). He was entering a triathlon and had the splits from the 300m swimming event. They ranged from 6.15 to around 12 minutes and I think he was curious at my performance to gauge what he thought he would be doing. Thursday night seems to be swim-exercise for the ladies so only half the pool is available to general swimmers so I bashed out some widths until they opened the full lengths back up. By this time there were only a few people swimming and I decided to have a crack at the time trial. I could only really rely on the analogue clock on the wall but thought it should do. I blasted off at 9.42 dead and really powered into the lengths. I had already put a good 25 minutes of swimming in and was finding it hard to concentrate on the mounting lengths as well as remember the start time. I hammered out the last length as fast as I could, touched and looked up to see 9.48.20 meaning I'd done it in 6 mins 20, which I was pretty chuffed with. I'm not being arrogant but it's nice to know you ain't bad at something.
I didn't do much Friday though my hunger had shrunk to the point where I seemed to make do with just a few glasses of orange. I didn't feel faint or anything, I just simply wasn't hungry. Saturday was a big old session in the gym which included a go on the exercise bikes. I normally shy away from these as I worry that the extra cycles won't do wonders for my knees but I decided to attempt a 20 minute bash. I did it but was disappointed at the calories burnt. Twenty minutes on the running machine would be close to 300 calories yet on the bike it was only about 120. Grabbed a couple of DVD's that night. The Alibi with Steve Coogan and Snakes on a Plane. The Alibi was very poor. It looked more like a promo vehicle for Coogan breaking the US as he seemed to swagger around in grey suits and drive an Aston Martin. The film was average and Coogan brought nothing to the role that anyone else couldn't have. I'd been wary of Snakes but after reading a couple of reviews which indicated that it was good, simple fun like Tremors but had just had over exposure. Brother had been a little wary but it couldn't be any worse than the Alibi we thought.
It was refreshingly good fun. There were plenty of 'hand on mouth, I can't believe someone just gotten bitten there by a snake moments' some funny lines and some good action scenes. Very entertaining. With Rocky Balboa due out soon I decided to catch up on some Rocky on Sunday. Watched both I and II and it was great to see them again. They are brilliant films, hard wired into my soul. He's such a nice character and you can't help but cheer or feel a lump at the back of your throat at certain scenes. The end of II did me in like it always does. I've gotta lot of time for Sly. He wrote it himself, could have taken the money for the script and ran but held out to ensure he was cast in the main role, it won four oscars and even Frank Capra said it was a film that he wished he had made. Sly always seems to be so quickly dismissed but it would have been an empty world without the Rocky films. I feel the excitement mounting for next Friday when we intend to see it.
Doing what I do best - 08/01/07
I awoke on New Years day with a killer of a headache. Did the late night mint Baileys really affect me that badly? I managed to deduce after a couple of Anadin and a cup of tea that it was caused by the smoke that had ingrained itself into my clothing the previous night. I guess it's an indication of how much from society, smoking has been removed, and in turn my exposure to it, that it's stench could have such an impact. It seems to turn all the air around it into this thick heavy blanket that clogs your brain. Not nice.
With the aid of tea and snacks I managed to complete Rainbow 6, which was good. I've really enjoyed playing it and working my way through the various casino's. I look forward to coming back to it to try it on the 'realistic' setting and maybe playing it co-op with bro, if we hire another copy from the vid shop.
Back to work reasonably promptly after the holiday and it was good to be back and catch up with everyone. After handing out the two cards, the sticker coverage that my friends provided and also the extra 'surf' time over the festive season, I was disappointed that my site had received no more visitors than normal and absolutely no emails. I know I owe ones to Amy, Steph and a few others but I'd hoped for at least one or two new readers. New year, same shit I guess.
The week was quiet overall and traffic was light coming in which is always good. I'm sure the rat race will be returning in full next week. Having spent so much time at home I didn't mind staying late at work to add to my site. More rants, more Q & A and completed the journal up to New Years Eve. That's an entire year then. An entire year in the life of a 35 year old male. Not scintillating reading I'm sure but maybe it brought some smiles and insight to a few. I'm glad I got it all down. It will be nice in a couple of years to go back and see what I got up to. Of course winning the lottery now would be great. What a book that would make. A year in the life of an average guy and then a year in the life of an average guy who won a fortune. The reader would get the chance to know me prior to the win to then share the exciting things I did when funds became unlimited.
I thought during the week, this time of year being good for reflection, of my time in Vegas and for some reason of the attractive VIP waitress, Holly Voss, who'd served us that night. I decided to 'google her' and amazingly she came up third on the list, well her myspace page did. She looked good, though her photos didn't do her justice. They gave the impression that her good looks came only from her make-up and clothing, when in reality her beauty was far more natural. Her myspace 'friends' and contributors all similarly came from the 'good looking' pool and first impressions were that it would be pointless writing but I thought I'd give it a go. It was quite a nice message. I didn't want to come across as a stalker and commented on some of her likes and dislikes and her impressive 'go getting' attitude. Needless to say I'm not expecting anything or becoming obsessed but the internet is about chatting, so why not? I also used the time to update my Faceparty, myspace and lycos pages and even attempted to take a look at the lycos chat forums but they looked far too daunting and fast moving for me to grasp or engage in any meaningful chat.
During the week we had talked in the office about my attitude to women which over the year(s) has become more jaded and cynical. M commented quite insightfully how ironic it was that someone who liked and loved women so much could turn to dislike them. I don't think I dislike them. Granted in the office I play up to that stereotypical caricature for laughs but in reality I'm just someone who is a bit more wary. There are good and bad people in the world, whether male or female, but naturally my opinions are more directed at women as it's not the company of men that I am looking to make. It's individuals that are complicated, fucked up and different but as my dealings, desire and hopes are that of interacting with women then this must explain why the negative sides of women are more what I see and become unsettled about.
My friends tell me that if I ever want a girl, to never mention my site as they would be immediately put off. Doesn't this advice simply highlight the stereotype that I'm saying exists. That most women don't want to try and understand what it is that I think and write about, that they would not prefer the complexities of a slightly different guy but ultimately want a bland, vanilla and controllable bloke. P reckons my writing style makes me come across as aggressive. Am I being hoisted by my own petard in that because I can alter the tone of voice when trying to imply annoyance at a rant that people assume I'm always like that.
In essence I just want people to understand me. If you take a narrow snapshot of anyone at a certain time you could gain a skewed perception of that person. What my site hopes to do is give the reader all of me. The times when I write angry in my rants, writing with melancholy if talking about relationships and writing excitedly when discussing films, music or games. We are all, well maybe nearly all, complex and multi dimensional and my site tries to show all the facets and sides of my character. What I need is someone who doesn't know me to read all of my site and then make a judgement call on who I am. My friends for their part think that if someone did, particularly a woman, they wouldn't like me.
Watched Alec Baldwin perform another cracking role in the film Malice on Friday night. He stars in it along with Nicole Kidman as a couple of con artists who try to fool an insurance company and Nicole's on screen husband, Bill Pullman. It's a good film but Alec plays the arrogant and super confident doctor to a T. His "you think I have a god complex, I am god" speech in the legal hearing is awesome and rivals his Glengarry Glen Ross performance. I ummed and ahhed about the gym on Saturday but conscious that I'd had fish 'n' chips for lunch on the Friday and would be eating huge on the Sunday at P's decided against it. I still felt knackered as I tried to re-calibrate my body clock and just fussed around the flat doing washing etc. Was heading out that night to a friend of M's house party. Collected bro and then in turn him before arriving at the party at around 9ish.
It wasn't a heaving mass of people but there must have been about 20. We got the introductions out of the way and sorted out our drinks. It was nice to chat to others and pick through the nibbles. They had a large bowl of tortilla chips and I allayed the initial hesitancy in conversation by continually searching for the complete triangle of a tortilla chip. You can't really sift through the chips so regularly pull one out that looks like it could be a complete triangle to discover it's just an edge. If you do then grab a whole one you run the risk of that disappointing crack when you become a little too ambitious in how much dip you can scoop up onto it and it breaks off inside the salsa. A gay chap started chatting to me and he was interesting to talk to though he did seem oblivious to the notion of body space as he'd keep stepping in just a little too close. Each time I would make a subtle step back he would then step closer about five minutes later. In the end I found myself positioning the nibbles table between us to maintain the reassurance of my body zone and overtly discussing my fondness for large breasted girls to indicate my hetrosexuality.
Everyone was good spirited and the host had some tunes playing from her playlist but it still wasn't jumping. Step in my all time classic Breeze Classics CD. A friend put it together a good few years ago for me and is just perfect for parties with the likes of Footloose, Let's hear it for the boy etc on it. I'd brought it along just in case and it dropped it with immediate appreciation from everyone. I did my usual scooting around ensuring that everyone was happy and dancing and spent some time dancing with a particularly smooth and good proportioned rolling pin. I don't know why I just liked the feel of it. This along with a cucumber then began to get passed round the room between people's legs. Along with bro and M we were keen to keep everyone entertained and M was fielding questions on how I could be so energetic and fun if I hadn't been drinking. That nice relaxed atmosphere developed where people were comfortable talking to anyone, dancing with confidence or doing anything ridiculous to get a laugh. I chatted to quite a few other people and by the time we left at around 3.00 ish had made everyone aware of our existence. It felt great leaving the party knowing that we had made a real difference. I'm not being arrogant but it is what we are good at and really should be available for hire. My bro provides the younger angle, the looks and also dances, M provides the older angle, the looks and the chat and I provide the music and stimulus to get everyone up enjoying themselves. It was nice to start the year with a reminder that I am good at somethings and can be entertaining to be with. As the party was in Blackheath it felt only right to stop at the tea hut for a burger, tea and a congratulatory pat on the back to ourselves.
Sunday was up and out to head over to P's to watch her 6 video'd episodes of Lost:Series 3. We stopped at Sainsburys to get her some flowers as well as a few bits and pieces. We watched her through a level of Halo and then got ourselves settled. After the dips the previous night, bro and I had got a selection of tortilla chips and dips to carry us through the episodes. To it's credit Lost started firing on all cyclinders from the first drop and the first few scenes were fascinating. It didn't seem to get caught up in itself and trivial stories and concentrated on the tales of Jack, Sawyer and Kate being kidnapped initially. We broke half way through for a roast dinner that P cooked which was great but masses of. I don't regret eating that much (as I write this I am hungry and thus wish I'd eaten more) but had to collapse on the sofa afterwards. Some Takeshi's Castle on Sky kept us entertained, well pissing our pants actually, until the food had settled and we could start on the second half of the six. I still enjoyed this and was shocked at the death of some characters but did become a little tired at Kate continually comprimising Sawyer and Jack's escape attempts. I think the makers started to pull that card too many times and in the end you felt neither would escape as when one would formulate a break her life would be threatened by the others.
By the end of the six episodes they could have killed her to be honest as she'd thoroughly pissed me off by then. I know throughout the show characters have been popular and unpopular with me but her selfishness was beginning to bug me. They showed some of her previous life, where even though she knows she is always on the run decided to marry a guy only to leave him a few weeks later when she feels restless. It didn't help that the guy was Nathan Fillion from Serenity and it certainly didn't make me sympathise with her character. Back in current time she wants to be with Sawyer and begs Jack to do something he doesn't want to otherwise they will kill Sawyer. She then spends the night with Sawyer and just as he's about to be killed Jack effectively rescues them by telling them to get to away while he stays behind and we then get crocodile tears from Kate saying that she doesn't want to leave Jack. Give me a break sister, you don't care about anyone apart from yourself. All my negative thoughts of women came out seeing her compromising everything. The makers certainly aren't painting the women in a good light. Sun is shown to have had an affair while Kate is playing two guys off against each other. Sawyer frustrated me at his gormlessly being duped. I won't say what it was but he had just been shown that he'd been lied to then swallowed an even bigger lie. I guess the series is doing it's job in keeping me involved, entertained and yet frustrated at some things which to me are blatantly obvious. It was a good day. Thought provoking with Lost, mirth making with Takeshi's Castle and stomach swelling with the huge amount of food.
Talk soon.